Victims of Love
by MrsCullen6
Summary: Edward never came back. Four years later Bella is now a nurse at Seattle Grace hospital. One day when she comes to work she discovers there are 2 new doctors in town, the Cullens. What will happen? ExB story. R
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

*~*~*

_I watched the sunshine down on the beautiful meadow, if it had of been any other day this would have definitely been the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life. But the beauty of this meadow was nothing compared to the angel that lied beside me. I smiled at that thought and turned to stare into Edwards eyes. _

"_What are you thinking?" his smooth velvety voice whispered, his warm breath caressing my face as he stared back at me, unleashing the full power of his eyes._

"_I was just thinking about how lucky I am" I said closing my eyes trying to embed everything about him in my brain. As I did so he lightly touched his lips to mine bringing his hand up and placing it softly on my arm. _

"_Bella?" he said softly _

"Bella? Come on Bella" I slowly opened my eyes

"Bella, wake up," suddenly the cool hand, was replaced by a hand that was extremely hot and it was shaking me, trying to wake me up

I looked at the clock it was 4:00. "Go away" I groaned, pulling my doona over my head and closing my eyes hopeful that I may return to that wonderful dream.

"Fine be late for work, see if I care," my roommate Jacob said to me shattering any hopes I had of falling back asleep, still I tried again. "It's not my ass on the line if you're late," he hissed

"Ok, Ok I'm up," I fired back angrily throwing the covers off, glaring at him as I sat up in my bed. "Happy?"

"Extremely," he said smugly and chuckled at the reaction he got out of me. "Gee, Bella you would think that after a year of nursing you would be used to early mornings, I made coffee for you princess."

I not so politely told him where he could stick his coffee as I made my way to the bathroom slamming the door shut for dramatic effect. A little over the top I know but some times Jake annoyed the crap out of me. Not that the reaction this morning was really his fault, it was mine. Me and my stupid imagination. I mean I dreamed of Edward every night but nothing like this. Usually I was just running after him, never being able to catch him of course, but yet I still chased. I was used to that dream so it had no effect on me, but not this one. This one was so vivid. I could feel his cold, hard marble skin, I could smell his sweet scent, I could feel his breath on my face…I could feel his lips against mine.

It had been 4 years since Edward had actually touched me, 4 years since I had actually felt his perfect lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around my chest as the whole in my heart twinged. I remembered the day he left me like it was yesterday.

_Flashback_

"_Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He had said slowly and precisely_

"_You don't want me?" I asked_

"_No" he replied_

_End of Flashback_

I became slightly breathless as I remembered that horrible day, a solitary tear slid down my cheek I wiped it away quickly, getting a hold of myself. _"Get a grip, Bella"_ I thought angrily to myself as I stepped in the shower _"It was_ _a stupid dream, don't let it affect you like this"_. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and turned the tap letting the water glide over me.

I stood there, for I don't know how long hoping that the warm water would wash away my dream. When I realised it wouldn't I got out and got dressed in my nursing outfit. I never thought of myself as a nurse, it was Jake's idea actually. He'd mentioned one night that I'd be great at it. I started studying it at uni and loved it so I never looked back.

Jake was always helping me like that; he truly was my best friend. He was the person who saved me. He was the one who held me together when Edward left. If it wasn't for him I don't think I could have survived it. I loved him, not in a romantic way of course, it was more in a way a sister loves a brother. There was a time when he thought maybe it was more than that, but he soon realised that we were better off as friends.

Now we live together in Seattle, Washington. We chose Seattle because I'd always loved Seattle Grace hospital and I wanted to work there. Also Seattle isn't too far from Forks, so if there was an emergency in LaPush and the pack needed Jake it wasn't too hard for him to get home. It was hard for Jake to leave the pack, I told him that I would be fine by myself. I was a big girl and didn't need a babysitter. But he was just so damn stubborn and insisted on moving with me. Actually I think Charlie had something to do with it. Jake and Charlie always had, and still do have, secret conversations about me. I think Charlie was the one that convinced him too come and watch over me because he couldn't do it himself.

It's not that I don't like them looking after me and watching over me. It's just that I would rather somebody else to be doing that instead. Unfortunately I was too boring for him and he had moved on, I can't do that. It's not that I haven't tried, I mean I've been on a few dates but it just could never compare to Edward and the way he made me feel. So eventually I just stopped trying and just settled on being without someone for the rest of my life. They always say that the only man a girl can trust is her father. I guess that's true, well with one major exception, Jake. He and my father are the only people now who care for me.

I was pulled from my own thoughts when I heard a soft knock on the door

"Hey Bells you almost ready?" Jake asked. There was a hint of concern in his voice. Great now Jake knew something was up. _"Good one Bella"_ I chastised myself.

"Yeah, I'll be out in a minute," I said back, trying but failing to keep hurt out of my voice. Jake now definitely knew that I was upset and there would be 20 questions about what's wrong, great. Why do I have to be so readable?

It wasn't really my fault though, Jake is just so damn observant when it comes to me. He always knew when something was up and he usually new exactly who it was about. I composed myself and put a smile on my face. I looked at myself in the mirror. "_Great work Bella you should become an actor"_, I thought to myself as I looked at my reflection. The smile I had on was so fake I don't think even Jessica Stanley would have believed it. I opened the door slowly, trying my best to be cheerful

I walked to Jake who was now sitting on the couch playing Need For Speed on the Playsation. Wow I must have been in the shower for a long time, no wonder Jake knew something was up. He stood up and walked over too me.

"Ok let's go" I said and playfully punched him in the arm. Huge mistake. There was a searing pain in my right hand. "Owwww," I said and grimaced as the pain intensified. I glared at Jake who was clearly trying not laugh.

"Ugh, you bas-,"

"Bella," Jake interrupted before I could shout at him, his mouth twitched at the corners "how was this possibly my fault?" Jake continued letting out a small laugh. He composed himself and then looked at me waiting for my answer.

"Uh…..well…..um," I said trying to think of a reason. He was right I mean I should know that punching a werewolf probably wasn't the best idea.

"See" he said smugly his mouth now smirking at me "now let's go before your late, plus I think you might need to get that hand checked out". I walked toward the door.

"Stupid werewolf" I muttered as I walked outside. I heard Jake chuckle behind me and soon we were in his car driving to the hospital. At least one good thing came from me punching Jake. He had now forgotten about me being upset. I quickly took a side glance at him. He was watching me from the corner of his eye, concern clearly etched on his face. Ok maybe he hadn't forgotten, Damn! Our eyes met and I knew what was coming next. Yay, question time.

"Bells" Jake sighed "are you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to guess?"

"Neither," I said back to him inhaling deeply, "because there is nothing wrong," I lied. I knew this wasn't going to work but I had to try.

"Bella," Jake growled back angrily, "you are a shitty liar and you know it, come on talk to me." He stopped the car, as we were at the entrance to the hospital, and turned to look at me grabbing my hand which, I was surprised, was no longer hurting "Please," he added. His eyes bore into mine, I instantly wished they were Edwards topa- _"Stop thinking about him, he doesn't love you," _I told myself angrily before I could get any deeper into that thought.

"Jake," I sighed tearing my eyes from his, "I have to get to work, I promise we will talk about this later." He opened his mouth to argue. "I just can't talk right now ok."

He closed his mouth and sighed.

"Ok Bells, we _will _talk about it later." He said clearly emphasising the _will_. He leaned over and gave me hug. I returned it; I loved Jakes hugs it was when I felt safest. After about a minute I let go and opened the door and hoped out slowly.

"Bells," he said before I could close the door, "you know the drill, if you need anything at all give me a call and I'll be here, ok. Oh and don't forget to get that hand checked out".

"Actually my hand isn't hurting anymore," I replied smiling slightly. It wasn't a real smile but it wasn't completely fake either. "I'll seeya after work Jake. Bye". I closed the door and gave him one last wave before turning to walk into the hospital. As I did so I gasped in shock.

I could have sworn I saw a flash of bronze through the doors of the hospital. When I looked again there was nothing. _"Excellent Bella, you're crazy,"_ I angrily thought to myself, _"not only do you dream about him, you now imagine that he is here"_. This of course was ridiculous. He couldn't be here in Seattle.

I turned a little to see a middle aged woman approaching me "Hey Bella, excited for another day of work?" she said smiling and stopping to stand beside me.

"Yeah, of course," I said forcing a smile on my face. She smiled back and then walked towards the entrance of Seattle Grace. I took a deep breath, preparing for the days work and followed her in.

*~*~*

As I walked into the Nurses station I could hear two nurses talking animatedly. _Hmmm I wonder what's got them so excited. Did one of them get laid last night?_ I smiled to myself as I thought about that and walked over to them. There names were Jen and Millie, they were my two best friends at the hospital. We weren't really close but I felt semi comfortable around them.

Jen was tall with dark brown hair and emerald green eyes. She had perfect lips and a smile to die for. Millie had platinum blonde hair with big blue eyes and a perfect bone structure. It always surprised me that they were nurses, I always thought that they would be better suited to modelling. As much as I liked them there was always one thing that annoyed me. They were the two biggest gossips you would ever meet. When they started gossiping I usually tuned them out or pretended to be interested in what they were saying. When I reached where they were sitting they both turned and smiled at me.

"Hey Bella" they both said in unison. They then both giggled excitedly.

"Hey" I said and sat down on a chair that was free next to Jen. She turned and looked at Millie and then turned to look at me again. _Ok here we go._

"Oh my gosh, Bella we have two new doctors. They are both absolutely gorgeous. Apparently they are father and son and just moved here recently. I can't wait for you to see them. Did I mention they are gorgeous?" Jen said whilst jumping up and down in her swinging chair. She looked at Millie again and they both squealed.

"Ok cool, what are there names?" I said feigning interest.

"Dr C-" Jen started until we heard a beeping noise coming from one of the patient's rooms. I ran into the room and saw that the patient was crashing. I quickly ran to the bed and pressed the button.

"_Code Blue ICU, Code Blue ICU," _I heard come over the speakers. Jen and Millie ran in with crash cart and I began resuscitating the guy. Almost instantly a doctor entered the room and began to take charge. I didn't look up to see which doctor it was. I was too busy trying to save the guys life. The doctor began telling me what to do. His voice sounded familiar but I couldn't concentrate on that right now. We had to save this guy.

Eventually we got the patients heart rate back up and he was stable. I breathed deeply relieved.

"Good work everyone" the familiar voice said. _Wait a minute that sounded exactly like. No it can't be._ I turned around to find the source of this voice, my jaw dropped and I gasped.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey guys thanks so much for reading my story. I didn't think that many ppl would read it so when I came on n saw that a lot of ppl had I was very excited. Anyway if u do read it pls, pls review because they make me feel special n happy n make me want 2 write more. Neway hope u enjoy the chapter sorry it took a while.**

**Thanx 2 ****KittenEm, fatallyobsessed, Turtlefrenzy and Connie for reviewing you guys rock!!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

***~*~***

"_Good work everyone" the familiar voice said. Wait a minute that sounded exactly like. No it can't be. I turned around to find the source of this voice, my jaw dropped and I gasped. _

"Ed-Edward," I stuttered, curling my hands into fists. This couldn't be real it had to be a dream, my mind playing tricks on me. _He couldn't be here. Could he? No that's ridiculous it's just my imagination. _I closed my eyes and pinched myself hoping to confirm my suspicions. I took a deep breath and slowly opened my eyes. I gasped in shock again.

It wasn't my imagination, he was really there. He was standing right in front of me, close enough to touch. My angel, my Greek God, my Adonis, my one and only true love…my Edward.

"Bella," he breathed, his velvety voice so quiet that only I could hear him. I inhaled deeply and reluctantly looked up at his face. He looked surprised but composed, unlike me who was standing there like an idiot. His eyes bore into mine with such intensity that my breathing became rapid and my heart started beating uncontrollably. He opened his mouth to say something but before he could he was interrupted by the Chief of the hospital, Dr Cooper.

"Ah Dr Cullen, just the man I was looking for," Dr Cooper said, "if you have a moment I was wondering if we could speak". Edward stared at me for a few seconds before he pulled his eyes from mine and looked at Dr Cooper with a smile on his face. My breathing slowed now and my heart rate returned to normal allowing me to think more clearly. _I can't be here right now not with him_. What was I supposed to say to him, _"Hi Edward how are you, that's great, oh by the way I am still completely obsessed with you". _That would work out well, not. I needed to get out of there before the awkward conversation that I didn't want to have started. I mentally thanked Dr Cooper for allowing me to get away from him. I took one last look at Edward who was now speaking.

"Uh,…of course if you could just give me a second I need to finish talking to…," but before he could finish I turned and walked from the room. I didn't dare look back as I feared the look I would see on his face. I just continued walking, looking straight ahead. A million thoughts ran through my head. _Would he be happy that Dr Cooper interrupted our conversation too? Would he be happy that he didn't have to have an awkward and uncomfortable conversation with me?_ After all he did leave me because I was too plain and boring for him. The only reason that he probably wanted to talk was to tell me that he still didn't love me and that him being there didn't change anything. _Maybe he wouldn't be here long; maybe after he found out that I was here he would leave me again._ I mean, I wasn't good enough to make him stay the first time and if anything I was more pathetic than I was then. Thinking of him leaving again hurt me more than I would have liked. Luckily I had reached my destination, the female bathroom.

I opened the door and walked to the farthest stall. When I reached it I entered and quickly locked the door behind me. I banged my head against the door and crumpled to the ground. I brought my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them trying to keep myself together and stop the whole in my chest from becoming even bigger. But it was too late. Before I could even think about it my body was shaking hard with the sobs that were now escaping. All the pain that I had held inside over the four years was coming out. The pain of him leaving, the pain of him not being there to catch me, the pain of him being here now, the pain of him not being there to help with…with…, I stopped myself before I could finish that thought. There was no need to bring that up. That was over.

After what felt like an eternity of crying I finally composed myself. _"Get a grip Bella" _I growled angrily to myself _"Do you think Ed-...he is sitting in a toilet crying like a baby?"_ With that I got up and washed my face, trying to rid of all evidence of my crying. When I felt comfortable that no one would notice my tears, I looked in the mirror and put on the best smile I could. As always it looked fake but it was as good as it would get. I took a deep breath and walked to the door preparing myself for the tenuous day that lay ahead.

*~*~*

It was midday when I walked in too see my last patient before my lunch break. His name was Mr Lang; he was my favourite patient. No matter how bad a mood I was in, he always managed to make me smile a genuine smile. He reminded me a bit of Jacob. Not that they looked similar or acted the same, but I felt really comfortable around both of them. Occasionally when I had breaks I would come into Mr Lang's room and just hang out talking about random stuff. Usually I wouldn't become this attached to a patient but Mr Lang had no one else. His wife died a few years ago and his only child lived in Australia, which wasn't exactly close. I just couldn't let him remain alone with no one to talk to and help him through. I know how it feels to be alone, (albeit for different reasons) and I couldn't let another person feel like that, especially one as kind and caring as Mr Lang.

As I walked through Mr Lang's door I saw something I didn't expect. Or should I say someone. Standing at the end of Mr Lang's bed talking to him was Carlisle. I gasped in shock. In my haste to rid Edward from my mind I had completely forgotten that Jen and Mille had said there were _two_ new doctors, and that they were father and son. I felt idiotic for not remembering this earlier. Carlisle turned and looked at me a smile plastered on his face. He looked as gorgeous as ever, his eyes were a beautiful topaz and his hair was shiny and perfect. I couldn't help but smile back. I mean after all it wasn't his fault that his son didn't love me anymore. I could never be angry at Carlisle; he had done so much for me. Mr Lang saw Carlisles gaze and turned to me also, a smile spreading across his face.

"Hey Nurse Sexy come over here and give papa some loving," he said to me his mouth curving into a cheeky grin. I laughed out loud and walked over to him.

"I've told you before sir, its Nurse Hottie to you," I said coming to rest my hand on his arm, "and if I have to warn you one more time sir I'll have you reported for sexual harassment". He laughed at this and then turned back to Carlisle.

"So doc, this is the nurse I was telling you about." _Oh no, this can't be goo.,_ "She's a great kid I think you two would get along great." _Oh no, this definitely wasn't good. Is he trying to… to set me up… with Carlisle?_ Mr Lang turned to me and smiled_. Yes, yes that's exactly what he is trying to do._

"Bella, this is Dr Cullen, he's new I'm sure you've seen him around I thought maybe you two coul-," before he could finish I started laughing hysterically. I could hear Carlisle chuckling softly also. Mr Lang looked at the both of us curiously.

"What's so funny?" he asked his smile fading slightly. I tried to stop myself from laughing so I could explain the situation to him. About five minutes later I had finally composed myself and was taking in deep breaths to prevent the laughter coming back. I looked at Carlisle and smiled.

"Should I explain or do you want to?" I asked him as I took in his beauty again.

"You go ahead and explain it, Bella," Carlisle said, a warm smile spreading across his face. I turned back to Mr Lang whose face had now gone from curious to confused.

"You see Mr Lang," I started

"Please Bella I told you to call me Chris," he interrupted

"Ok, well you see Chris, Dr Cullen and I know each other from years back. He was pretty much family at one point, I was very close," I gulped before continuing, trying to keep the hurt and pain from my voice, "_friends _with his family. Carlisle was…is like a father to me." I turned to Carlisle and smiled, he smiled back but I could see traces of sadness in his face. He obviously felt bad for leaving. At least someone did. I looked back to Mr Lang and began speaking again.

"So you see it would be a bit awkward if we dated, especially since he is married as well," I said ending my explanation. Mr Lang smiled up at me looking a little embarrassed. He then turned to Carlisle.

"I'm sorry Dr Cullen, I didn't realise otherwise I would have never have tried to set you up. You can't blame a man for trying though, Bella here hasn't exactly had much luck with men so I thought I'd give her a helping hand," Mr Lang said. I blushed profusely and looked at the floor not daring to look up. I didn't want to see the disappointment, disapproval, or even worse the pity in Carlisle face.

"Of course Mr Lang, no harm done," Carlisle said kindly. There was a short silence before Carlisle spoke again.

"Well anyway I should get going I'll be back to check on you later Mr Lang". Before he left he came and put one arm around my shoulders and hugged me gently.

"It was good to see you again Bella," he whispered in my ear before turning and walking away.

"You too," I breathed softly when he was at the door. It was so soft that I knew only he could hear it. He turned and gave me one last smile before leaving through the door.

I took in a deep breath and sighed deeply. A solitary tear rolled down my face, I quickly wiped it away with my hand before Mr Lang could notice. It wasn't that I wasn't happy to see Carlisle. I was ecstatic. It's just that it was going to be that much harder and hurt that much more when they leave again. I just hoped that I didn't see any more Cullens today. I walked to the end of Mr Lang's bed. As I walked past I accidently knocked his chart to the ground. I bent down to pick it up. I was just about to put it back in its position when I read something unexpected. Mr Lang's doctor was a Dr Cullen, yes, but it was supposed to be Dr E. Cullen. I felt slightly relieved that he wasn't there, but at the same time I couldn't ignore the sadness and hurt that I felt. Had he seen my name on the board and asked Carlisle to take this patient for him so he wouldn't have to deal with me. I mean, it's not that I wanted to see or talk to him, but the fact that he didn't want to see me, hurt more than I could've imagined. It proved what I had known all along, he didn't love me anymore, he never loved me. My breathing became more rapid as the pain spread through my body. Suddenly this pain turned into something else. An emotion I rarely felt towards Edward, Anger!

I was angry at Edward for hurting me, for leaving me, and most of all I was angry at him for not loving me the way I loved him. And it wasn't just him I was angry at anymore. I was angry at Alice to. I was angry that she left, angry that she didn't warn me about Edward, angry that she never even said goodbye. "_Stupid vampires,"_ I thought to myself angrily. I clenched my fists and bit my lip to prevent from screaming out in anger. I turned to Mr Lang and composed my face the best I could. I didn't want him worrying about me unnecessarily.

"Uh Mr-I mean Chris I have to go but I'll be back later to check on you ok," he looked at me and smiled. _Wow maybe my acting was getting better._

"Ok Nurse Bella I'll see you later," he said to me. There was a hint of concern in his voice. _Ok so my acting wasn't getting any better, damn._ I smiled at him one last time before turning to leave the room. I walked to the cafeteria in a daze. I wasn't really that hungry so I just grabbed a fruit salad and water. When I had paid for my food I slowly walked over to my usual table and sat down. I put my elbows on the table and rested my head in my hands. I exhaled deeply, releasing all the air from my body. _Could this day get any worse?_ I thought feeling exhaustion creeping up on me.

"Can I join you?" a familiar tinkly voice asked. The answer to my question was yes. Yes my day could get worse and it did. I groaned and looked up to find Alice standing their. She smiled tentatively at me.

"Hey Bella," she breathed looking at me. She was a beautiful as ever; she still looked like an angel that had fallen from heaven. Everything about her was perfect. "Do you mind if I join you," she asked shyly. That was weird I had never seen Alice like that before; she was usually so bright and bubbly. Maybe she felt bad about leaving. _"Huh as if, she probably just feels sorry for you because you are so utterly pathetic," _I shouted. This brought back the anger that had been festering all day.

"Uh, actually I was just about to leave, they are expecting me back soon," I answered bitterly. I heard Alice breath out heavily. I looked away from her and started staring at a blank spot on the wall.

"Bella," she said softly. "You only just came to lunch, you haven't touched any of your food yet. Please will you just talk to me?" she continued sitting down across from me. She reached out to put her arm on my shoulder. But before she could I hit it away and stood up glaring at her.

"I don't feel like talking," I shouted viciously. "Not to you anyway," I added, whispering this part so only she could hear. I heard her sigh again before I left. I walked hastily towards the door, wanting to get out of this place as fast as I could. When I reached the doors I could've sworn I saw Edward standing in the corner of the cafeteria, but when I looked back there was no sign of him. _Ok I definitely have to get out of this hospital, it's making me crazy._ I walked to the nurse's station and saw Jen sitting there.

"Hey Jen," I said not even trying to put on a fake smile, "um, I'm not feeling well so I was going to go home, do you think you could cover for me?" I looked at her and she nodded smiling.

"Yeah of course Bella," she said giving me another smile before she turned to leave. I walked out the entrance to the hospital pulled out my phone and began dialling Jake's number.

Ring, Ring. He picked up the phone after the second ring.

"Bella?" he said concern dripping in his voice "what's wrong, are you ok, are you hurt?"

"No Jake, I'm fine…. well not fine, I'm not hurt I just… can you come pick me up. I'll explain later, ok. Can you please just come?" I said not even trying to hide the hurt and anger in my voice. Jake was already in the car, I could hear the acceleration of his car in the background.

"Yeah sure Bells, of course, I'll see you soon ok." I could hear he was worried about me.

"Yeah thanks Jake see you soon," I whispered back before hanging up the phone. I went to the curb and sat down. I pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my head on my knees trying to forget about today's events.

About two minutes later I heard Jakes car pull up in front of me. _Wow, when he said soon he really meant soon_. He jumped out of the car and ran up to me.

"Bella," he said stopping in front of me wrapping his arms around my body. I wrapped my arms around his waist pulling him closer.

"What's wrong," he whispered in my ear. I sighed and was about to talk when I felt his body stiffen.

"Jake," I said pulling away from him so I could look at his face. It looked confused, like he was trying to figure something out. "Jake what's wrong?"

"Um Bella, why do you smell like…like vampire?" He queried. I could see that he was trying not to get angry.

"Well Jake that's kinda what I wanted to talk to you about?" I whispered softly. I looked up at his face. He didn't speak but his eyes urged me to continue. I exhaled deeply before continuing.

"Ok well they're sorta here," I said softly, "the… the cul-," but I didn't have to explain any further. Jake clearly understood.

"THEY'RE WHAT," Jake yelled. His body was shaking now. He was clenching his fists to stop himself from phasing. I put my hands on his arms trying to calm him down.

"Jake calm down it's no big deal, I only talked to Carlisle, I didn't speak to…to him," I muttered softly.

"IT IS A BIG DEAL BELLA," he spat loudly, "they can't just come back into your life after all this time, it's not fair," he continued lowering his voice slightly for the last part. I could feel his eyes watching my face for my reaction.

"I know that Jake," I hissed angrily, "but it's not like I can do anything, it's not like I can go up-…."

"I can do something," Jake growled and walked around me heading towards the hospital. _Oh great so he wants to fight in public_. I groaned in frustration, _"Stupid stubborn werewolf"_ I thought angrily as I turned and began running after him

*~*~*

**Anyway I hope you liked it. I'm not sure if I do or not. **

**What will happen? Will Jake fight Edward or will Bella be able to calm him down? Review and you'll find out sooner. **

**Anyway I was thinking. I have 4 reviews atm, so if I get to a total of 15 I'll update in two or three days. If I get more than a total of 15 I'll update tonite or tomorrow. If I get under 15 in total you'll get an update late next week sometime.**

**Anyway pls, pls review. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys thanx so much for reviewing they were great. They made me so happy. So as promised here is the next chapter. I hope u enjoy it. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

"JAKE," I yelled speeding up so I could catch up to him. I finally caught up to him. He didn't look at me he just kept his eyes straight ahead and kept walking. I had to jog to keep up with his fast pace.

"Jake," I said again slightly breathless from the running. He still didn't stop.

"Jake come on, be realistic, please can we just go home?" He still didn't stop. I groaned in frustration.

"JACOB BLACK!" I shouted angrily grabbing hold of one of his arms "WILL YOU PLEASE JUST STOP AND LISTEN TO ME FOR ONE SECOND". He stopped and turned to me but focused his eyes on the tree behind me. I could see that he was still angry and it would take some convincing to calm him down.

"Thankyou," I breathed, "now come on be serious, what were you planning to do? Phase in the middle of the hospital?" I saw him relax a bit and he looked down at me. He groaned in defeat.

"Why are you always right?" he questioned. I shrugged and smiled.

"I don't know I was just born that way," he laughed and we began to turn but before we could I saw Jacob stiffen again. _Great what now?_ I looked up at his face. He was glaring at the hospital. I followed his gaze and standing at the entrance to the hospital were Alice and Edward. Great, they always seemed to have excellent timing.

Jake and Edward were glaring at each other. You know the saying if looks could kill, well if that were true, both of them would be lying on the ground right now. I could understand Jakes anger towards Edward, but I couldn't understand Edwards anger towards Jake. Jake had never done anything to him and unlike Edward Jake would never leave me. I looked between the two a few more times before looking at Alice. She, like me, was looking between the two. She had a look of confusion on her face. I wondered what that was about. I'd never seen Alice look that confused before, it was weird. From the corner of my eye I saw Edward turn his head, tearing his gaze from Jacob. His face became pained and he looked at me with pain and hurt in his eyes. Ok things just got weirder, what the hell was with that. I turned to look at Jacob who was now smiling wickedly. He put an arm around my shoulder.

"Come on Bells let's go," he grinned yanking me towards his car. I looked back at Edward and Alice who were now both staring at us angrily. My gaze locked with Edwards momentarily, before I turned my head away. Jacob opened the door for me and helped me get in to my seat. He ran over to his side and strapped himself in quickly. I took one last look at where they were before the car sped away but they were already gone and before I knew it so were we.

Jacob was driving like a maniac so we reached our house in fifteen minutes instead of the usual thirty. I loved this house. It wasn't extravagant or anything, it was simple. It was pretty isolated with the closest neighbour being a few hundred metres away. It had bush on both sides and the back. This was a requirement because Jake needed somewhere he could phase and run around without being detected. The house looked fairly small from the outside but when you walked inside you realised it was actually pretty spacious. It was pretty much your average house except it had a porch that extended out the front. I sat out there most nights just thinking and looking at the stars, Jacob would join me occasionally but he couldn't understand what was so fascinating about stars. We had never planted any flowers or anything because there were wild flowers growing along the porch. They were really beautiful and because they were wild we never had to look after them or anything, which was good considering how clumsy I am. The house was painted a beautiful blue. Suddenly Edward popped into my head. His favourite colour on me was blue. I sighed, great now I was reminded of Edward at home as well. I was pulled from my thoughts when Jake spoke.

"Hey Bells, let's go inside," he said softly. I looked at him and could see that all the happiness he felt before was now gone. He had a worried look on his face. I must have been sitting there for a while to get him that worried. I smiled at him and nodded, opening my door. We walked side by side to the door. He unlocked it and we both walked through. As we walked in I looked at the time, it was 2 o'clock. Wow it was later than I thought. I walked to the couch and collapsed letting the exhaustion wash over me. Jake came and sat at the end of the couch. He looked down at me and exhaled deeply.

"Ok Bells, now talk," he said softly. I opened my mouth to tell him I was fine but he must have seen it in my face, "and don't you dare try and bullshit me by saying your fine" he added a hint of anger and frustration rising. I sighed in defeat and looked up at him.

"Fine, but you can't freak out about anything ok. You have to promise that you'll stay calm," I said sharply. He nodded.

I began by telling him about the dream I had this morning. I then continued, re-living the events of today. When I finished I looked up at Jakes face, I could see that he was trying to stay composed but the anger was seeping through. He was clenching his jaw and his fists were curled into balls. I looked at the clock it was now 3 pm. I stood up.

"Um… I'm going to go have a shower, ok," I said standing up.

"Bells wait," Jake said all anger now gone. He took two steps so that he was standing in front of me. He put both his arms around me and pulled me against his chest. "I promise I won't let anything….. or anyone hurt you again". I knew that by anyone he meant Edward. Surprisingly this comforted me, I actually did feel a bit better about it after talking to Jake. I looked at him and smiled before turning and walking to the bathroom. I closed the door behind me and started slowly taking my clothes off. I stepped in the shower and turned on the tap letting the warm water wash over me, releasing all the tension from my muscles. I took out my strawberry shampoo and put it in my hair. The scent filled the shower helping me to calm down.

After I felt completely relaxed I turned off the shower and stepped into the cold and grabbed my towel. When I had completely dried myself I got dressed in a pair of sweats and an oversized shirt that was more like a dress on me. When I walked out I saw Jacob sitting at the table. He was on the phone. Oh no this couldn't be good. Please don't tell me he called my dad, he would completely freak out about this. Jake turned and looked at me.

"Ok, yeah Charlie I'll talk to you later. Yeah I'll tell her. Bye," he said hanging up the phone. Crap, he did call my dad. I glared at him. He looked away looking slightly guilty.

"So uh…. that was your dad," he said softly. I continued to glare at him.

"Yeah, so I heard," I hissed. "Please don't tell me you called him and told him about Edward". Jake didn't answer.

"Jake?" he turned and looked at me.

"I didn't," he said softly.

"Don't lie to me Jake," I growled back angrily folding my arms across my chest.

"I'm not lying, I swear I didn't call him. He called me," he said rubbing his hand through his hair, which was short.

"So did you tell him about Edward?" I asked walking over to him. I stood on the other side of the table and rested my hands on top of one of the chairs. Jake nodded.

"Yeah, I did, I'm sorry he was just worried about you. He deserves to know Bells" he said. I sat down.

"What did he say?" I enquired, hoping that Charlie wasn't going to do anything too extreme.

"Uh…. well…um actually he is kinda coming here. He said he would be here tomorrow" Jake said reluctantly

"Jake," I sighed. This was completely unnecessary. "I'm a grown woman I don't need my daddy coming here to fight my battles for me". Jake smiled at me apologetically.

"I know Bells I tried to convince him not to come but you now how stubborn he is." I sighed. I did know how stubborn he was, that's where I got my stubbornness from. It was no use trying to convince him not to come now.

"I'm going to go read" I looked at the clock it was now 4:00 pm "I'll be out to make dinner later ok?" Jake nodded and I walked to my room closing the door behind me. I walked over to my bed and fell onto it. I closed my eyes deciding to rest them for a little while.

When I opened my eyes it was dark. I rolled over and looked at my alarm clock; it said it was now 9 o'clock. So much for only resting my eyes. I had been sleeping for 5 hours. Crap, I told Jake I was going to make dinner. I jumped up quickly and ran to the kitchen. I saw Jake lying on the couch in the lounge room.

"I'm so sorry," I called loudly opening the fridge looking for something that I could cook. Jake laughed.

"It's cool Bells you looked so peaceful and I didn't want to wake you so I ordered pizza". I exhaled deeply, relieved that I didn't have to cook. I wasn't really in a cooking mood.

"Ok" I said walking into the lounge room. "I walked and sat on the floor next to the couch, "what are we watching?" I asked looking at the TV.

"Um some cop show, it's pretty lame," I opened my mouth to ask what it was called but before I could the phone rang. Jake got up and ran to answer it.

"Hello" he said into the receiver. "Hello," he said again. He hung up the phone and walked over to me mumbling to himself.

"Who was it?" I asked curiously.

"I don't know there was no one there," he replied angrily. This confused me.

"That's weird, it's probably just prank callers," I said. Jake shook his head.

"No it's not prank callers, whoever it is has called like six times in the past hour. It's the same thing every time, it rings, I answer, they wait a couple of seconds and then hang up. I swear if I find out who it is I'll rip their head off," Jake growled angrily. Suddenly the phone rang again. Jake started to get up but I stopped him.

"No don't worry, I'll get it," I said standing up and running over to the phone.

"Hello" I said politely. They didn't answer. After a few more seconds I spoke again "Hello is anyone there?" I asked. I heard somebody breathing softly on the other end, I could have sworn it was,… was…but before I could be sure the person hung up and all I could hear on the other end was the dial tone. I hung up the phone and walked back to Jake sitting on the floor near his head.

"That is weird" I muttered. Jake nodded. I shrugged. We sat up for a while longer and watched the cop show. Jake was right it was incredibly lame. We just sat their laughing at the ridiculous antics and quoting lame lines. When I realised it was 11 o'clock I decided that I had better go to bed so I could get up for work tomorrow. Oh great work tomorrow, that should be fun. I put that thought to the back of mind, not wanting to be kept awake worrying about it. I hugged Jake and headed to my bedroom. I jumped in bed and pulled the covers over me. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was asleep, dead to the world.

*~*~*

**Ok I know that chapter wasn't very eventful but I thought it was necessary for Bella to have a break from all the drama, but don't worry the drama will start again soon. I hoped you liked it.**

**Anyway so I was thinking of doing the next chapter in Edwards POV, so you guys can know what was going on in his head throughout the day. What do you think? Let me know in the reviews. If you don't want it I won't do it.**

**So you know the deal the more the reviews I get the faster I'll update so pls, pls review.**

**O btw happy birthday ****jaz-lil-bai. Here's your early b'day present**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: So I decided to do EPOV of the day so you could get an insight into what Edward was thinking. Also I think it might answer some of the questions that you guys have. **

**I didn't get the amount of reviews that I wanted for this chapter but I really wanted to post it so yeah. You should feel privileged lol, not really. Anyway hope u enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

_Flashback_

"_Bella I don't want you to come with me," I spoke slowly and precisely. I made sure my face was blank and my eyes were cold so they were free from the hurt I was feeling. I watched her face as she absorbed what I was really saying._

_I waited watching her face as she thought through what was happening. I yearned to reach out and touch her face, but I knew I couldn't. I had to leave so she could live a normal human life._

"_You…don't…want me?" she asked. I was having an internal battle in my head. The selfish part shouted at me to tell her I did want her, it told me to take her into my arms now and never let go. The responsible part of my head told me to continue on with the lie, it shouted at me to let her go so she could live a safe, normal life. Bella's safety was the most important thing to me so the responsible part won._

"_No" I replied. I could feel my dead heart breaking in my chest. Saying that I didn't want Bella was worse than lying. It was more like…like blasphemy. I just hoped she believed it. That was unlikely though. Knowing Bella she would probably argue with me for hours saying I was lying and that I was just saying this. I kept my eyes blank and unapologetic, convincing her to believe what I was saying. Deep down I prayed that she didn't._

_Bella stared into my eyes. I saw her face sadden a bit._

"_Well, that changes things," she said sounding calm and reasonable. I could see that she was becoming numb, zombie like. She was starting to believe what I was saying. This tore my heart apart even more._

_End of Flashback _

I was pulled from this nightmarish memory when I heard a light tap on my door. I ignored it. I was too busy to find out who it was and what they wanted. I was too busy watching images flash across my mind. Images of Bella's face when I told her I didn't want her, images of her face when I told her she was no good for me. I could remember the feel of her warm forehead against my lips when I kissed her for the last time, the last time I touched her, the last time I gazed into her beautiful chocolate eyes. My heart broke again as I re-lived the worst day of my life for what felt like the fiftieth time tonight.

I heard another light knock on the door. I sat and listened to the thoughts of the person who stood on the other side. _"Edward I know you're listening so either you come and unlock the door or I kick it down and you know Esme won't be happy if I do that,"_ Alice thought smugly. I got up, opened the door and then ran back and sat on the black couch.

"What do you want Alice?" I asked not even trying to pretend to be interested. She glared at me but then smiled. That's odd.

"Well, I've decided that you can't be all mopey anymore. It's time for you to cheer up." She grinned at me.

"Ok Alice sure thing," I spat back sarcastically.

"Come on Edward you're starting a new job today who knows maybe you'll make friends," she said. She had clearly had a vision and knew something I didn't. I tried to look in her head and find out what it was but she was translating the bible from English to Latin.

"Ok Alice why the hell are you translating the bible. What do you know?" I questioned my voice sharp.

"Well would you look at the time," she said looking at the clock "I have to get going and I'm pretty sure Carlisle wants to leave soon". She turned and walked out of the door.

I turned and looked at the clock, it was 4:20 am. She was right we had to leave in five minutes. I went to my closet and grabbed a pair of nice pants and a slightly dressy shirt. It was best to dress to impress on the first day. It was my, and Carlisles, first day at Seattle Grace Hospital. I was sick of the whole high school scene so I begged for Carlisle to let me apply for a job at a hospital with him. Being a doctor would help to keep my mind off of Bella, as it would allow me to be busy. If I were at high school I would be constantly reminded of my loss. I think Carlisle wanted me to stop moping in my room all day so he agreed.

We applied to a few places but none of them had room for two new doctors. Seattle Grace heard about_, the_ Dr Carlisle Cullen and his son looking for work so they called and offered us both jobs. I was reluctant to accept at first, due to Seattle being so close to Forks, but it was our only real option so I had to agree. I glanced at the alarm clock and saw that it was now time to leave. I sprinted down the stairs and called Carlisle. He was at my side in a second and we both walked out to his brand new black Mercedes. I looked up at the sky before hopping into the passenger seat. It was cloudy and it looked like it was going to be like that for a while. I smiled this meant that we wouldn't have to hide away anytime soon. I hopped in my seat and closed the door softly. Carlisle then accelerated leaving the house behind us.

*~*~*

The first hour or so was pretty uneventful. I had a brief tour of the hospital. I mainly got shown around the ICU because that was the ward that I would be working on. After being shown around I went and checked on my patients, introducing myself if they were awake. As I was checking one of my patients I heard a voice come over the loud speaker.

"_Code Blue ICU, Code Blue ICU". _I ran out of the room I was in and ran up the corridor at human pace. It was rather frustrating considering I would've been there by now if I could run at my normal pace. I looked up and saw a few nurses running into the next room. "_Finally,"_ I breathed to myself. I entered the room and saw a bunch of nurses trying to resuscitate a patient. There was no doctor there. _"Looks like you're in charge, Edward,"_ I thought becoming slightly pleased that I got to prove myself so soon. I ran to the side of the bed and began taking charge. I told the nurses what to do and they followed my orders quickly and efficiently. I blocked out all the thoughts of the nurses wanting to focus on saving the guy lying in front of me. I smelt something familiar but I ignored it giving my full attention to saving this guys life.

After a couple minutes I heard the patient's heart rate pick up and his breathing became steady. I sighed in relief. The patient was stable. I pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and finger closing my eyes. That was intense. I exhaled deeply once more and then turned to the nurses.

"Good work everyone," I said looking at them. I now realised that there were three nurses in the room with me. They were all female. I looked at the first two and gave them a smile. Their hearts accelerated and I heard all types of… inappropriate thoughts cross their mind. I smiled at what was going through their heads and turned to the last nurse. I heard her gasp and I froze.

It was Bella. There standing in front of me was the only person that I would ever love. My Bella. I stared at her face intently taking in every little thing. She looked pretty much exactly the same as she did four years ago. She was still the most exquisite thing I had ever seen. I inhaled deeply.

"Ed-Edward," she stuttered. I looked down and saw that she was clenching both hands into fists. _Doesn't look like she's very happy to see me_. That thought hurt a lot. I grimaced but quickly composed my face so that the only emotion that showed was surprise. I looked back up at her and rested my gaze on her eyes. I stood there for a about a minute just staring into her chocolate brown eyes. I watched as a whole range of emotions crossed her face. Surprise, confusion, curiosity, hurt and…was that anger. Suddenly she closed her eyes. _What is she doing?_ I thought curiously. I then saw her raise her hand and pinch herself on the arm. _Oh she thinks this is a dream_. I didn't know if this was a good or bad thing, it could be both. I waited patiently for her to open her eyes. During that time I decided that I was going to talk to her. I didn't know what I was going to say or how she would react but I did know that as soon as she opened her eyes I would speak to her.

A couple seconds later she opened her eyes and gasped again. I gazed at her watching her think the whole situation through. Her face was down and she was staring at the floor. I desperately wanted to look into her eyes again so I decided that I had to speak to her now.

"Bella," I breathed softly so only she could hear. She inhaled deeply and reluctantly looked up at me. I could feel that surprise was clearly etched on my face. I worked hard to make sure no other emotion came through. I didn't want to scare her. I gazed into her eyes and she gazed back into mine. This moment was so intense that I felt my mask start to slip away. Bella's breathing became faster and her heart started beating more rapidly. _"Is that good?"_ I asked myself, desperately hoping that it meant that she still had feelings for me. I was about to ask her but then the silence was interrupted. I heard the thoughts of someone invade the intense moment and my mask returned. I was happy to ignore the person but then they spoke. I growled internally at the person for interrupting us.

"Ah Dr Cullen, just the man I was looking for," I now recognised the person to be Dr Cooper, the chief of the hospital, "if you have a moment I was wondering if we could speak". _Why?_ I screamed in my head, cursing Dr Cooper. I stared at Bella for a few more seconds before tearing my eyes away and giving Dr Cooper a fake smile. I heard Bella's breathing return to normal and her heart return to a normal rate.

"Uh…Of course if you could just give me a second I need to finish talking to…," I started, but before I could finish Bella turned and left the room. _"No!"_ I screamed in my head, _"come back"_. I longed to run after her but I didn't want to give Dr Cooper the wrong impression. For a moment I succumbed to the grief I felt. It hurt so much to see her walk away from me. I guess that answered my question about her feelings towards me. She definitely didn't feel anything anymore. This ripped my unbeating heart to shreds. I still loved her so much. But this is why I left. I left so that she could forget about me and live a happy normal life. This is what I wanted. So why did it hurt so much. I locked all these feeling away for now and smiled at Dr Cooper again.

"So where did you want to talk," I asked trying my best to sound interested as well as cheerful. Apparently it worked. Dr Cooper smiled warmly back at me.

"My office, it's fairly close," he said gesturing for me to follow him. I obliged.

The rest of the conversation passed in a blur. My mind was too busy thinking about Bella. I made sure to answer direct questions and I mmed and aaahed in appropriate places, but I had no idea what he was actually talking about. I was relieved when he had finished.

"Anyway Edward I'll let you get back to work," I stood up. "Oh and great work this morning," he said patting me lightly on the shoulder.

"Thanks," I smiled, "I can't take all the credit though the nursing staff did a great job, especially uh… Nurse Swan". He smiled and I turned and left the room. I desperately wanted to look for Bella but I had no idea where to start, so instead I ran to see Carlisle who was in his office. Because he was so well known and respected, the board of Seattle Grace offered him a job as the Head of the ICU. This meant that he was in charge of all the doctors on this ward. As well as a huge salary he got his own office. I ran into the office and slammed the door shut behind me. Carlisle looked up concern etched on his face. _"What's the matter?"_ I heard him ask in his head. I sighed and sat down on the chair opposite him.

"Bella," I breathed softly. I heard his thoughts become worried. I blocked them out. Carlisle then spoke.

"What about her?" he asked concern in his voice, "does this place remind you too much of her. I was worried that might happen"

"Yes it does remind me of her, but not because of the reasons you think. She's here Carlisle. She's in Seattle. She's in this hospital. She's a nurse here," I said slowly. Carlisle face became shocked. I listened to his thoughts _"How did we not see this earlier,"_ he queried. That was a good point, how did we not foresee this. Why hadn't Alice seen this coming? If I knew Bella was working here I would have never accepted the job. I had promised her that she would never see me again, that I would never interfere with her life again. And here I was breaking my promise. I knew what I had to do but the question was could I bring myself to do it. Could I bring myself to leave Bella again? Carlisle was staring at me trying to figure out what was going through my head.

"Edward?" he asked slowly, "are you completely sure that Bella is here?" I became frustrated at this.

"Of course I'm sure Carlisle, she was standing right in front of me. I'm not crazy," I hissed angrily. Carlisle nodded.

"Ok son," he said softly. I got up to leave but he stopped me.

"Edward I think you should stay in here for a while. You are in no condition to work." I opened my mouth to argue but he put his hand up and stopped me.

"Edward you know as well as I do what happens when your mind isn't one hundred per cent on the job. What would happen if a patient started to bleed when you're in such a state?" I groaned in frustration. I didn't want to be stuck in here but I knew he was right.

"Ok, I'll stay," I breathed. With that Carlisle left closing the door softly behind him. I groaned again. _What am I supposed to do in here?_ I tried to keep my mind clear but failed horribly. Images of Bella flashed across my mind. Images of the day I first saw her, the day I first talked to her, the day at the meadow, the first time I kissed her. All the happy memories were quickly replaced by an image of her face as I told her I didn't want her. I took a deep breath and remembered what she looked like this morning when I saw her. She still looked just as beautiful as she did four years ago yet there was something different about her. Her eyes seemed to have lost all happiness and hope. What was left of my dead heart shattered and I closed my eyes. Suddenly these thoughts left my mind and were replaced by the conversation I had with Alice this morning.

"_I've decided that you can't be all mopey anymore. It's time for you to cheer up."_ I heard her tinkly voice say in my head, _"maybe you'll make friends,"_ I heard her say. I remembered trying to look in her head to see what was going on but she was translating the bible to Latin. Suddenly a wave of anger coursed through me. Alice knew that Bella was here. She had seen her. She had seen her and she didn't warn me. I clenched my fists and tried to calm myself down, but before I could I heard the door open. I turned to see who it was and I growled in anger jumping up out of my seat.

It was Alice. I took a few deep breaths trying to keep myself calm so I wouldn't attack my sister. After a couple of minutes I was completely calm and I walked back to the seat I was in before and slowly sat down.

"Hey Edward," she said once she knew that I wasn't going to rip her arms off.

"Why didn't you tell me Alice," I hissed angrily. "You know I never would have accepted this job if I knew Bella lived in Seattle". Alice looked annoyed.

"Edward I didn't know she lived in Seattle… well not really. In my vision this morning I only saw that you would see her at work today, I didn't know she actually lived here," she said softly. Oh so that was the reason she was annoyed. She was annoyed that she didn't see this sooner.

"Ok, so why didn't you tell me that I would be seeing her today?" I questioned keeping my voice as steady as possible.

"Because I knew that you wouldn't come to work and you would try to make us move," she hissed angrily. "You're not the only one that misses her Edward, we all do. Even Rosalie, though she would never admit it. Why can't you just let yourself be happy?"

"She doesn't belong in our world Alice. I can't let her get hurt because of what we are. I won't let her get hurt just so I can be happy."

"In case you haven't noticed Edward she is hurting. She's hurting because we left her. You're hurting because you left her. Our whole family is hurting. I won't let you screw things up again." I opened my mouth to argue. She glanced at the clock and then interrupted me before I could say anything.

"Bella's on her lunch break now I'm going to go see her. Unlike you I'm not a coward."

"Alice stay out of it," I growled angrily.

"No Edward I won't. The last time I listened to you it broke our family. You didn't even let me say goodbye to her Edward. She was… is my best friend and I couldn't even say goodbye to her," she whispered sadly. I looked up at her.

"Ali-," I begun

"Edward I'm going to see her and you can't stop me," she growled interrupting me. She glared at me angrily and then walked out leaving me alone. I sat for a little while thinking about what I should do. _Should I go with Alice now and see Bella or should I leave_. After a minute or so I had figured out what I was going to do.

*~*~*

**I hoped you enjoyed the trip into Edwards head. The next chapter will be in his POV as well but chapter 6 will go back to Bella's. Anyway I hoped you liked it.**

**Ok so if I get 10-15 reviews for this chapter I'll update tonite or tomorrow. If not I won't update for like a week. Honestly reviews make me want to write faster. So pls, pls review.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:Hey guys thanx so much for reviewing. They all made me so happy So as promised here is the next chapter. I hope you enjoy it.**

**This chapter is in Edward's POV again because I needed to finish the day off, but don't worry the next chapter will be in Bella's POV. Anyway stop reading this Authors Note and start the chapter. **

**Go on! Haha lol joking. Anyway again I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

I decided to go with Alice to see Bella. I had to see her again. I ran out of the office and headed up the corridor towards Alice

"Alice," I called running at human pace to catch up to her. She turned and smiled at me.

"I knew you would come through," she said happily. I frowned.

"Alice I haven't _come through._ I still think we should leave and let her live a normal life. I just,… I just… wanted,…I had… to see her again." I said sadness crossing my face. Alice frowned at me

"Ok well let's go," she whispered, softly grabbing my arm. We walked at human pace which was incredibly frustrating. I wanted to see Bella immediately. We finally reached the doors of the cafeteria. I paused for a second in front of the doors succumbing to the nervousness and fear that I felt. I felt Alice's gaze on my face. I inhaled deeply and opened the door. We both scanned the room looking for Bella. At first I thought she wasn't there, but then my eyes rested on a beautiful girl sitting at a table that was on the other side of the cafeteria. It was Bella. She was sitting there, her elbows on the table resting her head in her hands. I sighed. I wanted so badly to run over to her, take her in my arms and touch my lips softly to hers, but I knew that she didn't want that. Alice interrupted my internal battle.

"Um Edward I think that I should go by myself," she whispered. I nodded.

"Yeah I think you're right Alice". She gave me a smile and walked slowly towards where Bella was sitting. I ran to the corner of the cafeteria so I could watch without Bella seeing me. I watched as Alice spoke to her, I wasn't listening to what either of them was saying. I was just staring at Bella's face watching as different emotions crossed it. Surprise, shock, sadness, anger. _Oh no._

Suddenly Bella hit away Alice's hand and stood up glaring at her.

"I DON'T FEEL LIKE TALKING," she shouted at Alice, "not to you anyway," she added more softly. I'm sure Alice and I were the only ones who heard it. "_If this is how she reacts to Alice what chance do I have"_, I thought sadly. Bella was now walking towards the cafeteria doors. When she arrived at the doors I felt her look at me. But before she could turn back I was gone. I ran as fast as I could to the entrance of the hospital. Luckily for me the corridor I ran through was empty so nobody could see me. When I reached the car park I turned and ran to the side of the hospital so I wouldn't be seen by anyone. I sat on the ground, exhausted. I pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and finger, closing my eyes. After seeing that I knew that I had to leave. I couldn't stay and hurt Bella anymore. After a few minutes I felt somebody sit down next to me. I exhaled and turned to look at her opening my eyes.

"Alice," I breathed, "we have to leave, she doesn't want us here. We are,… I am just making things worse for her. I can't watch her hurt because of me."

"Edward. Honestly how did you expect her to react?" Alice whispered. "I mean I didn't say goodbye to her before I left. I would be angry if it was me too… plus I don't think that anger was just intended for me."

"I know Alice that's my point, she doesn't want me here…. She clearly doesn't have feelings for me anymore."

"Edward, don't be ridiculous she's just hurting. You have to understand that. She still wants you. She just has her guard up because you hurt her badly when you left. I mean you did tell her that you didn't want her." I looked at her in shock.

"I never… told you I said that…. How did you know that's what I said?" I asked in a whisper. She smiled and stood up.

"Please Edward I know everything." I chuckled and stood up also. As I did so I heard somebody start shouting near the car park.

"THEY'RE WHAT?" the voice yelled. It was clearly a male voice. Alice and I both ran and peeked around the wall to see what was going on. We saw a Native American boy standing there yelling at a girl with chocolate brown hair. The boys' body was shaking and his fists were clenched. The girl put her arms on the boy, my guess was that she did so to calm him.

"Jake calm down its no big deal, I only talked to Carlisle, I didn't speak to…to him," a familiar voice muttered. I looked more closely at the girl, it was Bella. I then turned to the boy and recognised that it was Jacob Black. I took in the scene before me. Suddenly an emotion that I hadn't felt for what seemed like an eternity coursed through my veins, jealousy. My Bella was touching someone that wasn't me. A low growl escaped my lips and I wanted to run over there and crush Jacob. _How dare he yell at Bella_. Luckily Alice had hold of my arm so I wasn't going anywhere.

"IT IS A BIG DEAL BELLA," Jacob spat loudly, "they can't just come back into your life after all this time, it's not fair". _Wait a minute who are they talking about. Are they talking about us?_ Before I could consider that any further Bella spoke again. I listened carefully.

"I know that Jake," she hissed angrily, "but it's not like I can do anything, it's not like I can go up-...."

"I can do something," Jacob growled and walked around Bella heading towards the hospital entrance. I watched as he walked away from Bella. I then turned my head as Bella groaned, she ran after Jacob. _What did he mean he could do something?_

"JAKE," Bella yelled speeding up her run. She finally caught up to him but he didn't look at her.

"Jake," she said again slightly breathless. He still didn't stop

"Jake come on, be realistic, please can we just go home?" she said. He still didn't stop. I heard her groan in frustration and watched as her face became angry. I wanted to hit him for ignoring her.

"JACOB BLACK," she shouted angrily grabbing hold of one of his arms. "WILL YOU PLEASE JUST STOP AND LISTEN TO ME FOR ONE SECOND." He stopped and turned to her.

"Thankyou," she breathed, "now come on be serious, what were you planning to do? Phase in the middle of the hospital?" _Wait what. Did she just say phase?_ I had been too focused on Bella before to look into Jacobs head. I did so and his thoughts were screaming. I watched as he imagined a big rust coloured wolf rip me to shreds. I growled. Bella was friends with a WEREWOLF. I left Bella so she would be safe, but she managed to go and find the one thing that was more dangerous than me. Another growl ripped through me. If Jacob wanted a fight I would give him one. But that wasn't what he wanted not anymore. His thoughts were sad now. _"Damn she's right," _he thought in his head._ "Ah well there will be plenty of time to kill Cullen," _he added angrily. _"But just not now,"_ he thought sadly.

Jacob looked down at Bella and groaned in defeat.

"Why are you always right?" he questioned. Bella shrugged and smiled.

"I don't know I was just born that way," she said smiling still. Her smile looked genuine, it was nice to see her happy. I wished that it was me that was making her smile. Jacob and Bella both turned to leave. Alice and I left our hiding place, heading for the entrance of the hospital. We had to tell Carlisle about the whole _"werewolf"_ situation. I turned to look at Bella before I went inside and noticed that Jacob was glaring at me. I glared back wishing that I could go over there and tear him apart. I looked in his head and realised that he was wishing for the same thing. We stood like that for a few minutes. I could feel Alice and Bella looking between us. _"Edward what the hell is going on?"_ Alice shouted at me in her head. I didn't answer her I was too busy glaring Jacob_._ Suddenly Jacobs thoughts changed. He was no longer thinking of ripping me apart. He was now thinking of a girl lying broken on a forest floor. It was Bella. I then watched as he thought of her getting out of her truck and walking towards him. Her face was broken, there was no trace of hope or joy left. There was just pain, hurt and despair. I recognised that these were memories of when I left Bella four years ago. I tore my eyes from Jacob and blocked his thoughts, I couldn't take it anymore. I felt my face crumple in pain and I looked up at Bella. She looked confused and turned to Jacob.

"Come on Bells let's go," Jacob said smugly pulling her towards his car. I watched them walk away. Jacob had his arm around Bella's shoulder. Jealousy washed over me again and I snarled.

"Edward what the hell is going on?" Alice asked sounding annoyed.

"Werewolf," was I all I managed to say. Alice must have understood because she gasped and turned to stare at Jacob and Bella. Bella turned to look at us again, her gaze momentarily locked with mine but then she turned away and got into the car. I sighed.

"I've got to go," I breathed to Alice. "I'll see you at home later."

"Ok," she whispered and then we both ran in different directions.

*~*~*

I ran and ran trying to clear my mind. When I finally stopped I realised that it was starting to get dark. I thought about my family. They would be worried about me, especially Esme. I sighed and then turned around and started running to my house. I refused to call it home. My only home was in Forks and that wouldn't change. It only took about ten minutes to get there. I ran up to the big white house. It was actually pretty similar to the one in Forks. As I approached the door I could hear all their thoughts. They were all worried about me, even Rosalie. _Wow that's unusual._ I opened the door and looked around but couldn't see them anywhere. I listened to their thoughts and found that they were in the dining room. I walked in to see them sitting around the dining table. They all looked up at me. Worry, confusion and annoyance in their faces. I walked over and took a seat next to Alice.

"Hey," I breathed softly, "so I guess you've all heard about Bella?" I looked up and they all nodded.

"Ok so when do we leave," I asked looking at Carlisle. All of them except Esme and Carlisle groaned. They all started swearing at me in their heads, calling me pretty much every name in the English language, as well as some in other languages.

"Come on guys," I pleaded, "we've discussed this before Bella doesn't belong in our world". They groaned again, "it's the only way to keep her from getting hurt…. It's the only way to keep her safe," I added.

"Yeah because being friends with a werewolf is safe," Alice mumbled beside me.

"WHAT," they all shouted. Even Carlisle and Esme were shocked. I glared at Alice she just smiled innocently.

"Yeah great job keeping her safe bro," Emmett said sarcastically. That hurt. I growled in anger and stood up. Emmett stood up as well and glared at me. Suddenly I felt a wave of calm wash over me and sat down, Emmett did the same. I turned and glared at Jasper.

"What?" he asked acting innocent.

"You guys didn't see her today ok she doesn't want us here,… well she doesn't want me here. As much as I hate her being friends with a werewolf there's not much we can do. We can't stay it will only hurt her". I heard Rosalie sigh sounding exasperated.

"Oh come on Edward be serious. You can't honestly think that us leaving again is what's best for her. She's friends with a werewolf for heavens sake. Even I'm worri-," but she stopped. Everyone stared at Rosalie in shock. She looked panicked.

"Uh,…um,… well,… what I meant to say was I like it here and I don't want to move _again,_" she said trying to erase the concern she just showed. _Wow, well that was unexpected Rosalie actually cares for someone other than herself_. It was silent for a moment and then Emmett broke the silence.

"I'm staying," Emmett said

"Me too," Rosalie added.

"Same here," Alice grinned

"Yeah I'm staying too," Jasper said. I felt them all staring at me.

"So what's it gonna be bro?" Emmett asked. I turned and looked at Esme and Carlisle they both nodded at me.

"Fine, I'll stay," I breathed quietly. They all cheered. I got up and ran to my room locking the door behind me. I walked over to my couch and lay down. All the events of today passed through my head over an over. Suddenly I felt the overwhelming need to hear her voice. So I ran downstairs and started searching for her number. It didn't take me long to get it. Having a lot of money comes in handy occasionally. I looked at the clock, it was 8pm. She should still be awake. So I ran up to my room locking the door again. I ran to the little table next to the couch and picked up my phone. I dialled the number and waited patiently for Bella to pick up. After the fourth ring I heard a man's voice answer.

"Hello," they said. _Wait had I dialled the wrong number._ "Hello," the voice said again. I recognised the voice this time. It was Jacob Black. I hung up quickly. A snarl broke through my lips. Bella wasn't only friends with a werewolf, she lived with one. _Does that mean… Does that mean Bella's moved on? I questioned silently._ A tearless sob broke through my lips as I thought this over. It hurt so much to think of Bella with someone else. The fact that Jacob was a werewolf just made it worse. I know I left so she could have a normal life but I couldn't let Bella date a werewolf or live with one for that matter it was much too dangerous. I picked up the phone again and dialled. Jacob answered again.

After the first six calls I was just about ready to give up. I decided to try one last time. I dialled and waited as the phone rang. _"Come on Bella, Come on. Please pick up the phone,"_ I urged in my mind.

"Hello," I heard a soft voice say politely. It was Bella. I smiled but then froze. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't talk to her she would think I was a stalker. "Hello is anyone there?" she asked. I breathed softly listening to the voice of the beautiful girl on the other end. I heard her breath in sharply and I hung up the phone, hoping that she didn't realise it was me. I put the phone on the table and walked to the couch. I lay down and replayed Bella's sweet voice in my head over and over again. I promised myself that tomorrow I would talk to Bella and explain everything to her. For once in my life… or existence I looked forward to the morning.

*~*~*

**I hope you enjoyed it. Anyway you no the deal 10 reviews and I update tonite or tomorrow. Remember next chapter is BPOV.**

**Pls, pls, pls review.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey guys I know I promised u this sooner but my computer was being stupid. That's also the reason that I haven't replied to all your reviews. U guys r so awesome thanx so much for reviewing they make me so happy. I promise that I will reply to all of them next time coz my computers fixed now. Anyway I hope u enjoy the chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

"Bella, Bella wake up," I heard a distant voice call. I then felt something shake my body.

"Come on Bells open your eyes," the voice said again worry dripping in their voice. I slowly opened my eyes. I looked up at Jake who was sitting on my bed his face looking down at me. His face was worried, his eyes burned into mine. _Oh no what had I been saying in my sleep_. I could feel that I had been sweating.

"Jake," I asked groggily "what was I saying?" His face became pained. He hesitated, obviously, deciding whether it was worth telling me. I was going to ask him again but suddenly my dream came flooding back. I could clearly see their faces in my mind and then I remember screaming, that must have been when Jake came in. A sob broke through my lips and tears ran down my face as I saw their faces over and over. Jake grabbed me and pulled me into a hug.

"Shhh, Shhh Bells. I'm here don't worry, Shhh," he whispered trying to comfort me. It didn't work the tears kept coming.

Jacob held me whispering words of comfort in my ear until I stopped crying. I took slow shallow breathes so that I wouldn't burst into tears again. Jake rubbed soothing circles on my back. When I was sure that the tears wouldn't return I pulled away from him and looked up at his face. He still had a worried look on his face.

"Was I screaming?" Jake nodded

"How bad was it?" I breathed. Jake sighed.

"Pretty bad. I thought there was someone in your room. You scared the hell out of me." I looked at him apologetically.

"Sorry," I murmured.

"Don't be. Bella it's not your fault." He stared at me. I didn't answer. I knew what he was going to ask.

"It was about them wasn't it?" Jake asked as he placed an arm on my shoulder. I nodded.

"I knew it, I knew that Cullen being back would bring back bad memories," he said bitterly. I didn't exactly disagree with him. The return of Edward had got me thinking about the events that occurred all those years ago. I heard Jake sigh.

"How bad was the dream?" he asked softly.

"Not that bad. I just saw their faces over and over again," a single tear slid down my cheek. Jacob reached over and touched my face collecting the tear on his thumb.

"Bella I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that you had to experience that and I'm sorry that you had to re-live it." The tears started to fall slowly down my face again. I felt my face crumple in pain. But that was quickly replaced as guilt washed over me. Jacob must have noticed this because he sighed. _He knows me too well,_ i thought silently

"Bella," he said softly. I didn't look at him. I couldn't, I felt guilty and ashamed. "Bella look at me." I ignored him. "Bella," he growled. I reluctantly brought my eyes to his.

"Bella it wasn't your fault ok, you have got to stop blaming yourself. You can't live with that type of guilt hanging over your head," he said his voice softer now. I desperately wanted to believe that he was right but I couldn't. It was my fault. I opened my mouth to argue but Jacob put a finger to my mouth so I couldn't speak.

"Bella," he said his voice louder now. There was a hint of frustration and anger in it too. "If you want someone to blame, blame me, blame Sam or Jared or Paul or Embry." I shook my head but he kept his finger to my mouth and continued talking. "Heck blame Cullen, blame all the bloodsuckers for leaving. Blame anyone but yourself. You couldn't have done anything Bells. It's not your fault". I didn't agree with him but I was too exhausted to argue so I just nodded my head. I wiped away the last of the tears and tried to smile at Jacob. He chuckled lightly.

"Bella that was pathetic." I laughed. I didn't even have to look in the mirror to know that he was right. He put his arms around me again.

"I swear I will never let anything or anyone hurt you again. I will always be here for you," he promised yet again. This comforted me and I smiled.

"Thanks," I mumbled into his chest. He let go and smiled down at me.

"I'm completely awake now, you want to watch a DVD?" he asked. I knew what he was doing. He knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep and even though he was tired he was going to stay up to make sure I didn't breakdown again.

"Jake I know what you're doing."

"What?" he asked acting all innocent.

"Jake you're tired I can see it. You don't have to stay up. I can look after myself for a few hours." He shook his head.

"Don't be silly Bella. If I was tired would I do this?" he said and stood up on my bed and started jumping up and down. He was singing _"I'm not tired, I'm not tired"_ over and over again. I laughed.

"Jake stop, you'll break my bed," I said between laughs. He did as I asked and stopped. He sat where he was before.

"See Bells I'm wide awake. Now I'm going to go watch a DVD. Are you going to join me?" he said panting a little. Apparently jumping up and down on a bed is pretty good exercise.

"Ok," I said smiling widely. With that he grabbed hold of my hand and dragged me to the lounge room. He sat me on the couch. Jake took a while to choose the DVD. I figured that he was looking for one that wouldn't upset me. A moment later he came and stood in front of me with the choices.

"Ok," he said, "it's either Family Guy or Family Guy," he held up the DVD.

"Ooooo that's tough," I said bringing my hand to my chin. "I think I'm going to have to go with Family Guy," I continued smiling up at him.

"Great choice," he laughed. He walked to the DVD player and placed the disc inside. He returned to the couch and sat down next to me. I looked at the clock it said it was 3:30 am. That was good. I didn't have to be at work until 7 today. I blocked everything from my mind and watched the TV.

*~*~*

I woke up on the couch with Jake snoring noisily next to me. It took me a while to remember why I was there and not in my bed. Finally the memories of earlier came rushing back. I saw their faces in my mind again. I bit my lip to stop myself from crying. I twisted my head to see what the time was. It was 7:00 am.

"Shit," I yelled and jumped up from the couch. I must've yelled pretty loud because Jake jumped up too.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he asked sounding concerned. He was clenching his fist and was looking around the room.

"I'm supposed to be at work like now," I told him. He relaxed and sat back down.

"Oh ok," he breathed, "well go get ready and we'll go. I'm sure they won't mind if you're a little late". I rushed to the bathroom and put on my nursing uniform. I didn't even bother looking in the mirror. I mean who cares what I look like it's not like I need to impress anyone. Well not really,… I mean there was Edward but I wasn't even sure that he would be there and even if he was, no matter what I did I would never be able to get him to love me again.

"Jake lets go," I yelled as I left the bathroom. He got up from the couch and we both jogged to the car. We both got in the car and Jake accelerated leaving the house behind us.

Jake yet again drove like a maniac. You think that I would be used to driving fast but I wasn't. It still made me nervous. Today, instead of dropping me off at the entrance he parked the car. I knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to keep Edward away from me… or me away from Edward. I glared at him.

"Jake," I said almost in a growl, "what are you doing?" He smiled at me.

"What, is it a crime for me to come to a hospital?" he asked.

"No it's not, but why exactly are you coming to a hospital?"

"That's private Bells, it's a personal health matter."

"Oh come off it Jacob we both know why you're here. And it's got nothing to do with your health," I said angrily. He just smiled at me again. _Oh my gosh, he is so infuriating sometimes._

"Ok, ok Bells you caught me. I just really wanted to see you at work. You know I love watching you take care of people." That was a lie.

"Oh really. I thought that you would rather cut off a finger then be around a bunch of sick people all day," I hissed. He stopped smiling.

"Bella I'm coming in with you end of discussion," he said all humour gone now. I groaned and exited the car. I heard Jake open and close his door and soon he was walking beside me. I didn't talk or even look at him. I was too angry. I heard him sigh but he didn't say anything. We walked in silence to the hospital and the nurses station.

When we got to the nurses station it was 7:15. _Wow, I got here sooner than I thought I would._

The morning passed pretty quickly with nothing exciting happening. Jacob was really starting to get on my nerves, he followed me everywhere. He would come with me to each patient's room and wait outside for me until I was finished. He was even going to follow me into the female toilets until I reminded him that only females were allowed in there. I hadn't seen Edward all morning. This made me feel both upset and relieved. I didn't know which emotion was more prevalent. At 1:00 pm I decided that I was going to take my lunch break. I went to the nurses station and told Jen and Millie and started walking toward the cafeteria.

"Hey Bells how bout we go out for lunch?" Jake asked. I ignored him and just kept walking. I was still angry at him. He groaned and followed me. When we got to the cafeteria it was empty. I smiled this meant that I wouldn't have to pretend to be all happy. I grabbed a sandwich and a juice and made my way to my normal table, Jake followed me. When we both sat down Jakes phone rang.

"Hello," he said into the receiver. Silence followed as he listened to the person on the other end.

"Uh,… can't it wait? I'm actually kind of busy at the moment," his face dropped as he listened to what the other person was saying. He stared at me.

"Ok … uh can I'll call you back in a couple of minutes?" he asked and then hung up.

"Jacob, go," I said staring back at him.

"No Bella," he said shaking his head.

"Come on be serious it's your job, they obviously need you. I don't need you babysitting me."

"It can wait," he insisted

"No it can't Jacob….Go… I'll be fine. It's a hospital what's the worst that can happen". He exhaled deeply and nodded.

"Ok fine but only if you promise me something." I groaned but nodded. I knew this was the only way to get him to leave.

"Ok what?" I queried.

"If you need anything at all call me, ok," he said forcefully. "You're more important to me than any job Bella"

"Ok," I whispered. With that he got up and left. _"Finally"_ I breathed softly to myself. I sat alone at the table for a long time enjoying being by myself. It was nice to be able to think without someone watching your every move. Just as I was about to get up and leave I felt someone grab me.

"What the hell," I screamed, "let go of me". The person did as I asked and I turned preparing to hit whoever it was. I stopped when I recognised them.

"Emmett," I said smiling. I tried to jump off my seat but as I did my foot got caught and I fell flat on my face. _"Good one Bella,"_ I yelled in my head. I started blushing. I could hear Emmett chuckling softly.

"I see that you're still as clumsy as ever," he commented and then continued laughing. This made me blush even harder. I stood up feeling embarrassed. Emmett must have realised because he stopped laughing.

"Come here," he said holding his arms open. I ran to him crashing into chest. He lifted me up off the ground and pulled me into a bone crushing hug. It hurt and it was hard to breathe but at that moment I didn't care. I hadn't realised how much I had missed Emmett until now and I never wanted him to let go. He was my big brother.

"I missed you Bella," he whispered as he put me down, "we all have". I found that hard to believe. He walked over to the table and sat down. He gestured for me to do the same.

"Really?" I asked disbelief in my voice. I sat down across from him. He nodded.

"Yeah." He was clearly just saying this to make me feel better. _If you all missed me so much why didn't you try to find me earlier?_ I asked myself, _It's been four years since I've seen any of you._

"Ok," I said trying to hide disbelief I still felt. Emmett must have heard this because his face became sad. I didn't want him to feel sad so I quickly changed the subject.

"So,… uh how long are you guys in town for?" I asked. Emmett smiled.

"For good…. Well you know not for good but for a while." I smiled at this not able to hide the excitement I felt. This must have pleased Emmett because his smile became even bigger.

"Hey Bella, do you want to come over to our house tonight? I know Esme would love to see you again," he asked. I didn't know what to say to this. As much as I wanted to see Esme again I didn't know if I could be in the same house as Edward when I knew he didn't love me anymore. It would be too awkward. I racked my brain trying to think of an excuse and then I remembered Charlie was coming up today.

"Uh,… I'd love to but Charlie is coming up tonight," I said. Emmett's smile faded and I felt kind of bad for lying to him.

"Why is Charlie coming up it seems like a kind of odd time?" he asked. I didn't want to lie to him so I decided to tell him the truth.

"Well he found out you guys were back and he was worried that it might…." I stopped before I said too much he didn't need to know about everything.

"Might what," Emmett asked clearly concerned.

"Oh nothing he was just worried," I lied hoping that he would let it go. He wasn't going to but before he could speak he was interrupted. Emmett and I had been so wrapped up in our conversation that we hadn't noticed that Edward was now standing near us.

"Hey Bella," he breathed. I hoped that he hadn't heard our conversation. I didn't answer him or even look at him.

"Bella," he said softly. I still didn't look up. He sighed in frustration

"Um, I was wondering if we could talk," he asked. _Why did he want to talk to me? What did he have to tell me that I didn't already know?_ I already knew that he didn't want me. I already knew that I was too plain and boring for him. I already knew that he didn't love me. _What, did he want to break my heart even more?_ This thought made me become angry. I refused to look at him.

"Bella plea-," I interrupted him before he could finish.

"I don't want to talk to you Edward just leave me alone," I spat as I stood up. I looked at Emmett and smiled

"It was good seeing you again Em". He smiled back at me and nodded. I pushed past Edward and stalked away from him. I secretly wished that he would chase after me and take me in his arms but he didn't. I felt my face become sad and started walking faster so I could distract myself with work sooner.

*~*~*

**Ok I hope u liked it. I know it's not my best chapter but anyway. Ok so whose faces do u think she keeps seeing? I think you will be surprised by who it is. It's pretty unexpected ppl. Have a guess. If u guess right I'll tell u.**

**Anyway pls pls review.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey guy's thanx so much for the reviews they were awesome. I want to let you know that you all rock. Anyway here is the next chapter I hope u enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

The rest of the day passed in a blur. I didn't run into Edward again which I was pleased about. I wasn't in the mood to shout anymore. It was 6:00pm when I checked on my last patient. Jake would be here in about ten minutes to pick me up. I said goodbye to all the nurses at the station and walked to the hospital car park. I sat on the ground and waited for Jake to come get me.

_Where the hell is he,_ I thought angrily. It was now 6:30. I pulled out my phone and realised I had a missed call from Jake. I flipped open my phone and listened to the message he left for me. It said that he was stuck at work and he couldn't come and pick me up_. "Thanks for warning me earlier Jake,"_ I muttered silently. _Since when does a mechanic get stuck at work especially at night-time? What am I supposed to do now?_ Everyone that could have given me a lift had already gone. I racked my brains for a way to get home. The only option left to me was taking the bus. "I hate you Jacob," I muttered angrily. I stood up and started walking to the bus stop. But before I could even take two steps a familiar voice spoke.

"Do you need a lift home?" the velvety voice asked. I felt my heart accelerate and I felt electricity jolt through my body. I blushed it was so embarrassing that he could still do this to me. I prayed that he didn't notice. _"Yes, yes take me home,"_ the voice in my head screamed. I didn't listen to it.

"Uh no I can catch the bus," I said trying to make my voice sound harsh. I wasn't sure if it worked.

"Bella, don't be ridiculous," he sighed, "I can give you a lift home." I just shook my head afraid of what my voice would sound like if I spoke. He groaned.

"Bella," he growled almost angry, "I'm not going to let you catch a bus." His voice became softer when he spoke again, "we don't even have to talk if you don't want. I'll just drive you home and drop you off".

"Ok," I whispered. He walked past me heading toward his car. I followed him. He stopped at a black Mercedes. It looked a lot like the one Carlisle had back in Forks only it was a bit different. I figured that it must have been a newer model, the Cullens couldn't have one car for any extended period of time. I_ wonder what type of car Edward drove now_. I stood there just thinking to myself for a while and then I heard Edward cough. "_Shit good one Bella, he probably thinks your crazy now,"_ I yelled at myself. I opened the door of the car and quickly got in, hurriedly putting my seat belt on. Edward rushed to the driver's side and started the car. He backed carefully from his parking spot but stopped and looked at me. I just looked at him confused.

"Um Bella I don't know where you live," he said quietly.

"Oh right," I said back and then quickly explained how to get to my house. I kept the explanation as short as possible. I didn't want to speak to him longer than I had to. That was part of our agreement after all. As much as I secretly wanted to talk to him and confess that I was still deeply in love with him, I couldn't. The first reason was that I wanted him to feel the pain that I felt when he left. The second reason is that I was afraid that if I did let him back in I would get hurt again._ I don't think I would be able to live through that type of pain again_. He nodded when he understood where to go and he pressed his foot lightly to the accelerator.

We drove in silence. I was surprised that he was going to keep his promise. I glanced at the speedometer he was only going 80km ph (approx 50mph). Why is he driving so slowly? I knew he was doing it for my benefit, I just didn't know why. Maybe he wanted to spend as much time with me as he could. "_Yeah Bella that's it, that's the only possible reason he would be driving slowly," _I thought yelling at myself for being such an idiot. "_He probably just doesn't want to scare you." _Of course, that's it he didn't want to scare me. I looked at Edward and noticed he was staring at me. His eyes met with mine for a moment but I quickly turned my head. I blushed and scolded myself for being so stupid. _"Good one Bella, he totally doesn't know that you're still obsessed with him."_ I didn't dare look at him again during the car ride. I just stared at my hands. I looked out the window when we arrived at the house. "_Thank god,"_ I thought relieved that this trip was finally over it was much too awkward for my liking. Edward stopped the car in front of my house, he exhaled deeply.

"Bella," he breathed his velvety voice so quiet that I almost didn't hear it. So much for not talking to me. I should have known he would never keep his promise, he couldn't do it before what would have possibly changed in four years. Five years ago when I was in the hospital he promised that he would stay with me as long as I wanted him. He then broke that promise six months later when he left. I yelled at myself for accepting his offer, I should have known better. Soon the anger that I was directing at myself turned into anger at Edward.

"Edward," I said so sharply that if I hadn't felt my lips move I wouldn't have recognised the voice as my own. "You promised that we didn't have to talk. I knew that you were never one for keeping promises I just thought that in four years you might have changed…. How stupid of me." He groaned… it sounded frustrated as well as angry.

"Fine….Go," he snapped at me bitterly. I did as he said. I opened the door getting out as quick as I could and slammed the door as hard as I could. _"Ha I hope the doors broken,"_ I screamed angrily in my head. I then remembered that it was probably Carlisle's car and I felt a little bit bad. I spun and stomped towards the front door. I heard the car accelerate and speed away from the house. Now that's the driving I was used too.

When arrived to the door I lifted the door mat to get the key but noticed it was gone. _"Crap,"_ I gulped becoming kind of scared. I reached for the door handle and twisted it slowly. _"Double Crap,"_ it was already open. I walked into the house slowly and made my way too the coat cupboard which was near the front door. I remembered that Jake had a baseball bat in there. I grabbed the bat and walked slowly toward the kitchen. I could hear somebody stomping around. I raised the bat above my head, my arms shaking. I could see the person now. They had their back to me and because it was dark in the house I couldn't really see them. I could just make out their outline, they weren't overly big but they could hurt me if they wanted. I approached the person slowly, I was about to hit them when they turned around. The light from outside crossed their face and I now recognised them.

"Bella," the familiar voice of my Dad said. I swore loudly as I dropped the bat, it fell to the ground making a loud clanging sound. I raised both hands to my heart. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply.

"Dad what the…. What the hell are you doing here? You scared the crap out of me…. I thought you were robbing the place," I commented slightly breathless. I swore again. Charlie walked over to the kitchen light and turned it on. _Oh so he decides to turn on the light after I've already had a heart attack. _He looked at me taking in my stance and he smiled. _Oh great he thinks it's funny_.

"Sorry Bells, you and Jake weren't here and I knew where the key was so I just let myself in," he said as he walked over to me.

"What and you decided that you would leave the lights off because you wanted to save electricity or something?" I asked grouchily "Oh and you know there is this great technology now, it's called a phone…. It allows you to communicate with people when you're in a different place to them. It stops them from almost having a heart attack when they come home and find their door unlocked."

"Bella, I told Jake that I was coming last night. Didn't he tell you?" He asked still not upset about nearly killing his only daughter. I looked at him angrily, this caused some of the humour to leave his face.

"Ok fine I'm sorry for scaring you," he said. I felt the anger leave me and I smiled at him.

"It's ok Dad," I said to him. He smiled back at me.

"Ok now what does a man have to do around here to get a hug?" he asked. Since the..._event..._Charlie and I were more comfortable showing emotions to each other. It was no longer awkward when we did so. We were also more comfortable talking to each other as well. I mean there was still some things that I couldn't tell my dad but I could talk to him about most stuff. I walked the two steps that separated us and threw my arms around him. He did the same to me. When I heard something from the bathroom I let go of Charlie and picked up the bat again.

"Did you bring someone?" I asked. He nodded and I dropped the bat to the ground. It made a clanging sound again. "Who?" I asked looking at his face. Before he could answer the person walked out. My mouth hung open it looked exactly like Seth Clearwater only he was a lot bigger, he was almost as big as Jake.

"Seth?" I asked. He looked at me and grinned. I ran to him. I stopped just in front of him. "Oh my, your so big….Wait does that mean that you're-," he nodded and his smile became even bigger. Charlie interrupted me before I could finish.

"Yeah Bells he's a werewolf," Charlie said answering my question. I looked at him surprised at how cool he was about this. When Jake had first told,...well actually showed, Charlie what he was, he freaked out. He didn't understand it. Billy had to talk to him for hours. Usually the Quileute's wouldn't share their secret with anyone but the whole pack decided that it was necessary to tell Charlie. It was necessary to involve Charlie in their world so they could protect me. Charlie knew about vampires as well. That's part of the reason he's so worried that the Cullens are back. He doesn't really understand them so he's scared that they will actually hurt me, physically. I couldn't blame him really, not after what happened. I quickly pushed that thought to the back of my mind, I didn't want to cry now. I turned back to Seth and hugged him. He picked me up and crushed me. I couldn't breathe.

"Uh...Seth...can't...breathe," he laughed and then put me down carefully. I laughed too. All of a sudden Seth stopped and looked at me his face becoming more serious.

"Anyway Bells, how have you been? I heard about the whole bloodsucker situation. Are you ok?" he asked. _What the hell, how does Seth know about the Cullens being here?_ I turned and looked at Charlie, he was avoiding my gaze. I groaned, Charlie had told Seth. That meant that the whole pack probably knew as well, _Great._

"Seth I'm fine. I don't care that they are back, it's not like they are going to be here for that long." I knew that that was a lie but I didn't need everyone knowing that the Cullens were sticking around. It would just make them unnecessarily angry. "I just wish that people would stop talking about it. It's not that big a deal," I said and walked to the fridge.

"Anyway enough about me. Are you guy's hungry?" I asked changing the subject. I looked at them both and they nodded. They then went too the lounge room to watch some TV. I pulled out some veggies and began making a salad. I took out four plates and put some salad on each plate. When the salad was finished I went to the freezer and took out some fish, I put it in the oven and then walked to the lounge room. I saw that Charlie and Seth were watching baseball.

"Hey, I'm just going to go have a quick shower before dinner, ok," they both muttered in reply. I closed the bathroom door, took of my clothes and stepped into the shower.

After about five minutes I reluctantly turned the tap off and stepped out. I wished that I could've stayed in for longer but dinner was cooking. I got dressed in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I stepped out of the bathroom and made my way to the kitchen. I got the fish from the oven and put a piece on each plate. I then walked and put three plates on the table.

"Dinners ready," I said loudly to Seth and Charlie. They turned off the TV and rushed into the kitchen sitting at the table. We all sat in silence eating our dinner. When we were half way through Jake arrived home.

"Ooooo smells good. What's for dinner Bells?" Jake asked as he entered the door. He walked in too the kitchen and noticed we had visitors.

"Charlie...Seth," he said a smile spreading across his face. He came over and shook both of their hands "It's good to see you both." He then looked at me.

"Hey Bells."

"Don't _hey Bells_ me Jacob," I snapped at him. I was still angry. First he wouldn't leave me alone and then he rings me and says he can't pick me up, which would have been ok if he had of told me earlier so I could arrange a lift, but he didn't. I got up and went to the bench in the kitchen and got his dinner. I heated it up and then walked back to the table, throwing it down in front of him.

"Ok Bella I'm sorry that I didn't pick you up," he said to me.

"What ever," I mumbled and then began eating again. I heard him laugh quietly. _"Jerk,"_ I thought to myself.

When we finished dinner they all told me how great it was. I took all the plates and rinsed them before putting them in the dishwasher. The boys moved to the lounge room. I decided to join them. I sat on the floor near Jake. I wasn't angry at him anymore. He recognised this because he talked to me.

"Hey Bells, how did you get home anyway?" he asked. _Crap_, I hadn't thought of that yet. There was no way I could tell him that Edward dropped me off. I began racking my brains for something believable. I could feel his gaze on me so I decided to tell him the truth, but just leave out that it was Edward who gave me the lift.

"Um...I got a lift home," I said praying that he would just leave it there and not ask any more questions. He must've noticed my reluctance to answer the question because he continued with the interrogation.

"With who?" he asked his face suspicious.

"Um...just a friend," I lied. Of course Jacob knew this so he kept asking me questions.

"Who?" he asked

"Jen," I answered without even thinking.

"Oh really. That's weird because I saw her leaving when I did this afternoon. Now stop lying to me Bella and tell me who drove you home." _Damn, why did today have to be the day when Jen left early?_ Jacob glared at me. I avoided his gaze and didn't answer him.

"Bella," he said angrily

"Ok fine Edward gave me a lift home, happy now," I hissed. Charlie and Seth were both staring at me now as well. They all yelled at me but I couldn't understand what any of them said. It sounded like a bunch of gibberish. They stopped yelling at me when they realised this.

"Bella what the hell were you thinking?" Jake yelled.

"I was thinking that I wanted to get home, since you deserted me. It was the only option I had so I took it. Now if you three are done ganging up on me I'm going to bed," I yelled back. They all sat there shocked. I got up and went to my room slamming my door closed. I got changed into my sweats and lay on the bed, drifting into unconsciousness.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter. I hope you liked it. Just wanted to let you know that the next chapter will probably be in EPOV. But don't worry it will make the story move forward.**

**You know the drill review and you get the next chapter faster.**

**Pls, pls review.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey guys thanx so much for the reviews they are awesome. They made me feel so happy. They really do make me want to write faster.**

**In the last chapter a lot of u asked why Jake showed Charlie what he was. Well that will be explained later so don't worry. **

**Anyway here is the next chapter. As promised it is in EPOV. I hope u enjoy it.**

**Again, thanx so much for reviewing and pls continue to do so. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

I didn't see Bella for the rest of the day after our lunchtime conversation. If you could even call it that. I think for something to classify as a conversation both people have to participate. Bella would either ignore me or she would yell at me and not let me speak. As strange as it might sound I actually preferred the yelling, at least I could tell what she was feeling and thinking. I usually didn't like what she said but at least I could kind of tell what was going through her head. When she ignored me it almost killed me. It was times like that when I most hated not being able to read her mind. If I could die for a second time it would be from that. I asked Emmett what they had talked about so I could try to figure out what was going through her head but he wasn't much help. I thought that maybe he was hiding something but when I looked in his mind it confirmed that he had been telling the truth. The frustration that I felt hours ago came coursing back as I remembered this.

It was 5 o'clock now. I looked around my surroundings. I was in front of the nurses' station. I must have walked there unconsciously when I started thinking about Bella, because I don't remember deciding to walk there. I looked around hoping to see her, she wasn't there. I groaned. I came to the conclusion that she was avoiding me. I mean we worked on the same ward, it was pretty much impossible for us not too see each other at least once. I was pulled from my internal discussion when a shy intern approached me.

"Uh...um, DD-Dr Cullen I was wondering ii-if... um...well I need some hh-help with one of my p-patients," he stuttered nervously. I smiled at him trying to make him feel more comfortable.

"Of course," I answered smiling at him. I looked at his name tag to find out his name, "where too Dr Roberts?" I asked kindly. This seemed to give him some confidence.

"This way," he said and left. I followed him

*~*~*

When I finished helping the intern it was 6:20. My shift finished twenty minutes ago. I went to Carlisle's office, he was already sitting in there waiting for me. He stood up when I opened the door and we both walked at human pace to the hospital entrance. When we exited the doors I noticed Bella sitting on the sidewalk. She flipped her phone closed and muttered angrily to herself. I smiled. She needed a lift home, this would give me the perfect opportunity to talk to her. I looked at Carlisle who was smiling also. _"Go Edward, I can find my own way home,"_ he said in his head.

"Are you sure?" I asked. He just nodded. _"Good luck,"_ he said kindly in his thoughts. I smiled and then strolled over to Bella.

"I hate you Jacob," she muttered softly as she stood up. She was walking away. I had to stop her.

"Do you need a lift home?" I asked trying my best to keep the hope out of my voice. I heard her heart accelerate. I smiled. She then began to blush. My smile became even bigger, I loved it when Bella blushed. I didn't know why she was blushing exactly but it was still nice.

"Uh no I can catch the bus," she said her voice sounding kind of weird. There was definitely a bit of anger in there but there was also something else that I couldn't quite define. My smile faded. _Why couldn't she just accept my offer? Why couldn't she just talk to me?_

"Bella don't be ridiculous," I sighed, "I can give you a lift home". She didn't answer me she just shook her head. _Why does she have to be so stubborn?_ I thought as I groaned.

"Bella," I said. I tried my best to keep it composed but failed. It sounded like a growl. "I'm not letting you catch a bus," I added. I came up with a compromise. It would mean that I couldn't talk to Bella but at least I would be close to her. Maybe if I was close enough I could begin to understand what she was thinking. I made my voice softer and spoke again, "We don't even have to talk if you don't want. I'll just drive you home and drop you off". I watched her contemplate this silently for a few seconds and then she answered.

"Ok," she whispered. I couldn't help but smile again. We had actually had a conversation and made a compromise. She was actually going to sit in a car with me. I walked past her and headed to Carlisles car. I could hear her soft footsteps behind me so I knew she was following. I stopped in front of Carlisles car and unlocked it. I got in and waited for Bella to do the same. She didn't. I hopped out of the car and just watched her thinking for a while. I wished that I could hear what she was thinking about. When it got too frustrating I coughed pulling Bella from her daze. She looked embarrassed and quickly got in to the car. I copied her. I backed out from the place that we were parked in, and then stopped and gazed at Bella. She stared at me with a confused look on her face

"Um Bella I don't know where you live," I said quietly. This was a lie of course but I didn't want Bella to think I was a stalker. Also I wanted to hear her beautiful voice.

"Oh right," she said and explained how to get to her house. I paid attention to every little syllable that came from her mouth. I hadn't realised how much I had missed just listening to her speak until that moment. Just then she finished explaining. I wanted to make her talk more but I didn't know how. I had promised that I wouldn't speak to her. I nodded at her to let her know that I understood where to go and then accelerated.

I stared at Bella the whole drive. I was watching her face for any flicker of emotion that would give me an insight into what she was thinking. So far there wasn't anything. This annoyed me. I was driving at 80km ph so I could be around her for as long as possible. Bella must have noticed that I was going slowly because she looked at the speedometer. She looked annoyed and impatient. I fought to keep back a laugh. It was like our roles had been reversed. Usually I couldn't stand being at the speed limit and usually Bella would shout at me too stay at the speed limit. I had to admit it was rather frustrating going so slow but it was worth it if I got to be with Bella, even if we weren't talking. She looked up at me and our eyes met for a miniscule moment. She quickly turned away. I yelled at myself for being an idiot, she was probably freaked out that I had been watching her. She didn't look at me again, she just stared at her hands.

When we got to the front of her house I reluctantly stopped the car. She was about to leave the car. I couldn't just let her leave. I know I promised that I wouldn't talk to her but I had to know what she was thinking.

"Bella," I breathed so quietly that I thought she didn't hear it. I was about to say it again but then she turned and glared at me so viciously that I almost didn't recognise her. Ok so she had heard me.

"Edward," she said sharply. I had never seen Bella like this before, it was almost like she was a different person. "You promised that we didn't have to talk. I knew that you were never one for keeping promises I just thought that in four years you might have changed…. How stupid of me". This comment stung. _"Why can't you just listen to me?"_ I yelled in my head. I groaned loudly trying to rid myself of all the anger and frustration that I felt, it didn't work.

"Fine….Go," I snapped without even really thinking. She did as I asked and got out of the car. She slammed the door hard. She walked to the house and I slammed my foot on the accelerator getting away as fast as I could.

*~*~*

When I got home I was still fuming over the "B_ella" _situation. I ran into the house and banged the door shut. I heard a cracking sound. _Great it's probably broken._ Everyone came out to see what was going on. They all looked concerned. Esme took a step toward me but I put a hand up to stop her.

"I don't want to talk about it," I muttered and hurried up the steps to my room. I made sure not to slam the door this time. I went to the couch and sat down. I heard someone come to the door but they left pretty quickly. I wasn't exactly sure who it was but I was glad that they didn't insist on coming in. I needed to be by myself right now.

After being by myself for two hours I finally decided that I should join my family. After all it wasn't there fault that Bella didn't want to speak to me. I got up and trudged downstairs. They were all sitting in the lounge room I joined them, sitting in the recliner chair that was free. When I entered, they all became silent and I could feel them all staring at me. I blocked out all of their thoughts because I knew exactly what each of them wanted to know.

"So you want to know what happened between me and Bella?" I sighed. They nodded and then Carlisle spoke.

"Yes son. What happened? It looked so hopeful from where I was standing. You two seemed to be getting along," he asked concern and interest crossing his face. I told them all what happened. When I finished they groaned, except for Esme and Carlisle of course.

"EEEEE-dw-aaaaaa-rd," Alice whined. I stared at her. _Why on earth is she whining at me? I didn't do anything wrong._

"What?" I asked irritated. She shook her head.

"Why couldn't you just keep your promise? Was it really that hard?" I didn't really understand why this mattered.

"I wanted to speak to her. I don't see why that matters." Alice exhaled deeply and rolled her eyes at me.

"Of course you wouldn't. Edward she was speaking to you…well sort of, not really but she wasn't ignoring you anymore. Then you go and break a promise…another one. Of course she is going to be angry," Alice said softly. _What did she mean that I broke another promise?_ Bella had said this when she yelled at me too. _What other promise did I break?_

"What do you mean another one?" I asked my voice angrier than I intended.

"Edward don't you remember what you promised Bella when she was in the hospital after being attacked by James?" We both cringed at this. _Of course that promise...it all made sense now._ I had promised Bella that I would never leave her as long as it was what she wanted. I had also added that I would only stay if it was what was best for her as well. But apparently she didn't remember that part of my promise. My face creased as I succumbed to the grief that was washing over me. I could hear the thoughts of my family around me become sad also. They didn't like seeing me like this.

After a while of sitting there in silence I felt someone come and stand by me. I looked up to see Esme standing there looking worried. She placed a hand on my shoulder, I put my hand on top of hers.

"She'll come around Edward you have just got to be patient. She still loves you she just doesn't want to get hurt again," Esme whispered softly to me. I smiled at her and she smiled back kindly.

"Thanks Mom," I murmured softly. The use of the word _"Mom"_ made her smile even bigger. Unexpectedly I jumped out of my seat, smiling. I had to go see Bella right now. This thought made me happy. She should be asleep by now which meant I could watch her without her knowing

"Uh, I have to go…for a walk," I lied. None of them believed me. They all knew exactly where I was going. I jogged out of the door and ran as fast as I could to Bella's house.

When I got to Bella's house I found her room quickly. I got inside easily through her window. It was a lot easier then it used to be. At her old house years ago Bella had two stories and her room was on the second story. This house only had one story, which meant all I had to do was get through her window. When I got in she mumbled.

"No go away," she said. I thought for a second that I had woken her up but then she rolled over. I wondered what she was dreaming about. I was completely silent as I waited for her to speak again. I went and stood right beside her bed.

"No please leave them alone," she begged. This worried me she sounded stressed.

"Please don't hurt them, I'll come with you. Please just leave them alone." She almost cried. _"Who Bella?"_ I asked in my head.

"Run," she almost screamed. "No, please just leave I'll be fine. You have to run." She started to toss and turn.

"No take me," she pleaded. "Please." I wondered who was doing this to my Bella. I couldn't stand to see her like this.

"Nooooooo," she screamed this time. "Ben, Angela," she cried. She then started screaming a blood curdling scream. I yearned to take her in my arms and tell her that everything was ok, but I knew I couldn't. I heard people come running towards Bella's room and reluctantly I jumped out of her window and went home. I wished that I knew what she was dreaming about. _What happened to Ben and Angela? Who was doing it to her?_

When I got to the house I jogged upstairs. I entered my room and sat down on my couch still trying to figure out what Bella had been dreaming about. I promised myself that I would find out. All the anger that I felt earlier had faded now. The only thing I felt was concern for Bella. I would talk to her tomorrow,...well today technically, even if she did yell at me.

*~*~*

**Ooooo now you know whose faces that she was seeing. I know unexpected right? I hope u r not disappointed. Question is what happened to Ben and Angela? Who is trying to hurt them? Did it actually happen or is it just a dream?**

**All these questions will be answered in good time. I hope u enjoyed reading this chapter.**

**Anyway as u know the more reviews the faster I write. So pls review.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hey so I've got over 100 reviews now Yay. Very exciting. Anyway here's the next chapter. It doesn't answer a lot of questions about Ben & Angela but don't worry that will come soon.**

**Thanx so much for all of your reviews they make me feel happy. All of you are awesome. **

**I hope u enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

I woke up abruptly when I started screaming. I had been dreaming about them again. I clamped my hand to my mouth to stop the screaming. Tears poured from my eyes. I hoped that everyone else hadn't heard the screaming. They did.

"Bella," Charlie and Seth yelled as they ripped open the door. Jake had run in to the room but he didn't yell out my name. He knew what was wrong. Charlie and Seth were looking around the room their eyes searching for the reason for my screaming.

"What's wrong?" they asked in unison their eyes resting on me. Jake walked past both of them and came and sat on my bed. He wrapped his arms around me. Charlie must have understood what had happened because he came and sat on the bed too, resting his hand on my shoulder. Seth still didn't understand.

"You had a dream about them," Charlie whispered. It was more of a statement than a question. I nodded my head anyway to let him know that he was right. Seth understood now.

"Oh," he said, "you had a dream about Ben and Angela". I cringed at their names. Hearing their names spoken was more difficult then seeing them. Charlie and Jake glared at Seth.

"What?" Seth asked, oblivious. He stood there for a while and then he understood.

"Oh, right," he spoke softly, "you don't like mentioning their names....Sorry Bella". Charlie and Jake glared at him again. I turned to him and smiled kindly. After all what happened wasn't Seth's fault.

"Its fine Seth." He nodded his head and then left the room. I assumed he did so, so he couldn't say anything else that would possibly upset me and cause Charlie and Jake to glare at him.

"Are you ok Bells?" Charlie asked. I nodded my head. I was lying of course but I didn't feel like talking. I just felt like being alone.

"Yeah I'm fine. Just a little tired I think I'm going to go back to sleep. You should both do the same". Charlie kissed me on the head and then left. Jacob didn't follow.

"Bella," he sighed. I interrupted him before he could say anything else.

"Jake I don't feel like talking right now. We'll talk tomorrow. Ok." He nodded and then left the room closing the door softly behind him. I put my head down on my pillow. Angela and Ben's faces crossed my mind over and over again. A set fresh of tears started rolling down my cheeks. Guilt rolled over me causing the tears to fall harder. Sobs coursed through my body causing whimpers to escape my mouth. I buried my head in the pillow to hide the whimpers. I didn't want anyone coming in and seeing me like this.

*~*~*

I didn't wind up getting back to sleep I just sat up for hours crying. When it reached 4:00 am I think I had dried out my tear ducts. My eyes were puffy and my throat was dry from the crying and screaming. I sat in my bed inhaling deeply to make sure that the tears wouldn't return. When I was certain that it was safe I got up out of bed and walked to the bathroom. I undressed slowly and then hopped in the shower.

I stood in the shower for at least thirty minutes. The warm water released the tension from my body waking me up. I would have stayed in for longer but I had work today. I groaned softly and then unwillingly stepped out of the shower. The cool air shocked me causing a shiver down my spine. I quickly got dressed and ran out of the bathroom. I could still hear Seth, Jake and Charlie snoring in their beds. A smile spread across my face. This meant that I could drive myself to work and avoid a repeat of yesterday. I grabbed the keys for Jakes car and rushed outside. I got in the car and drove slowly away from the house.

I arrived at the car park of the hospital thirty minutes later. I parked as close to the hospital as I could so I wouldn't have to walk that far. I hopped out of the car and walked slowly toward the hospital. As I neared the doors I saw that there was someone leaning casually on the wall, it was Edward. He was staring at me. _What is he doing?_ As I got to the doors he approached me. _Oh crap, he was waiting for me. Why can't he just leave me alone?_

"Hey Bel-," he started. Before he could finish I pushed past him. I heard him groan. I then felt him come and walk beside me, keeping up with my pace easily.

"Are you ever going to talk to me?" he breathed. I stopped and glared at him. The anger that I felt last night came surging back.

"WHY EDWARD. WHY SHOULD I?" I yelled. Not caring who was listening to us at that moment. His face became...hurt,... no not hurt, it must be pity. Yes that's what it was Edward pitied me.

"Because Bella I wan-." Before he could finish I stormed off. He chased after me again.

"Will you please just listen," he asked angrily. _What the hell why is he getting angry?_ This made me even angrier.

"NO," I screamed. He groaned.

"FINE," he yelled back at me. He started walking faster and soon I could no longer see him.

"Stupid vampire," I muttered angrily to myself.

"I hope you're not talking about me," a voice said softly. I turned to see Carlisle smiling kindly at me. I smiled back.

"Of course not," I whispered feeling a little embarrassed. I started to blush "It was…well, it was nothing". His eyes looked at me sympathetically.

"I wish to apologise for my son's behaviour, it was rude of him. He shouldn't have yelled at you like that, he's not a child. It was very inappropriate." I started blushing harder, he had seen the whole argument.

"You saw that?" I questioned. He nodded. "Well than you should know that it wasn't all Edward's fault…I yelled at him first." Carlisle frowned slightly.

"No matter. He should still know better than to yell back," he smiled at me again. I looked away from him, embarrassed by my behaviour.

"Anyway Bella, Esme was wondering if you would come over tonight. She would very much like to see you…we all would." He stared at me. How could I not go? I had nothing else on and well how could I say no to Carlisle…and Esme. I missed them incredibly. I could survive one night of Edward.

"Sure," I said looking up at Carlisle.

"Great, well I had better get to work now." He gave me one last smile and then walked away. I followed him heading towards the nurses' station. Jen and Millie weren't on the early shift today so they weren't sitting waiting to fill me in on the gossip. I decided, therefore, to start work right away. I hurried to Mr Lang's room.

I entered Mr Lang's room and gasped. The bed was empty. Mr Lang wasn't there. Oh please no…he can't be. A solitary tear rolled down my cheek. I quickly turned. I had to go see what had happened. I stopped abruptly. Edward was standing in the doorway.

"He's been moved to another ward," he said no emotion in his voice. I sighed deeply, relieved that Mr Lang was ok. I was also a bit sad though. _He's in another ward now which means he won't be my patient anymore_. I had to go see him and say goodbye.

"Um….. where is he?" I asked looking anywhere but at Edward.

"The third floor." I nodded and then walked past him. As I did so my hand brushed against his sending a shock through my body. It felt weird, feeling his skin after all this time. I rushed to the elevators and pressed the up button.

When the elevator arrived I got in and pushed my finger to the button that had 3 on it. The doors were closing until someone stuck there arm in the way causing the doors to slide open. It was Edward. He reached over me and pressed the door close button. _"What the hell is he doing,"_ I asked myself angrily. Then I realised he was trying to get me alone. I was just about to get out of the elevator but then the doors closed. _Crap,_ I groaned and folded my arms over my chest.

"Bella," he breathed. I didn't say anything. Just because he had me alone doesn't mean he could force me to talk to him. "Bella," he said louder this time. I still didn't answer him. Suddenly he hit the emergency stop button.

"What the hell are you doing," I hissed.

"Getting you to talk to me," he said his voice calm. I reached over and pressed the button again. The elevator started moving slowly. Edward groaned and pushed the emergency stop button again.

"Edward in case you haven't noticed I don't want to speak to you….How many more times do I have to say it before you'll listen," I spat. He just stared at me smiling all smugly. I pushed the button again. Before the elevator could even start moving Edward pressed it again as well. He pressed it very hard. I pushed it but nothing happened. I tried it again still nothing. I turned and glared at Edward.

"Now look what you've done," I said sharply. He smiled.

"Sorry, I don't know my own strength," he said smugly. I groaned loudly and went to the phone. Edward beat me there. I stopped. I didn't want him to wreck the phone too. I let out an angry scream and then went and sat down in the corner of the elevator. He sat in the corner opposite me. We sat there in silence. I had my head down, I was staring at my hands.

"Bella." He was trying to get me to look at him. He wouldn't win.

"Bella," he said again. He exhaled deeply

"Bella…will you please just,…will you…please talk to me." His voice sounded pained. I could feel my heart beat faster and my breathing become faster. I didn't talk to him I was too afraid of what my voice would sound like.

"Will you look at me at least?" I could feel him staring at me. Reluctantly I looked up at him. We stared into each others eyes. The moment was so intense, I had to pull my eyes away. I heard Edward sigh. I decided that if I was going to be stuck in an elevator with him I may as well talk.

"So,…uh…Edward how have you been?" I asked trying to sound casual. It didn't really work.

"Ok," he answered. "How about you?"

"Um…fine," I said awkwardly. He nodded. It was silent for a while and the Edward spoke breaking it.

"So when did you become friends with a werewolf?" he queried a hint of anger in his voice. I knew this would come up.

"A while," I answered bitterly.

"Bella, do have any idea how dangerous werewolves are? And your not only friends with him you live with him as well". His voice was disapproving. This made me angry. _What right does he have to come here and tell me what's dangerous._

"Oh and hanging out with a bunch of vampires was completely safe." His face became hard.

"That's not what I was saying. It's just…don't you remember the promise you made me. You said you wouldn't do anything reckless. Did you keep that promise at all?" he said his voice cold. I turned to him and my eyes became icy and hard. _He did not just say that to me._ I stood up tears starting to stream down my face

"DON'T YOU DARE ACCUSE ME OF BREAKING MY PROMISE. UNLIKE YOU I KEEP MINE. UNLIKE YOU WHEN I SAY I LOVE YOU I MEAN IT," I yelled my voice so hard and cold that I even scared myself a little. Edward opened his mouth to speak but I cut him off. I wiped my hand across my cheeks, ridding of all the tears.

"AND LEAVE JAKE OUT OF THIS. UNLIKE YOU HE WOULD NEVER HURT ME. HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME." I went over to the emergency stop button and smashed it hoping that by some miracle it would work now. Apparently it was a good time for a miracle because the elevator started moving again. Edward was standing now too.

"Bella," he whispered softly.

"FUCK OFF EDWARD. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THIS TO ME. AT LEAST JAKE WAS THERE,…AT LEAST HE…HE TRIED TO-," I yelled. Edwards face became confused.

"Tried to what," he asked.

"Nothing. Just leave me alone," I said wiping away the last of the tears. He was about to speak again but before he could the elevator stopped and the doors slowly opened. I ran out leaving Edward standing alone.

*~*~*

**Anyway so that was the chapter I hoped u liked it.**

**As I tell u every time the more reviews the faster I write. **

**So pls pls pls review.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Ok guys so here is the next chapter. Its EPOV so unfortunately there is nothing about Ben and Angela yet, Sorry. I know you guys really want to find out what happened. Don't worry you will find out soon. **

**It's pretty much a repeat of the last chapter except in EPOV because I really wanted to write EPOV of the argument. There is a little extra bit on the end tho.**

**Thank you so much for all your reviews they r incredible and I am always excited to read them. Pls keep them coming.**

**Anyway I'll let u read now.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

I drove my own car to the hospital this morning. I told Carlisle that I just felt like driving today. He of course knew the real reason why I wanted to drive. I was secretly hoping that Bella would need a lift home again. I parked my Volvo in a parking space and then walked to the hospital entrance. When I arrived at the doors I leaned against the wall. I decided last night that I would wait outside until Bella arrived. I would get her to talk to me today no matter what. She had to know that I still loved her.

After about ten minutes of waiting I saw Jacob Black's car. I looked in the driver's seat and sighed. It was Bella driving and there was no-one else in the car with her. That would mean she wouldn't need a lift home today. _Damn._ I watched as she got out of the car and walked slowly toward the hospital…and me. When she got to the doors I approached her.

"Hey Bel-," I said. She pushed past me before I could finish. _Why does she have to be so stubborn?_ I groaned and then walked after her. I caught up fairly quickly. I walked beside her, keeping up with the pace easily.

"Are you ever going to talk to me?" I asked my voice sad. She turned and glared at me. Her face became angry. _Great, here comes the yelling again._

"WHY EDWARD. WHY SHOULD I?" she yelled at me. I felt my face crumple, becoming hurt. _"Because I love you Bella,"_ I screamed in my head.

"Because Bella I wan-". She stormed off again. _Ok this is just getting ridiculous now._ I chased after her again. I was trying to keep myself calm but was failing horribly. I was angry, _why can't she just listen to what I have to say?_

"Will you please just listen?" I asked my voice angry. My anger caused her to become even angrier. At that moment I didn't care I just wanted her to speak to me.

"NO," she screamed. I groaned again, trying to let out my frustration.

"FINE," I yelled back and then stormed off leaving her behind me. As much as I wanted to stay and get her to talk to me I knew she wouldn't. I would have to wait until she didn't have a choice. I walked to Carlisles office thinking of ways I could get Bella alone.

When I arrived I noticed that he wasn't there. I waited a few minutes for Carlisle to come. When he didn't I decided to start work. I made my way to my first patient's room, his name was Mr Lang. As I entered his room I noticed the bed was empty. I stood frozen for a couple of minutes wondering what happened to him. I had to find out so I walked out of the room and approached the first nurse I saw.

"Excuse me, do you know what happened to the patient who was in that room," I asked gesturing my hand in the direction of Mr Lang's room. The nurse nodded.

"Yes he's been transferred to another ward… I think he's on the third floor," she replied kindly.

"Why?" I questioned.

"We needed to make room for another patient. The night doctor signed off on it," she answered smiling. I smiled back.

"Ok, thank you". She walked away from me and I was about to follow, until I saw Bella entering Mr Lang's room. I walked to the room and stood in the doorway just watching her. Suddenly she turned around. I saw a tear rolling down her cheek, _she obviously has a close relationship with this patient._ She paused when she saw me standing in the doorway.

"He's been moved to another ward," I told her keeping all emotion from my voice. I didn't want her to yell at me again. She sighed and relief washed over her face. It was then replaced by sadness. It was times like this when I wished I could hear inside her head. _"What are you thinking Bella?"_ I questioned silently.

"Um…where is he?" she asked.

"The third floor," I replied, my voice soft. She nodded and then walked past me. As she did so her hand brushed mine lightly. A shock was sent through my body. I smiled. It felt nice to feel her warm skin on mine again. This brought memories flooding back. Images of me, brushing Bella's cheek with my fingers, holding Bella's hand, kissing Bella's soft lips, flashed across my mind. I stood there just watching these images.

When I snapped out of my daze and noticed Bella was getting into the elevator. I chased after her, this was the perfect opportunity for us to speak. When I got to the elevator the doors were closing. I shoved my arm in the way of the doors causing them to slide back open. I got into the elevator quickly and reached across Bella to press the door close button. When the door slid closed I smiled. She groaned folding her arms. This wiped the smile off my face.

"Bella," I breathed softly. She didn't answer. I started to become angry but composed myself quickly. "Bella," I spoke more loudly this time. She still didn't answer me. I had to get her to talk to me and the ride was almost over. I racked my brains thinking of what I could do and then I saw the emergency stop button. Without thinking I pushed it.

"What the hell are you doing," she hissed angrily at me. At least she was speaking to me…kind of.

"Getting you to talk to me," I said keeping myself calm. She reached across me and pressed the emergency stop button. The elevator started moving. I groaned anger starting to course through me. I pushed the button again, _there was no way I was letting her out of this elevator without speaking to me._ This thought made me smile.

"Edward in case you haven't noticed I don't want to speak to you. How many more times do I have to say it before you'll listen," she spat at me. I just continued smiling at her. She pressed the button again. Before the elevator could start moving I smashed my hand to the button. I hoped that it had broken. Bella pushed the button but nothing happened. She tried again and the elevator remained still. It had broken. My smile became bigger. _Now she doesn't have a choice, _i thought happily. Bella turned and glared at me.

"Now look what you've done."

"Sorry, I don't know my own strength," I said smiling. She groaned out loud and then started walking to the phone. I beat her there. She stopped letting out an angry scream and went and sat in the corner of the elevator. I sat opposite her.

We sat in silence. All the humour from before faded away slowly, she still wouldn't talk to me… she wouldn't even look at me. She had her head down. I desperately needed to hear her voice…or even just look into her eyes.

"Bella," I spoke softly. She didn't acknowledge me.

"Bella," I tried again, still nothing. I could feel sadness begin to crush me. I exhaled deeply trying to hold myself together.

"Bella…will you please just,…will you…please talk to me," I could hear the pain in my voice. I didn't care that she could hear it. I would do anything to get her to speak, or even look at me. I heard her breathing become more rapid and her heart rate increased. But she still didn't speak to me.

"Will you look at me at least?" I asked. I stared intently at her. I was about to turn away until I noticed that she raised her head. Our eyes met and we stared into each others eyes. The moment was intense, but I could've stayed like that forever. Apparently Bella didn't feel the same, she tore her eyes from mine and looked back down at her hands. I let out a deep sigh. Then something happened I didn't expect. Bella spoke to me.

"So…uh…Edward how have you been?" she asked. It was a superficial topic but at least she wasn't yelling at me. I would take superficial.

"Ok," I answered "How about you?"

"Um…fine," she said awkwardly. I nodded my head. It became silent. I wanted to keep her talking so I asked the first thing that came to my head.

"So when did you become friends with a werewolf?" I queried my voice angrier than I intended. This anger didn't go unnoticed by Bella.

"A while," she answered, her voice bitter and unkind. This sent a wave of worry through me.

"Bella, do have any idea how dangerous werewolves are? And your not only friends with him you live with him as well," I said worry in my voice. Her face became angry.

"Oh and hanging out with a bunch of vampires was completely safe," she snapped. This caused the worry inside of me to be replaced by anger. My face became hard and I spoke without thinking about what I was about to say.

"That's not what I was saying. It's just,…don't you remember the promise you made me. You said you wouldn't do anything reckless. Did you keep that promise at all?" I snapped back my voice cold. She turned to me her eyes were icy and hard. She stood up tears falling down her face. _"Shit, what have I done,"_ I asked myself. I immediately wished that I could take back the words I said. It was too late the damage was done.

"DON'T YOU DARE ACCUSE ME OF BREAKING MY PROMISE. UNLIKE YOU I KEEP MINE. UNLIKE YOU WHEN I SAY I LOVE YOU I MEAN IT," she yelled her voice hard and cold. She was actually scaring me a little. The words she spoke crashed into me sending pain through my body. She still thought that I didn't love her. I wanted to correct her but before I could she cut me off.

"AND LEAVE JAKE OUT OF THIS. UNLIKE YOU HE WOULD NEVER HURT ME. HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME." These words caused the pain to intensify. If I could cry I would be now. Bella walked over to the emergency stop button and smashed her fist to it. It worked the elevator started moving. I stood and walked to Bella, I had to tell her that I loved her before it was too late.

"Bella," I whispered softly. I prayed that she would listen to me. She wasn't going to.

"FUCK OFF EDWARD. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THIS TO ME. AT LEAST JAKE WAS THERE,...AT LEAST HE…HE TRIED TO-," she yelled pausing at the end. I forgot all about what I wanted to say to her. I had to find out what she was talking about.

"Tried to what," I asked.

"Nothing. Just leave me alone," she whispered wiping her tears away with the back of her hand. I wasn't going to let this go. I had to find out what had happened. Before I could speak again though the elevator came to a stop and Bella ran out the doors. I stared at her, watching her walk…well run away from me again. I wanted to run after her but I thought I should let her calm down a bit first. I instead decided to go see Carlisle. I pushed the button of the elevator and slowly descended to the ground floor. When the elevator doors opened I ran to Carlisles office at human pace.

"Carlisle," I called as I opened the door to his office. He looked up at me, but didn't have a smile on his face like he usually did. _Uh oh._

"Edward I wanted to speak to you," he said his voice serious. "I've invited Bella over tonight. I hope that won't be a problem"

"Uh…no…that's fine I guess," I shrugged. There wasn't much I could do about it now. I was actually pretty happy about it. It would mean that I could be around Bella. I smiled. Carlisle smiled also.

"I'm glad it's alright. Now Edward I wanted to speak to you about this morning… with Bella," my smile faded. He had seen our little argument earlier this morning.

"Yeah I know Carlisle, I shouldn't have yelled at her… it's just she was so frustrating," I sighed, thinking about the more recent argument that we had, luckily Carlisle didn't know about that one.

"Yes son I understand. But generally, as a rule if you want to get back with someone you don't shout at them," he said looking at me sympathetically.

"I know."

"Maybe you should go apologise. We wouldn't want things to be awkward tonight," he spoke kindly. I thought this over momentarily and decided that he was right. I should go apologise, not so much for this morning but for the argument in the elevator.

"You're right Carlisle. I'll see you later," I said and then left his office searching the ward for Bella. I walked up and down the ward three times and couldn't find her anywhere. I eventually gave up and got back to work. I would go to the cafeteria when she was on lunch break.

*~*~*

At 12 o'clock when I had finished checking on my last patient I walked up to the nurses' station, hoping that they would say Bella was on lunch. There was a middle aged nurse sitting there. When I approached she looked up and smiled.

"Hi I was wondering where Bel-… I mean Nurse Swan was?" I asked using my eyes and smile to, as Bella put it, _"dazzle"_ her. It seemed to work.

"Uh…she's …gone on lunch," the nurse said kindly pointing towards the cafeteria.

"Ok thankyou very much," I said giving her a smile before I turned and rushed toward the cafeteria. When I arrived at the cafeteria doors I paused, thinking about what I was going to say to Bella. I hoped that she was alone. I didn't want an audience if she started shouting at me. I opened the doors and saw Bella sitting in the same spot as she had been the past two days. I glanced around the cafeteria and saw that it was empty. I made my way, slowly, to table and stopped when I reached it.

"Uh…Bella," I breathed trying to get her attention. She glared at me and was about to leave. I put a hand on her shoulder to stop her. Like it did this morning her touch sent a shock through my body.

"Bella…don't leave I will…after I apologise," she looked up at me shock on her face. She relaxed and reluctantly I moved my hand from her shoulder. It was warm from being in contact with her skin. She looked at me waiting for me to speak again.

"Um…ok I'm sorry about earlier. I had no right to say…what I said and…well I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Uh… ok thanks," she said and looked back at the table. I didn't leave I wanted to keep on speaking to her…I just didn't know what to say right away.

"Was there something else you wanted?" she questioned looking at me again. I searched for something else I could talk to her about.

"Um, uh I was just wondering…," I paused searching for something to ask. Suddenly it came to me. "I was just wondering if you were still ok with coming over tonight." She paused and I could tell she was thinking about what to say.

"Uh yeah, of course it will be nice to see everybody again," she said smiling at me. I noticed that it was a real smile. This made me happy. We were speaking comfortably without the yelling and screaming and Bella was actually smiling. I smiled back.

"Great, well I guess I'll see you later," I said not able to keep the joy out of my voice.

"Yeah, ok." With that I unwillingly turned and left. I decided it was better for me not to push it. I didn't want to ruin the progress that we just made. When I got to the doors I turned to look at Bella again. She was staring at me, a big smile still plastered on her face. I waved to her and she waved back. I then gently pushed the doors open and left. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. Maybe… just maybe Bella and I would be together soon.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter. I hope u liked it. Personally I loved the end little bit. **

**Anyway pls pls review**.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hey guys sorry this is a bit late. Anyway here is the next chapter I hope you like it.**

**Thanx to all my reviewers you guys are awesome.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

_He was about to speak again but before he could the elevator stopped and the doors slowly opened. I ran out leaving Edward standing alone._

I prayed that this time he didn't chase after me. I looked back and there was no sight of him. I stopped running and walked to the closest wall and leant on it. I closed my eyes and started inhaling deeply. It was then that I realised I had no idea where I was. I opened my eyes to find out and realised that I was on the second floor. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply once more trying to clear my mind before making my way to the stairs. There was no way I would ever take the elevator ever again.

After battling my way up the stairs I finally reached the third floor. About half way up I made the decision that I would never take the stairs again. I would take the elevator from now on even if it meant getting trapped inside with a selfish vampire. I opened the door to the third floor and approached the closest nurse. I put on the best smile I could.

"Hi, I was wondering where I could find a patient that was transferred here last night. His name is Mr Lang," I asked politely.

"Um in that room," she said pointing to a door three rooms up.

"Thank you," I said smiling and then went towards the room. When I got to the room I entered slowly. Mr Lang turned and grinned at me.

"Nurse Swan, what are you doing up here?" he asked

"Oh, I just wanted to come and say goodbye to my favourite patient," this made his smile bigger.

"Great can you stay around and talk for a while?" he asked me his face full of hope. I had to say yes to him. How could I not? He had no-one else and plus it meant I wouldn't run into Edward.

"Of course," I replied and then went and sat on the chair next to the bed.

*~*~*

I sat and spoke to Mr Lang for hours. I didn't think of Edward at all. My mind was clear the whole time. Unfortunately it came to an end. At about 9 o'clock I reluctantly said goodbye to Mr Lang.

I was back in the ICU now and the fight with Edward in the elevator kept running through my mind. I tried to distract myself with work but it wasn't working. Anger dripped from every part of my body. I wished that it had never happened. I was supposed to go to the Cullen's tonight but I couldn't now, not after the argument. This made me even angrier. I was looking forward to seeing Esme again and now because of Edward I couldn't go. I was dreading telling Carlisle that I had to pull out of tonight. He would be so disappointed. I really didn't want to do that to him.

At 11:30 am I decided to take my lunch break. There was no point in me working at that moment, I was too pre-occupied. I would go to lunch and try to wipe the whole _"Edward"_ incident from my mind, so I could concentrate on work when I came back. I walked to the nurse's station and told Nurse Jones.

"Um…I'm going to take my lunch break now," I smiled at her politely and walked away. I heard her mutter something in response but I don't know what. I wasn't really paying much attention. I dawdled to the cafeteria. When I arrived I grabbed a lasagne and juice and went and sat at my table. The argument kept playing in my mind and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get rid of it. Edward's voice kept shouting in my head.

"_Bella do you have any idea how dangerous werewolves are"_

"_You said you wouldn't do anything reckless. Did you keep that promise at all?"_

At this I groaned in anger and pushed my food away. There was no way I could eat. I was too angry. _How dare he accuse me of breaking my promise when he broke his first. He has absolutely no idea. Why does he even care? Why does it matter to him if I'm in danger? Why would he care if I did anything reckless? He left me, he has no say in my life anymore. He…._

"Uh Bella," a velvety voice breathed pulling me from my thoughts, it was Edward. I groaned internally and turned my head glaring at him. I started to stand up to leave but before I could Edward put his hand on my shoulder holding me down. This sent a shock through my body freezing me to my seat. There was no way I could move now.

"Bella…don't leave I will…after I apologise," he spoke softly. _Wait, what…did he just say apologise_. I looked at him in shock. I couldn't concentrate on being angry anymore. I could still feel his hand on my shoulder. It felt like a block of ice. Usually people would pull away but I actually relaxed at his touch…at that moment it felt right, I never wanted him to let go. Unfortunately just as this thought popped in my head, he slowly pulled his hand away. This caused me to remember why he was here and I looked up at him.

"Um… ok I'm sorry about earlier.I had no right to say…what I said and…well I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Uh… ok thanks," I said and looked back at the table waiting for him to leave. He didn't. I looked up at him. The shock from his touch was starting to fade away and the anger was starting to seep back.

"Was there something else you wanted?" I questioned.

"Um, uh I was just wondering,… I was just wondering if you were still ok with coming over tonight." He smiled his crooked smile and from that moment I was lost. He was smiling my smile. This caused all the anger and hurt from today to melt away. I was in a daze,…I could actually feel happiness start to flow through me. It felt weird,…in a good way. I felt almost lighter. There was no way I could say no to him now.

"Uh yeah, of course it will be nice to see everybody again," I said smiling. It was a real smile too. I watched as Edward's face became happier and he flashed me another breathtaking smile. If I hadn't been sitting at that instant I would've definitely fallen over.

"Great, well I guess I'll see you later," he said, joy in his voice.

"Yeah, ok," I whispered. He turned and left. I stared at him still in a daze. I couldn't believe what just happened. We actually talked without arguing. I still had a goofy smile on my face when he turned around. He smiled and waved. I waved back and then he was gone. I could feel all the anger and resentment from the past four years start to drip away. Maybe Edward did have some small feelings for me. I sat there in a daze just thinking about…Edward.

*~*~*

I eventually decided that I had to get to work. So reluctantly I walked back to the nurse's station. I replayed the conversation that Edward and I had over and over again. When I arrived I was in such a daze that I didn't even see that there was someone standing there. The person coughed twice and I was pulled from my daze. I looked up and saw that there was a beautiful…vampire staring back at me. She had strawberry blonde hair with topaz eyes. She was tall and thin. Everything about her was perfect. I could feel what was left of my self-esteem shrink.

"Hello I'm looking for Dr Cullen," she almost sung. Her voice sounded like the soft tinkling of bells. I felt an emotion that I hadn't felt in…well ever really course through me. It was jealousy. I pushed it to the back of my mind and smiled at her kindly. Maybe she wanted to see Carlisle.

"Um of course…which one were you after," I asked my voice trembling slightly. _"Not Edward, Not Edward,"_ I chanted over and over in my head. I held my breath waiting for her answer.

"Edward". I exhaled deeply, my breath making a whoosh sound. I decided to be positive for the moment…,_maybe she was just a friend_. I clung to this praying that it was true.

"Yes of course…um…may I ask how you know him?" I questioned my voice sharper than I intended.

"Certainly. I am Tanya Denali. I'm,…how do I say this,…a _good friend_ of Edward's," she giggled and I knew exactly what she meant by _"good friend"_. My body became numb as I processed what she said. All the joy, happiness and hope from lunch trickled away leaving me hollow. I felt my face crumple but at that moment I didn't care. I scolded myself for being so idiotic. It was stupid to think that Edward could have any sort of feelings for me,…I'm just a plain boring human. Of course he had someone else. Of course he had a vampire girlfriend. _He was just being polite today when he spoke to me._ _I was and will never be good enough for Edward_. I felt my heart begin to fall to pieces. Tanya coughed again.

"Um…do you know where he is?" she asked eyeing me carefully. _"Good one Bella now Edwards' girlfriend thinks you are crazy," _I yelled in my head. I looked up at Tanya and put on my best fake smile.

"I will just find out for you," I said politely. I walked over to Nurse Jones debating whether I should just go back to Tanya and say that he's not here. I eventually decided that I couldn't do that.

"Carol do you have any idea where the young Dr Cullen is?" I asked secretly hoping she didn't. She turned to me and her eyes lit up. Apparently she had a little crush on Edward, if I weren't so crushed I might have laughed. She nodded her head. _Damn._

"Yes he's in his father's office," she replied. At the end she giggled like a little school girl.

"Thanks," I muttered and then walked back over to Tanya. She seemed to be getting a bit impatient but when she saw me she became excited.

"Dr Cullen is in his fathers office. I could show you where that is if you would like," I said bitterness starting to wash through my voice. I hoped that she wouldn't need my help. Unfortunately she did.

"Yes that would be nice, thank you," her tinkly voice sung. I smiled, cursing her in my head.

"Of course follow me," I said and headed towards Carlisles office. When we arrived I knocked gently on the door.

"Come in," Edward spoke sounding bored. I felt every muscle in my body tense, I wanted to run away but for some reason my legs wouldn't let me. I opened the door slowly. I heard Edward gasp.

"Dr Cullen your girlfriend is here to see you," I said venom dripping in my voice. Confusion crossed his face and then understanding quickly replaced it.

"Bel-," he started but before he could finish he was interrupted by Tanya.

"Oh Eddie how I've missed you," she sang and ran over to him and touched her lips to his. At that point I exited the room as fast as I could. I couldn't watch him kiss another woman. I heard him coming after me.

"Bella, Bella," his smooth velvety voice called behind me. I didn't stop. I felt him arrive next to me and he walked with me.

"Bella will you please stop,…let me explain," he asked, I didn't stop.

"Bella," he breathed his voice soft and pained. He grabbed hold of my arm causing me to stop. I ignored the shock that his touch sent through me.

"Edward its fine, you don't have to explain. We're not together anymore," I whispered hurt in my voice. His face became sad. I guessed that this was because he felt sorry for me.

"Bella plea-," I cut him off. I didn't want to hear what he had to say. It was one thing knowing that he loved someone else. It was a totally different thing hearing him admit he loved someone else. I became angry that he felt the need to rub it in my face

"Dr Cullen," I spat viciously, "I get it, go,…go be with your…distraction," I snapped. I then turned abruptly and hurried away not waiting to see his reaction. That was one of the things he had said to me that day in the forest. He said that he would have his_"distractions"_ and apparently he did. I just didn't realise his _"distractions"_ would affect me. As soon as I was away from the Edward the anger vanished and I was numb again. When I got to the nurses station I buried myself in work trying to forget everything.

*~*~*

I can't really remember what happened after the Tanya and Edward situation. I was too numb to register what was going on. It was like I was a zombie. I was relieved when Nurse Jones told me that I could finish my shift a bit early. She didn't say why but my guess was that I was depressing her. I hurried outside just wanting this day to be over. I froze when I saw a familiar car parked in front of the hospital entrance. It was Emmett's Jeep and sitting in the drivers' seat grinning at me like an idiot was Emmett. Despite my bad mood I smiled back, I couldn't help it his grin was so contagious. I walked slowly over to him and stopped next to his car.

"Emmett, what are you doing here?" I asked confused. He rolled his eyes.

"Well Carlisle mentioned you were coming over this afternoon so I thought you might need a lift." _Oh crap,_ I'd forgotten about that. _There was no way I could go now._

"Um…actually Em-," I started before I was cut off by his booming voice.

"Oh come on Bella don't bail on us again. We all really want to see you,…come on please. Don't punish us all because my brothers an idiot," he pleaded. I thought this over. It was funny seeing Emmett so serious, I'd never seen him like that before.

"Please Bella, if not for me do it for Esme. She misses you." He knew my weakness,…there was no way I could let down Esme. I missed her too.

"Ok, fine. On one condition you lose the serious act it doesn't suit you," I said smiling. He laughed his loud booming laugh.

"Done," he said in-between laughs. "I guess it's back to picking on you". He had stopped laughing and was now grinning at me evilly. I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"Ok, Em I'll see you there. I've got to go home and get changed". He nodded and then quickly gave me directions to his house. They were fairly easy and I picked them up quickly. I smiled and waved goodbye as he sped off. I rushed to my car, actually excited to go to the Cullen's tonight. I decided I would just ignore Edward and Tanya. I stepped into my car and accelerated out of the car park leaving the hospital far behind me.

When I got home I noticed that Charlie's car wasn't there and all the house lights were off. I breathed a sigh of relief that meant that Jake, Charlie and Seth weren't home, which meant I wonuldn't have to explain to them where I was going. I ran into the house and jumped into the shower. I didn't stay in as long as I usually would've because I had to get out of there before any of the guys got back. When I was finished in the shower I ran to my room and looked for something to wear. Nothing was nice enough so I just settled on jeans and a blouse.

When I was dressed I ran to the kitchen and wrote a quick note to Jake saying I was going to a friend's house and I would be back later. I then rushed outside to the car and sped out of the driveway. When I was a couple hundred metres from the house I slowed down. It was then that I started to become nervous. I was actually going to the Cullens house.

*~*~*

**Ok so that was the chapter I hope you liked it. I'm sorry that there was still no explanation bout Ben and Angela. But dw that will b in the next chapter or the one after that so it won't be that long a wait**

**Anyway pls pls review.**


	12. Chapter 12

**A:N/ Hey guys so sorry this chapter took so long, it was just because it was Christmas. But dw the updates will b more often. I hope u all had a very merry Christmas.**

**Anyway I hope u enjoy the chapter.**

**Thanx to all the reviewers, u r all awesome. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

I walked slowly back to Carlisles office. Bella's smiling face crossed my mind over and over again. It was, however, quickly replaced by images of me kissing Bella. I stood still for a second just enjoying the pictures. I then quickly pushed them to the back of my mind. There was no point in getting too carried away. When I reached Carlisles office I knocked lightly on the door. There was no answer. The middle aged nurse from the nurse's station walked towards me. I could see images in her head of me and her…doing things. I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing. She stopped in front of me.

"Um, your father is with a patient at the moment. Would you like me to tell him that you are looking for him," she almost purred. I think that she was trying to seduce me. I bit my lip even harder at that thought

"Thank you but I'll wait for him," I muttered, making sure to not open my mouth too much, I didn't want to laugh in her face. I smiled at her kindly and opened the door to Carlisles office. I snapped the door shut quickly so the nurse wouldn't follow me in. I should've been flattered by the attention that I got from her but I wasn't, the only attention I wanted,…needed,…craved was Bella's.

I walked to Carlisles desk and sat down on the chair behind it. Images of Bella started entering my head again. This time I didn't push them away. Carlisle wasn't there and I didn't have any other way to fill the time. I smiled as an image of Bella blushing appeared. I leaned back and watched the movie in my head.

I was pulled from my own thoughts when I heard a soft knock on the door. This annoyed me a little. I was having a good time imagining Bella.

"Come in," I said. The person pushed the door open slowly. When I saw who it was I gasped. It was Bella. I was about to smile and then I heard the thoughts of somebody familiar….

"Dr Cullen your girlfriend is here to see you," Bella spat, venom in her voice. I was confused, she said girlfriend. I listened to the thoughts of the other person and realised it was Tanya. I listened as she remembered what she had said to Bella earlier. I groaned internally. She was lying of course, there was no way I could date somebody else. I had to tell Bella what was going on.

"Bel-," I started but before I could finish Tanya interrupted me.

"Oh Eddie how I've missed you," she sang as she ran over to me. She stopped centimetres from me and touched her lips to mine. I looked at Bella, who quickly turned and exited room. At that point I pushed Tanya off me and went after Bella.

"Bella, Bella," I called. She didn't turn or stop so I ran to catch up to her. When I caught up I walked beside her. She didn't acknowledge me.

"Bella will you please stop,…let me explain," I almost begged. She still didn't stop. I felt sadness and pain wash through me.

"Bella," I breathed softly. I grabbed her arm forcing her to stop. A tingling sensation coursed through my arm at her touch. She looked at me.

"Edward its fine, you don't have to explain. We're not together anymore," she whispered. My face crumpled in pain, I knew that we weren't together anymore but it still hurt to hear her say it. I had to tell her that I still loved her.

"Bella plea-," she cut me off. I saw her face become slightly angry. I didn't understand why.

"Dr Cullen," she spat viciously, "I get it, go,…go be with your…distraction". I stood frozen for a moment comprehending what Bella said. If I wasn't a vampire I would have fallen to the ground from the pain that coursed through me. I wasn't sure what hurt more, the fact that Bella didn't love me anymore or that she thought that I could love somebody else.

I'm not sure how long I was frozen for but when I snapped out of it Bella was gone. I sighed. Suddenly a new emotion started pulsing through me. It was anger, no wait, it was fury. I was furious at Tanya for ruining the progress that Bella and I made. I stormed back to Carlisles office and slammed the door shut behind me. Tanya, who was sitting in Carlisles chair, looked up at me grinning. I snarled at her, which wiped the grin off her face.

"Tanya what the hell do you think you're doing?" I growled. Tanya rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on Edward I was just having some fun, lighten up," she laughed. Her laughter rang in my ears, causing me to become more furious. At that moment I wanted to rip her to pieces. I clenched my fists and breathed deeply to calm myself down.

"Fun?" I hissed through my teeth, "you call ruining any chance I had with Bella fun?" Tanya shrugged.

"Well…yeah," she said smugly. I growled at her. It didn't seem to have any affect because she got up from her seat and ran to me. She pressed her lips to mine again. I pushed her away from me again, but this time I did so with such force that she flew into the wall. She crashed into the wall with a loud thud that caused the wall to vibrate. I could see a tiny crack in the wall but luckily that was it, there was no permanent damage done. I glared at Tanya.

"Tanya when are you going to get that I don't want to be with you," I asked my voice sharp. She just smiled. _"What the hell is up with her?"_ I questioned silently.

"Edward, when are you going get that I'm your only option?" she asked her face becoming cold. An evil smile played at her lips. "When are you going to get that Bella doesn't want to be with you," she added. A snarl racked through my body. I was about to pounce on her when somebody grabbed my arms holding me back. I twisted my head to see Carlisle holding my arms his expression and thoughts disappointed.

I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply, calming myself. It worked, all the muscles in my body relaxed, and although I was still furious with Tanya I no longer wanted to attack her. Carlisle must have felt me relax because he let go of my arms. I turned to look at him, he was staring at me.

"Edward I think you should go home," he said. I opened my mouth to argue but he held up his hand and I stayed silent.

"Edward you are in no condition to work. Go home and prepare yourself for our guest," he said his voice soft and kind. Yet there was an authority behind his words that forced me to listen.

"Fine, but I'm not sure that our guest is still coming," I mumbled and left the room. The joy and happiness from lunch time had all disappeared leaving me feeling deflated. I sulked all the way to my car; I didn't even try to put a fake smile on my face. I just succumbed to the hurt that burned inside me.

When I got too my car I jumped in and accelerated as fast as I could away from the hospital. I thought the drive would clear my head, it didn't. The whole ride home I couldn't get Bella out of my head. _"Go be with your distraction,"_ her voice screamed at me over and over.

As I pulled into our driveway I slowed down. I parked the car in front of the house and hurried out of the car and through the front door. I walked slowly to the couch and plopped down. Alice came rushing down the stairs, her eyes shining bright and a huge grin on her face, she was excited that Bella was coming over. The smile faded and her eyes dulled when she saw me. _"What's wrong?" _she questioned silently.

"Tanya," I growled, anger pulsing through me again. Alice groaned and then came and sat beside me.

"What has she done now?" she asked annoyance in her voice. This wasn't the first time that Tanya had tried something. The whole family was aware of her…infatuation with me.

"She told Bella that we are dating," I hissed through my teeth, "and she kissed me…in front of Bella". Alice's face became annoyed.

"So you think…," she whispered, I finished the sentence for her.

"That Bella won't be visiting tonight,…Yeah". At this point Emmett entered the room. He looked between Alice and I, searching for an explanation to what was just said.

"Why isn't Bella coming over?" he asked, a hint of anger in his voice, "what have you done now?" he stared at me.

"I haven't done anything Emmett, it was Tanya," I snapped at him, annoyed that he assumed it was my fault that Bella wasn't coming over. Understanding crossed his face.

"What did she do this time?" he sighed.

"She told Bella that we are dating, and she kissed me in front of Bella," I said my voice bitter. Emmett nodded.

"So you think she won't come over anymore," he asked. I sighed and nodded.

"Not if I have anything to say about it," he mumbled and ran upstairs. I heard him rummaging around and then he came sprinting back down the stairs, keys in hand. I looked into his head but I couldn't understand what he was planning because his thoughts were changing so quickly, it was just a jumble of words.

"Emmett what are you doing?" I questioned, curiously. He grinned at me and then at Alice. I glanced at Alice who was grinning to.

"I'm going to make sure that Bella comes over," he said grinning at me once more before sprinting out the door.

"Excellent," Alice mumbled jumping up from the couch. She then jogged up the stairs leaving me alone.

*~*~*

I sat on the couch waiting patiently for Emmett to return. Rosalie, who was now sitting with me, sighed in boredom. She picked up the remote for the TV and began flicking through the channels. After ten minutes of flicking I glared at her, it was very annoying. She looked at me.

"What?" she snapped.

"Is that really necessary?" I asked glancing at the remote and then back at her. She opened her mouth to reply but before she could I put my hand up to silence her, it worked she closed her mouth. I heard Emmett's Jeep come to a halt in the driveway. I listened to his thoughts to try and determine what happened with Bella, but I couldn't figure anything out; Emmett had become good at blocking his thoughts from me. I watched the door in anticipation, Emmett banged it open. He looked at me a huge smile on his face.

"I've got your back bro". I smiled and I heard Rosalie laugh beside me.

"So, she's coming?" I asked, not even bothering to hide the excitement. He nodded. I let out a relieved laugh. Bella was coming to my house which meant I could speak to her. I would tell her everything, no matter what she said, I would tell her that I was in love with her and that I still want her.

"Thanks Em," I said, smiling at him once more before I sprinted up to my room. I had to get ready for Bella.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter. I know that not much happened but dw the next chapter will b more eventful. N u will find out about Ben n Angela nxt chapter I promise.**

**I hope u liked it. Pls, pls review.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hey guys Happy New Year. My new years present to u is not only one but two chapters…yes two. It was going to be one chapter but then it got to long so I made it two. **

**Thanx again for all the fabulous reviews.**

**Anyway read. I hope u enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

As I got closer to the Cullen's house I became more nervous. I was hoping the drive would calm my nerves, unfortunately it did the opposite. The closer I got to the Cullen's house the more nervous I would become. When I was turning into their driveway my nerves got the better of me. My heart started to race, thudding hard against my chest and my breathing became shallow. I came to a halt momentarily and composed myself, preparing for whatever may happen. When my heart rate and breathing had returned to normal I started the car and drove slowly down the long driveway. As I pulled up to the house I couldn't help but stare. It was one of the most beautiful houses I had ever seen, it was almost an exact replica of the house they had in Forks. I brought the car to a stop and paused momentarily to admire the wonder that was in front of me. I stepped slowly out of the car. As I did so all the nerves I had felt on the drive over seemed to evaporate. I felt oddly comfortable. This house, all of it, felt familiar. Kind of like déjà vu except_,_ of course,_ this time Edward didn't…._

Before I could dwell on this thought two ice cold arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me into a bone-crushing hug. I recognised who it was immediately. There was only a select few people who could hug like that.

"Hey Emmett," I laughed. He boomed a laugh as he put me down.

"Bella," he said smiling. His face then became serious and he began looking me up and down. This worried me so I looked down to make sure that I was wearing pants, thankfully I was. I looked back up at Emmett who still had a serious look on his face. _"Ok what's going on here?"_ I thought, becoming curious. Emmett must have noticed because he spoke.

"Bella," he sighed.

"What?" I asked, worry dripping in my voice.

"What are you wearing?" he asked. I looked back down at what I wearing, panic rising in me. _If Emmett was commenting on my clothing it must be pretty serious_. I glanced back at Emmett whose face was still serious.

"I…uh…well…um," I stuttered. Emmett burst into laughter. I didn't understand why.

"Bella…I…was…messing with you," he said between laughs, "you look fine". I glared at him; I didn't see how it was funny. He looked at me and tried to stop laughing. He failed horribly.

"Honestly Bella you should have seen your face it was priceless," he managed to spit out before succumbing to another round of hysterical laughter.

"I'm glad I can be of service to you," I muttered angrily. By this time he had stopped laughing, he was grinning at me instead.

"Oh, Bella I have missed you," he said letting out a solitary chuckle. He then pulled me into another bone-crushing hug. All the annoyance that I felt was gone in that moment. _The truth was that I would rather have Emmett here and making fun of me than not have Emmett in my life at all_.

"Yeah Em, I've missed you too," I whispered, smiling as he put me down.

"Ok let's go see the others," he said turning and walking toward the big white house. I followed. When we got to the door he pushed it open and entered the house. I hesitated momentarily, composing myself, and then did the same. When I got in I noticed that all of the Cullens and, to my disappointment, Tanya were watching me.

Esme and Carlisle were standing close to the door smiling at me. I walked over to them, pausing when I was about a metre away. Without thinking I threw my arms around Esme's neck, hugging her. She wrapped her arms around my waist and hugged me back. A wave of sadness crashed over me. When Esme had left it was like I was losing my second mum, I hadn't realised how much that hurt until that moment. A solitary tear escaped my eye and slid slowly down my cheek. I quickly rubbed it away on my shoulder, hoping that no-one noticed.

"It's great to see you again dear, things haven't been the same without you," she whispered in my ear.

"It's good to see you too," I muttered as I let go of her neck. She took her arms from my waist and then looked at me, smiling kindly. I smiled back and then turned to Carlisle. He placed an arm around my shoulder pulling me in for a one armed hug.

"I'm so glad you decided to come, Bella," Carlisle said kindly.

"Yeah me too," and I was actually telling the truth. I was glad to see all of them again. He let go of me and I turned to look at the others. Alice and Edward were standing, staring at me, their faces hopeful. I skipped over them and instantly turned my gaze to the couch, where Rosalie and Jasper were sitting. They were both looking at me and smiling kindly. _Wait a second is Rosalie Cullen smiling,… at me?_ I asked myself, confused as to why. I felt someone come and stand beside me.

"I told you that we _all_ missed you," Emmett murmured softly and then went and sat next to Rosalie, who was now looking anywhere but at me. She must have realised what she was doing. I laughed softly and so did everyone else. I turned my gaze to Jasper who was staring at me. I smiled and waved, he did the same but there was something off about it. He looked…almost guilty. _What's that about? _I wondered silently. Before I could ponder it any further, two cold arms picked me up off the ground and started carrying me somewhere. I knew who it was instantly, it was Alice.

"Alice, what are you doing?" all the Cullen's yelled, confirming my suspicions. Before I could even comprehend what was happening we had stopped and I was placed softly on a bed. I looked up at Alice who was staring at me.

"Alice, what the hell are you doing?" I hissed at her. She shrugged and then smiled.

"Getting you to talk to me," she said nonchalantly, as if what she just did was completely normal. Anger started to pulse through me, this was the second time today that I had been forced to talk to someone.

"What is with you Cullens?" I asked. "You know generally if you want to talk to someone you don't kidnap them," I muttered angrily.

"Well you wouldn't talk to me any other way". I leaned back on the bed, resting my head on a pillow. I came to the conclusion that if I was going to be there for a while I may as well be comfortable. Alice sighed and walked to the other side of the bed. She sat down. We sat in silence for a while until finally Alice broke it.

"I've missed you Bella," she whispered so softly that I almost didn't hear it. She sounded like a completely different person. I sat up and turned to look at her. She was staring at the bed, her face sad. At that moment I could no longer be angry at her, I missed her so much.

"I've missed you too," I murmured softly. Alice lifted her gaze from the bed and faced me.

"Oh Bella," she sang her voice returning to normal, "I am so sorry". She wrapped her arms around my neck and crushed her body against mine. I wrapped my arms around her waist. A smile crossed my face; it felt nice to hug Alice again.

"It's alright Alice I forgive you," I mumbled into her shoulder.

After a couple minutes she let go of me and jumped of the bed. She was back, to her normal, hyper self. I laughed at her.

"Ok let's go back down stairs," she said grinning at me. I nodded my head.

"Ok as long as you promise that you'll let me walk," I said. She laughed and then nodded her head. She was just about to turn, but I stopped her before she could.

"Hey Alice, what was wrong with Japer?" I asked. Her face became sad.

"You noticed that?" she asked. I nodded. "Well Bella he kinda,…well he blames himself for what happened…with you and Edward". I shook my head in confusion.

"Why, that's ridiculous…it's not his fault that Edward doesn't love me," I said. Alice nodded in agreement.

"I know, I told him that it wasn't his fault but he still blames himself."

"Ok, well I'm not sure if it will help. But tell him that I don't blame him," I said, Alice nodded and then smiled again.

"Ok now let's go back down stairs," she sang. She exited out into the hallway and I followed.

We walked back down stairs and joined the rest of the Cullens. I could feel Edwards gaze on me the whole way but I ignored it. I followed Alice and sat down beside her.

"Bella," the familiar velvety voice said. Thankfully my phone rang before he could say anymore.

"Sorry, I've got to take this I'll be right back," I explained to all of them. They all nodded and then I rushed outside closing the door behind me. I looked at the caller id and saw that it was Jake. "Great," I breathed and then flipped the phone open.

"Hey Jake," I said.

"Hey Bells, I got your note where are you?" he asked, I could tell from his voice that he knew exactly where I was, but as always he pretended he didn't.

"Just a friends house why?" I replied trying to dodge the question. It didn't work.

"Whose?" he questioned.

"Just a friend's," I answered, my voice harsh.

"You're at the bloodsuckers aren't you?" he snapped. I didn't answer.

"Bella," he almost growled

"Ok, yes fine. I am at the Cullens," I sighed. I heard him growl on the other end. Charlie and Seth were yelling in the background as well but I couldn't understand what they were saying.

"Bella," he groaned, "you know it's not safe…tell me where you are and I'll come over too". I scoffed, there was absolutely no way I was going to tell him where I was.

"No Jake."

"Bella," he growled becoming angry again.

"Jake I'm not telling you," I said. He groaned in defeat.

"Ok fine…just take care of yourself…and if you need anything call me ok," he urged. I nodded and then realised that he couldn't see me.

"Ok Jake I'll see you later," I replied and snapped the phone shut. I turned to make my way back inside but somebody was blocking the doorway. I groaned internally, it was Tanya.

"Hey Bella," she said kindly, this shocked me, "um…can we talk?" I stared at her.

"Um…uh…ok sure," I said. She turned and walked away from the house, I followed her. She stopped when we were fifty or so metres away from the house.

"Uh,…ok Bella I owe you an apology," she muttered. I became confused.

"Why?" I asked. It wasn't her fault that Edward loved her instead of me. She inhaled deeply.

"Well…Edward and I are not a couple," she whispered in reply. This confused me even more.

"But…you,…I don't understand…you kissed," I stuttered.

"Yes that was…well wishful thinking on my part really. We aren't together. We never have been and…never will be, he is in love with someone else," she stared at me, a smile on her face.

"Uh…um…uh," I stuttered, trying to find the right words, "thanks, I guess". She nodded and then left me standing alone. _Maybe Edward does still have feelings for me_, I thought hopeful. But, all too soon, I pushed that thought away scolding myself for even contemplating it. _Stupid Bella, just because he's not dating Tanya doesn't mean he has feelings for you,_ I screamed at myself. _Maybe you can be friends,_ I added. I stood there for a while considering this. Eventually I came to the conclusion that this was my only option. I decided that I would talk to him, after all the only reason I wasn't before was because of Tanya, and that was cleared up now.

I walked back to the house. When I got to the door I inhaled deeply and pushed it open. Everyone was staring at me. I smiled at all of them and went and sat down next to Alice. I looked around at all of them and realised that Edward wasn't there anymore. I was just about to ask where he was when I heard a familiar melody fill the room, it was my lullaby.

I gazed around, looking for the source but couldn't find it anywhere. Alice must have realised what I was doing because she answered my unasked question.

"He's in there," she whispered pointing to a closed door across the room.

"Thanks," I muttered and stood up. I headed towards the closed door. I could feel all the Cullens staring at me. When I got to the door I wrapped my fingers around the handle and twisted it gently, pushing the door open. I closed the door softly behind me. When I turned to look at Edward he was staring at me. I walked slowly, over to him and sat down on a chair near the piano. His gaze never left me. I sat, silent, just letting the beautiful melody fill my head. I closed my eyes and lost myself in the song completely. It felt like I was floating on a cloud. I smiled, I hadn't felt this carefree in a long time, it was nice. Unfortunately it had to come to an end.

As Edward's finger struck the last key I slowly opened my eyes. His eyes were glued on me. I stared back.

"Hey," I whispered a small smile on my face.

"Hi," he said his mouth turning into a smile also. We stayed silent for a moment just staring at each other.

"So,…uh…I talked to Tanya and she explained… the situation," I said looking away from him, I felt kind of bad about what I had said. "I'm …uh,…sorry for what I said," I whispered.

"It's fine," he muttered. I looked back at him and our gazes locked together again. We sat staring into each others eyes for what felt like an eternity. I was having an internal battle. Part of me wanted to run over to Edward right now and kiss him. The other part screamed at me, reminding me of what had happened when he left. Before I could come to a decision my phone rang. I looked at the id and saw that it was an unknown number.

"Uh…I should take this," I mumbled and then ran back through the lounge room and the front door.

"Hello."

"Hey Bella its Sam," he said. I became worried; there was something off in his voice.

"Hey Sam, what's up," I asked, worry starting to build up in me.

"Uh,…are you with Jake?" he asked avoiding my question, "I tried calling your house but nobody picked up."

"No I'm not. What's going on," I choked out. My throat began to close.

"Uh,…um,…I really don't want to be the one to tell you this Bella."

"Tell me what?" I asked my voice so soft that I wasn't sure if he had heard me.

"Uh…um…Bella it's Victoria, we caught her scent at your father's house and we think she might be on her way to Seattle…."

I didn't hear a word he said after that. Images of red hair and evil eyes flashed across my mind. My body became numb as I crumpled to the ground. The phone slipped from my hand and fell to the ground with a thud.

Victoria was coming after me…again.

*~*~*

**Oh no Victoria again. What does she want?**

**Neway that was the chapter I hope u liked it. **

**Pls review and then read the next chapter ******

**O btw the next chapter u find out bout Ben and Angela.**


	14. Chapter 14

**As promised here is chapter 14. I hope u enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

I don't know how long I sat there frozen, but when I snapped out of it I realised that I was no longer alone. Edward was kneeling beside me.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he breathed reaching his hand out to me. I flinched away from him and jumped up. Deep down I knew this action was irrational, but at that moment I was scared. I looked around and noticed that all the Cullens were outside.

"Uh…I've got to go," I said and began running towards the car. I heard someone running behind me.

"Bella wait, what's wrong?" he asked concern etched in his face.

"Nothing Edward," I lied. He saw right through this

"Bella I know there's something wrong, please tell me maybe I can help," he begged.

"You can't," I replied, more viciously than I intended.

"Please Bella I want to help," he breathed, his velvety voice pained. _Sure now you want to help,_ I thought angrily to myself. Anger started to course through me. All the feelings that had been left to manifest over the four years came rushing back to me at once. This turned the anger into fury and I exploded, letting it all out.

"WHY?" I yelled turning to face him, "WHY Edward. WHY do you want to help? WHY do you even care?" He opened his mouth to speak but I cut him off.

"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO LEFT ME,…YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAID THAT YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME,…YOU WERE THE ONE THAT LEFT ME BROKEN…WHY…DO...YOU…CARE," I screamed, tears starting to spill from my eyes.

"BECAUSE I LIED," he shouted. I froze in my spot.

"Wh-what," I stuttered.

"I lied Bella," he said more quietly this time. "When I told you I didn't love you, that I didn't want you, I lied". I shook my head, he had to be lying. He was taunting me.

"St-stop l-l-ying," I stammered. He shook his head his eyes desperate for me to believe him.

"I'm not lying, Bella," he said his voice urgent. "I love you,…I always have and always will. You are my life, my reason for existence…When I left there wasn't a minute that I didn't think about you, there wasn't a minute that you weren't in my heart". He stared in my eyes, his eyes pleading for me to believe him. I didn't speak, I couldn't, I had no idea if he was telling the truth or not. Edward walked toward me his hand outstretched. I stepped back from him making him drop his hand. My whole body started to shake uncontrollably.

"Bella," he sighed, "I know I hurt you and I am sincerely sorry for that, but I am here now and I can help…I'm here for you". I scoffed, _he's here for me yeah right, _I thought angrily. It was too late for that.

"IT'S TOO LATE EDWARD," I screamed. "It's too late for I'm sorry and I am here, it's too late for I love you and I care about you. IT'S TOO LATE".

"Bella please," he begged. His voice was so hoarse that it sounded like he had been crying for days. It was weird hearing him like that but at that moment I didn't care; I needed to tell him how much he hurt me.

"No Edward, I loved you…I still do… and you just left,…you just left, you weren't there. You say you're here for me now…but where were you when it mattered, where were you when I needed you. Where were you when I was lying in the forest, hurt and broken? Where were you when I cried myself to sleep almost every night? Where were you when Laurent came for me in our meadow?" He growled as soon as he heard the name and he looked down at me with sorrow in his eyes, his face contorted in pain. I looked away from him, tears still streaming down my cheeks.

"Where were you when I found out that Jake was a werewolf? Where were you when I learned that vampires weren't the only mythical creature that existed? Where were you when,…when I found out that Victoria wanted to kill me?" Edward let out a deafening snarl as soon as the name left my lips, I ignored that and continued.

"And finally where were you…wh-wh-when…she…." I stopped there, I couldn't speak anymore. Nothing would come out. I could still feel my body shaking and I was surprised that I was still standing. I glanced up and realised that Edward was standing right in front of me.

"When she what, Bella?" he asked his voice still hoarse. I hesitated and then….

"Wh-When she came after me…and k-killed…Angela and Ben," I breathed. My knees gave way and I collapsed to the ground. My body became numb and everything around me seemed to fade. My mind flashed back to the most horrible day of my life.

_Flashback_

"_Hey Bells?" Charlie called. He was in the kitchen so I walked in there. _

"_Yeah Dad," I said as I walked through the kitchen door. I looked up and saw that my father wasn't alone. Jacob was standing next to him. "Oh hi Jake," I added._

"_Hey Bells," he replied._

"_Ok, what's going on?" I asked eyeing them both suspiciously. Whenever those two got together it usually meant something was going on._

"_Uh…Bells me and Jake were talking and we don't think it's such a good idea for you to stay home alone,…we think someone from the pack should stay," Charlie said to me. I sighed, we had had this conversation before and I had told them both that it would be fine. Ever since Charlie found out that werewolves existed and that there was a bloodthirsty vampire after me he worried unnecessarily. I argued with Jake about telling Charlie, but apparently the pack believed it was important for Charlie to know. I think Billy was a big part of that decision. After all Charlie was his best friend and I was Charlie's daughter. I had to admit it, Charlie knowing, did make it easier for the pack to protect both of us, but it just made him worry about me too much._

"_Dad we've talked about this before. It's been months since we've seen anything, she's not here anymore. You both need to go say goodbye to Harry, don't let me stop you, I'll be fine for a couple of hours," I said. They both stared at me._

"_Bells...," my father breathed, but before he could say anymore I interrupted_

"_Ok I'll tell you what. I'll invite some friends over…they won't be werewolves but I won't be alone. What do you say?" I asked looking between them both. They looked reluctant but accepted._

"_Ok good, I'll call Ben and Angela. Now you guys better get going I'll see you later". I kissed Charlie on the cheek and hugged Jake. _

_I called Ben and Angela, who said they would be over in ten minutes. I walked up the stairs and entered my room, I felt a cool breeze on my face. I looked up to find the source and realised that my window was open,…that was weird I didn't remember opening it. I walked over and snapped it shut, looking around the room. I heard a banging from Charlies room but before I could go check it out, there was a knock on the door. I ran down stairs and pulled the door open. It was Ben and Angela._

"_Hey Bella," they said in unison smiling kindly at me. I smiled back._

"_Hey guys," I said, motioning for them to come in, "thanks for coming over."_

"_It's ok," Angela said, another kind smile crossing her face. I walked into the lounge room and sat on the chair, they followed me. Just as Ben sat in his seat he looked to the corner of the room, confusion and worry crossing his face._

"_Hey Bells, who's that?" he asked pointing to the corner. I turned panic running through me, who would be in my house without me knowing. When my eyes landed on the figure in the corner I let out an ear-splitting scream, it was Victoria. My body started shaking uncontrollably._

"_No go away," I choked out, my throat closing in panic. I grabbed hold of Ben and Angela's arms and sprinted out of the room. I knew it was no use but I had to do something, I had to try and get Ben and Angela out of there. Victoria let out a laugh…no a cackle, a cackle that sent shivers up my spine. I heard her walking after us. This was a game to her. I got to the door and ripped it open, pushing Ben and Angela through it. I then slammed the door shut behind me and waited for Victoria to get to me._

_A wicked smile crossed her face. I gulped, I was literally staring death in the face. My head told me to run but I knew I couldn't. I had to give Ben and Angela time to get away. My legs shook uncontrollably. It took all my concentration to just stay upright. Victoria approached, her blood red eyes narrowed into slits. She stopped in front of me, still smiling wickedly, and pushed me to the ground. She opened the door,…she was going after Ben and Angela. I grabbed hold of her hand._

"_No please leave them alone," I begged. I couldn't let my friends die because of my stupidity. She ripped her arm from my grasp and walked away from me. I battled to stand up. There was a stabbing pain in my ankle but I ignored it. I chased after her, willing my legs to run. I could feel my ankle searing in pain, but I kept running. I caught up to her and grabbed hold of her arm again. I could see Angela and Ben about twenty or so metres from us._

"_Please don't hurt them, I'll come with you. Please just leave them alone," I cried, tears starting to fall from my eyes. Victoria turned to glare at me her blood red eyes, burning into me. She ripped her arm from my grasp yet again._

"_I'll get to you later," she hissed. Her voice was beautiful yet there was something evil about it. She let out another cackle. Without thinking I ran toward Ben and Angela._

"_Run!" I screamed as loud as my voice would go. They didn't run, they just stood there staring at me. I reached them._

"_Bella we can't leave you," Ben whispered and then grabbed hold of my arm tugging me away with him._

"_No, please just leave I'll be fine. You have to run," I begged. But it was too late, Victoria was there. I pushed them behind me, trying to protect them but it was no use. Victoria picked me up and threw me to the side. I crashed to the ground with a thud. I stuck my wrists out to break my fall. I heard a crack and then a searing pain travelled up my right wrist. I screamed out in pain and then glanced over at Ben and Angela. _

_Ben had both arms wrapped protectively around Angela, trying to shield her from the death that loomed. Angela had her head buried in Ben's chest and was sobbing quietly. I saw Ben kiss Angela softly on the head and whisper something in her ear. Tears began falling more rapidly from my eyes and I felt my stomach lurch, I jumped up and ran toward Victoria. I couldn't let my friends die because of me. My ankle and wrist screamed for me to stop, but I ignored it. When I was just a few feet from Victoria, my knees gave way and I collapsed to the ground. I crawled to Victoria and clung onto her legs._

"_No take me," I pleaded looking up at her, "Please". I began shaking her legs. She looked down at me and I knew that she wasn't going to let my friends go. She hit my hands away causing the pain from my wrist to spread up my entire arm. I bit down on my lip to stop from screaming. She swung her arm back again and smashed it in to my chest, causing me to fly away. I crashed to the ground again and I felt every inch of my body scream out in pain. I struggled, painfully, to my knees and looked at Ben and Angela. There eyes stared into mine, burning with life and love, and then in a flash that was gone,…they were gone, they would never laugh, never cry, never touch again. I heard the crack as Victoria snapped there necks, ending it all. She laughed in joy._

"_Nooooooo," I screamed "Ben, Angela". I jumped up and ran to them. I fell to my knees when I was next to their lifeless bodies. I grabbed hold of a hand from each of them._

"_Please, please you can't die, please," I cried. Nothing happened they were still, completely lifeless._

"_I'm so sorry," I whispered to both of them. I knew that it was pointless and that they couldn't hear me, but I had to say it. Victoria cackled again._

"_Please, please you can't die," she mocked. She came up to me and grabbed hold of my right wrist and started dragging me away. I didn't fight, there was no use. I closed my eyes, hoping that it would end quickly and then I heard someone scream my name._

"_Bella," the voice yelled, "Bella". Victoria snarled and then dropped me. I heard an animal growl and then everything went black._

_*~*~*_

_I woke to a pair of hot hands shaking me._

"_Bella,…Bella…please,…please wake up," I heard a rough voice whisper. I could feel hot droplets landing on my face._

"_Bella please…open your eyes," the person cried. I recognised the voice now, it was Jacob._

"_Jake," I whispered, my throat dry. I opened my eyes and looked into the swollen eyes of my best friend. _

"_Oh thank God," he breathed. _

"_Jake," I breathed. "Sh-sh-she,…Ben and Angela,…I tried…but…," I sobbed. Jake brought me to his chest and hugged me tight "I..., I tried"_

"_Shhh, shhh, Bells. I know, I know," he whispered softly to me. After a while all the numbness and adrenaline faded and the pain came surging back. Every inch of my body ached. I let out a small whimper of pain. Jake looked down at me and gasped, he hadn't noticed my injuries until that moment as well._

"_Shit Bells…," he gasped, "Don't worry, I'm gonna get you to a hospital…just hold on ok" He picked me up and carried me bridal style. As he carried me away I saw Ben and Angela bodies lying, lifeless on the ground. Guilt and shame washed over me,…they were dead because of me._

"_It's all, my fault," I whispered. Tears began falling again and I began crying hysterically. I buried my head in Jakes shoulder._

_End of Flashback_

I was pulled from my memories when somebody spoke. I could feel cold hands on my shoulders.

"Bella, what's your fault…what happened?" a velvety voice questioned. I opened my eyes and looked at Edward, who was now kneeling in front of me, his face just inches from mine. There were still tears streaming down my face.

"It's my fault Ben and Angela died," I whispered, more to myself then to him.

"Why, Bella? Why is it your fault?" Edward asked his voice cracking.

"Because…I told Jake and Charlie to go to Harry's funeral. I told them I wouldn't need guarding because we hadn't seen anything from Victoria for ages. I was the one who invited Ben and Angela over to my house. I was the one who put them in danger"

"What happened, Bella?" Edward asked. I answered not really aware of what I was doing,

"Victoria snuck into the house, she was waiting for us. I made Ben and Angela run and I begged her to leave them alone and take me but she wouldn't,…she wanted to kill them first. She said she would get to me later. I tried to stop her but,…but she was too strong. She threw me away…and then she,…and then she snapped their necks. She killed them…and it's all, my fault," I cried.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry," Edward sighed. He touched his finger to my cheek and wiped away the tears. "I'm sorry that you had to go through that and I'm sorry I wasn't there." He cupped his hand around my cheek. I stared into his eyes and he stared back. His eyes were like liquid gold, they were deep and searching.

"Bella, I love you," he swooned. I felt myself surrender slightly. In that moment, I was like a fly caught in a spider web, he had control over me. He leaned his head into mine, but before our lips could touch my brain caught up and I pulled away.

"No Edward, you can't just say I love you and expect everything to be ok. You can't just touch me…or kiss me and expect it to be alright. IT'S NOT ALRIGHT," I yelled.

"Bella I'm sorry."

"STOP SAYING I'M SORRY, IT'S TOO LATE…IT DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING," I screamed, jumping to my feet and taking a few paces back.

"Bella," Edward breathed getting to his feet and stepping toward me with his arm outstretched. I looked at the Cullens, whose faces were all contorted in worry, and then looked back at Edward. _I can't do this _I thought silently _I'm not ready._ Suddenly something else flashed to my head that I had completely forgotten in all this drama. Victoria was coming after me, I had to leave.

"I'm sorry Edward," I said taking a few steps away from him. "I can't do this right now…I've got to go," and with that I turned fiercely and sprinted toward my car. I jumped in and accelerated away as fast as I could.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter. Poor Bella n Ben n Angela. Neway wat did u guys think?**

**I hope u enjoyed it…well not enjoy really coz Ben n Angela died but I hope u liked reading it.**

**Pls, pls, pls review.**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hey my awesome readers. So this took a little longer than usual because our power went out and I lost some of what I had written. I had to rewrite and I did it as fast as I could. So thanx 4 being so patient … U guys r the best**

**Thanx so much 4 the awesome reviews.**

**Anyway so this is EPOV of the Cullens house, so there isn't really anything new happening. I hope u enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

I heard a car driving down the driveway. I glanced out the window and felt a tingling sensation go through my body, it was Bella. I stared at her flawless face as she slowed to a stop in front of the house. She stared at the house awe on her face, her lips turned up into a smile as she reached her hand for the car door. I turned from the window and approached the door of the house, I was going to greet Bella. Just as I extended my hand to the door handle, someone grabbed me holding me back. I spun around ferociously and glared at the culprit, Emmett.

"What the hell Em," I snapped frustrated. Emmett grinned at me.

"Given your track record I don't think you should be the one to greet her…I mean we don't want her to leave right away…Do we?" he questioned raising an eyebrow. I sighed and nodded, letting him know that I agreed. Bella would probably jump in her car as soon as she saw me. I would have to wait to talk to her. Emmett nodded his head and then ran outside. I backed away from the door and went and stood next to Alice.

I felt myself get impatient as I waited for Bella to come inside. I knew that it had only been a few minutes but I yearned to see her. I settled on listening to her voice. I didn't register anything she said, I just listened to the beautiful sounds that left her mouth. This sedated my impatience.

"Ok let's go see the others," I heard Emmett boom followed by the patter of footsteps. The tingling sensation went through my body, once again. I could hear my family thinking words of encouragement. I nodded to acknowledge that I heard them and then watched the door with anticipation. The door opened and Emmett entered followed by Bella. My eyes followed her every move.

First she walked over to Esme and Carlisle. They both greeted her but I didn't hear anything they said, I was too focused on Bella. When she finished talking to Carlisle she turned her head. I could hear Alice's excited thoughts beside me. However her thoughts quickly became sad as Bella skipped us and turned straight to Rose and Jasper. I became sad also, my face contorted in pain. She wouldn't even look at me. As Bella spoke to Japer I could hear Alice scheming. _"I know I'll kidnap her and force her to talk me,"_ she thought hopeful. _"She'll have to talk to me,"_ she reassured herself, still hopeful.

"Alice I know what you're planning…Don't," I whispered, too soft for anyone else to hear. Alice turned too me and grinned. _"Sorry Edward,"_ she thought, and then before I could reply she picked up Bella and ran upstairs.

"Alice, what are you doing?" everyone around me yelled as she disappeared from sight. They all turned to me.

"She getting Bella to talk to her," I mumbled, frustrated. I walked over to the chair, next to the couch, and sat down. I didn't speak to anyone I just listened to the conversation going on upstairs, letting the sound of Bella's voice soothe my frustration.

"Ok now let's go back down stairs," Alice said ending the conversation. I sat up in my seat and watched the stairs. I could hear the thumps as Bella walked down the first few stairs, and then she came into view. I stared at her watching every step she took. She didn't look at me even once. When she got down stairs her and Alice walked past me and sat on the free seats.

"Bella," I said, trying to get her attention. It didn't work, she ignored me. I was about to speak again but before I could Bella's phone rang.

"Sorry, I've got to take this. I'll be right back," she explained, glancing at everyone but me. I sighed, frustration and annoyance washing over me. I jumped up from my seat and stormed away. I opened the door to the room that had the piano in it and entered, slamming the door shut behind me. When I got to the piano I sat down and pressed my fingers to the keys. I wasn't playing any song in particular I was just striking the keys, trying to clear my mind. After a while, without conscious recognition, my fingers started to play a familiar melody. It was Bella's lullaby. I closed my eyes, remembering the first time I played this to Bella. She was so happy that day; her smile was bright and carefree. I smiled.

Suddenly I heard the door open. I looked up and saw Bella entering the room. I stared at her, but my fingers continued to press the piano keys. Bella turned to look at me, her chocolate brown eyes burning with an emotion, that I couldn't quite put my finger on. She walked slowly towards me. My eyes followed her the whole way. She stopped and sat down on a chair a few metres form the piano. I longed for her to sit on the bench with me, but I knew that wouldn't happen. I watched as Bella sat on the chair completely silent. She closed her eyes and a small smile played at her lips. In that moment she looked happy and carefree. I wanted to stay and watch her like this forever. But just as this thought came, my fingers stopped moving and the melody ended. Bella opened her eyes and stared into mine.

"Hey," she whispered, her lips turning into a small smile. I inhaled deeply, the tingling sensation coursing through my body, again.

"Hi," I breathed, smiling back. We sat silent for a moment. I continued to stare into her eyes, watching for every flicker of emotion that crossed them.

"So,…uh…I talked to Tanya and she explained… the situation," she said breaking the silence. She pulled her eyes from mine and looked away, a small blush creeping into her cheeks. "I'm …uh…sorry for what I said," she added in a whisper, still not looking at me. My mind wandered back to earlier that day.

"Its fine," I assured. She looked back up at me and her eyes locked onto mine again. I watched as her eyes came alive, she was debating something silently. I groaned internally, frustrated that I couldn't hear what she was thinking. I was about to ask her what it was but before I could her phone rang. _Another interruption, _I growled in my head. Bella pulled her gaze from mine and looked at the phone and then looked back at me. _Don't take it, don't take it,_ I urged silently.

"Uh…I should take this," she mumbled and ran away from me. I groaned out loud in frustration, bringing my hand to the piano and smacking the keys. The sound that it made was horrible and I cringed. I sat at the piano for a while my eyes closed, a hundred different thoughts running through my head. Suddenly someone burst through the door. Concern started to course through me and I felt every muscle in my body tense.

"Edward,…Edward…um I think you should get out here…something's wrong with Bella," Alice shouted so fast that I almost missed what she said. I felt my breathing become faster and I sprinted outside. The sight I saw caused waves of sadness and worry to flow through me simultaneously. Bella was kneeling on the ground her face and eyes blank…she looked like a zombie. Her body was there but her mind was somewhere else. Her phone lay open on the ground.

"What happened?" I asked, turning to my family. They all shrugged in response.

"Bella," I whispered, walking slowly toward her. She didn't look at me or answer me, she just knelt there frozen. I knelt beside her. I stared at her, waiting for her to respond to my presence in some way.

Finally she snapped out of her daze. She lifted her head and looked around wildly, her eyes searching, eventually they rested on me.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I breathed, reaching my hand to comfort her. She flinched away from me, her eyes scared. Pain washed through me. Bella was actually scared of me. I dropped my hand and brought it back to my side. I racked my brains, thinking of what could be wrong; I had never seen her that scared before. Bella spun her head and looked at my family, panic in her eyes.

"Uh…I've got to go," she said, getting up and running towards her car. I knelt there stunned for a moment and then ran after her. I wasn't going to let her go without telling me what was going on. I had too help her, I owed her that much.

"Bella wait, what's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing Edward," she lied. I could hear her voice shaking. She was still turned away from me, but I could tell that she was lying without even looking at her face.

"Bella I know there's something wrong, please tell me maybe I can help," I almost begged. I couldn't get rid of the nagging feeling that it was somehow related to me and if that was the case, I had to help. Bella didn't agree.

"You can't," she replied, her voice cold and harsh. I sighed, closing my eyes. _Why can't you just let me help? _I questioned silently. I felt hurt crash over me.

"Please Bella I want to help," I breathed softly. I opened my eyes and stared at her. I stared at her back, watching as she contemplated telling me. Suddenly she turned around her eyes burning with…fury.

"WHY?" she yelled. "WHY Edward. WHY do you want to help? WHY do you even care?" she asked, scathingly. _Because I care about what happens to you _I answered silently. I was about to say that to her when she interrupted me…again.

"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO LEFT ME,…YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAID THAT YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME,…YOU WERE THE ONE THAT LEFT ME BROKEN…WHY…DO..YOU…CARE," she screamed, tears streaming down her cheeks. In that moment my dead heart came back to life only to be shattered when the pain of what she said struck me. I had left her,…I had told her I didn't love her,… but it was all for her, I did it to keep her from getting hurt. I lied to keep her from getting hurt, but it didn't work. She was hurting worse than ever and it was my fault. She started to turn away from me and I felt desperation surge through me…I had to make her listen,…she had to know that I cared.

"BECAUSE I LIED," I shouted, desperate for her to listen to me. She froze.

"Wh-what," she stuttered.

"I lied Bella," I said quietly due to the shame and guilt I felt. "When I told you I didn't love you, that I didn't want you, I lied". She shook her head.

"St-stop l-l-ying," she stammered. I shook my head, desperate for her to understand.

"I'm not lying, Bella," I urged. "I love you,…I always have and always will. You are my life, my reason for existence…When I left there wasn't a minute that I didn't think about you, there wasn't a minute that you weren't in my heart". I stared into her eyes, using the full force to convince her to believe me. I needed her to believe me. She didn't say anything; she just stood there staring at me. I desired to walk over and dry the tears that fell slowly down her cheeks. I wanted to take her in my arms and never let go. I walked towards her my arm raised. She took a step back and I dropped my hand, another wave of hurt and guilt trickling through me.

"Bella," I sighed. "I know I hurt you and I am sincerely sorry for that, but I am here now and I can help,…I'm here for you," I added assuring her that I was there and that I would never leave again. I was wrong to leave in the first place and I had to make it up to her.

"IT'S TOO LATE EDWARD," she screamed. "It's too late for I'm sorry and I am here, it's too late for I love you and I care about you. IT'S TOO LATE". These words hit me, causing my heart to shatter even further. _Was I really too late? Was the damage I caused ingrained too deep? I would always love Bella, but could she ever love me again._ I felt every part of me breaking away…falling apart. I could not live without Bella, I had tried and it didn't work…she was,…is the very best part of me. In that moment I felt weak, for the very first time in my immortal life, I felt…mortal. Every inch of my body shook from the insurmountable pain that coursed through me.

"Bella please," I begged, my voice hoarse. If I didn't feel my lips moving I wouldn't have recognised my own voice. It sounded so…so human.

"No Edward, I loved you…I still do… and you just left,…you just left, you weren't there. You say you're here for me now…but where were you when it mattered, where were you when I needed you. Where were you when I was lying in the forest, hurt and broken? Where were you when I cried myself to sleep almost every night?" These words hit me with a humongous force. I flinched. It felt like someone stabbed a dagger into my heart. Bella had cried because of me. "Where were you when Laurent came for me in our meadow?" _Wait, what? _I gasped stunned. A growl exited my lips; Laurent had tried to hurt my angel. I had left to keep Bella away from the danger of my world, but that was all in vain. I had lied to Bella for nothing. Sorrow started to flow through me, causing my face to crease from the pain of this realization. I looked at Bella, fresh tears were falling from her eyes.

"Where were you when I found out that Jake was a werewolf? Where were you when I learned that vampires weren't the only mythical creature that existed? Where were you when,…when I found out that Victoria wanted to kill me?" A snarl racked through my body as soon as she spoke _her_ name. Not only had Laurent come after Bella, but Victoria had too. That's where she had gone when I lost her. She went back to Forks, to get Bella. My insides turned, Bella almost got killed because I left. I stepped hesitantly toward her as she spoke again

"And finally where were you…wh-wh-when…she…," Bella whispered, stopping before she finished. Her whole body shook fiercely which caused me to, without thinking, close the rest of the distance between us. We were now just inches from each other. Desperation dripped through me again…_what had Victoria done?_

"When she what, Bella?" I asked, urging her to continue. Pain was dripping in my voice but at that moment, I didn't care about concealing it. The only thing that mattered was Bella.

"Wh-When she came after me…and k-killed…Angela and Ben," she breathed. Bella crumpled, falling onto her knees. Another stab of pain struck my heart. I hated seeing Bella go through this type of pain. I wished that I could steal it all away so she wouldn't have to feel it. I wished I could go back to four years ago so I could shelter her from what she was feeling. I knelt down next to her and looked at her face. It was blank again, she wasn't with us at that moment.

"Bella," I said trying to pull her from her own mind. She didn't respond. I knelt there watching her intently. She seemed ok, until all of a sudden her face became scared and panicked. She started shaking her head muttering incoherently. I listened carefully, trying decipher what was going on, but couldn't. The only words I could make out were _"No"_ and _"Please"._

"What Bella? What's wrong?" I asked quietly, searching her face for the answer. I knew she couldn't hear me but…I had to try. Tears were still falling slowly down her cheeks. _Please Bella, what is it? _I questioned silently this time. Almost in response to my unasked question, she spoke.

"It's all, my fault," she whispered and began crying hysterically. Her body began shaking from the heaving sobs that were leaving her body. I placed my hands on her shoulders to stop the shaking. This seemed to calm her down slightly, her body relaxed a little and the tears became softer.

"Bella, what's your fault,…what happened?" I questioned, trying to pry her form the memory she was reliving. It worked, she opened her eyes and stared into mine.

"It's my fault Ben and Angela died," she whispered. I became slightly confused. _How could it be her fault? What had happened?_ My dead heart began to throb, for what felt like the millionth time today. Seeing Bella this hurt, this broken, this weak caused a pain that I never imagined I could feel.

"Why, Bella? Why is it your fault?" I asked, my voice cracking because of the sadness I felt. I stared intently at her face.

"Because…I told Jake and Charlie to go to Harry's funeral. I told them I wouldn't need guarding because we hadn't seen anything from Victoria for ages. I was the one who invited Ben and Angela over to my house. I was the one who put them in danger," she answered. Pain racked through me again.

"What happened, Bella?" I asked.

"Victoria snuck into the house, she was waiting for us. I made Ben and Angela run and I begged her to leave them alone and take me but she wouldn't,…she wanted to kill them first. She said she would get to me later. I tried to stop her but,…but she was too strong. She threw me away…and then she,…and then she snapped their necks. She killed them…and it's all, my fault," she cried. An unimaginable pain washed through my body. If I could, I was sure that I would've been crying along with Bella. I should've been there for her but I wasn't. I should've shielded her from this type of pain and guilt but I didn't. The truth was it wasn't her fault…it was mine.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry," I sighed, touching my finger lightly to her cheek and wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry that you had to go through that and I'm sorry I wasn't there". I cupped my hand around her cheek and stared into her eyes, trying to steal her pain away. Her warm cheek sent shocks up my arm. Suddenly the proximity got to me and I felt a deep desire to kiss her.

"Bella, I love you," I whispered, giving into the desire. I stared at her face, taking in her response. Her face became soft and her breathing became faster. Her eyes stared into mine, they seemed to surrender…almost, her gaze softened. So without really thinking it through I tilted my head and slowly leaned into Bella. Just as our lips were about to touch, she pulled away.

"No Edward, you can't just say I love you and expect everything to be ok. You can't just touch me…or kiss me and expect it to be alright. IT'S NOT ALRIGHT," she yelled. I scolded myself for being so stupid.

"Bella I'm sorry."

"STOP SAYING I'M SORRRY. IT'S TOO LATE,…IT DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING," she screamed, jumping to her feet and taking a few paces back. _Great, Edward scare her off again,_ I scolded. I felt my face fall.

"Bella," I breathed, jumping to my feet. I took a step toward her with my arm outstretched. I wanted to comfort her again and take away all the pain. Bella stared at me and then looked around at my family. Her face became panicked and she looked scared again. _Why? _I questioned silently, _what is wrong?_

"I'm sorry Edward," she said taking a few steps away from me. "I can't do this right now…I've got to go," she said and turned fiercely running toward her car. She jumped in and accelerated. I stood, frozen, for a few minutes trying to figure out what was wrong with Bella, when I was interrupted. "_Edward, what the hell are you doing?" _my family yelled at me in their thoughts._ "She can't drive home like that, go after her," _they urged. I nodded at them and then ran after Bella.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter, I hope u liked it. O n I've got gwd news I've almost finished the next chapter so it should be up later today or tonite, depending on the reviews I get.**

**Pls, pls review.**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Ok guys, here is the next chapter. I know it's a bit later than I said but I had some trouble.**

**Thanx so much for the reviews. Keep them coming they are awesome. **

**This chapter is a bit short but I promise the next chapter will be longer.**

**Anyway read, I hope u like it. ******

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

When I was about one kilometre away from the Cullens house the tears began to fall harder, blurring my vision. I decided that it wasn't a good idea to drive in that condition so I pulled over to the side of the road. I banged my head against the steering wheel and succumbed to the pain, guilt and panic that coursed through me. My body heaved with the sobs that were escaping. I tried slowing down my breathing to calm myself, but it didn't work…I was too far gone. Images of red hair and pale skin started to flash across my mind. I could hear her maniacal laugh taunting me and the sound of necks breaking as she ended Ben and Angela's lives. I began crying even harder. The louder I cried the louder the laughing would get,…it was like she was there in my car pointing and laughing at me, mocking me. Then suddenly everything went quiet, the only thing I could hear was my own sobs…and then it started.

Ben and Angela appeared in my head. They both stared at me, their eyes cold and accusing. _Why did you let this happen to us Bella?_ they asked in unison. _Why didn't you warn us? Why didn't you help us?_

"I…I…tried," I stuttered answering the voices in my head. My body was still heaving from the sobs that passed through me. _Not hard enough Bella. Did you want us to die? _they questioned, accusingly. My crying became hysterical.

"N-n-no," I cried. _Well then why Bella? Why didn't you help? It's all, your fault, _Ben and Angela screamed simultaneously.

"I-I'm s-so s-sorry," I sobbed. I muttered it over and over again, until eventually the voices disappeared. Unfortunately they were replaced by the one thing worse…the cold, blood red eyes of Victoria. Panic started to well up in me again and I could no longer breathe. Suddenly I felt a cold hand on my shoulder. I screamed in shock and pulled away, trying to get to the passenger seat. Then I heard it…the voice of an angel.

"Bella, love. It's me," he breathed softly. I turned my head and the eyes that met mine were not red, they were the most beautiful shade of gold. I relaxed under his touch, but the tears continued to fall. For once I didn't shy away from his touch and it,…it felt right. I yearned for more. I couldn't hold a grudge anymore, it hurt too much. I needed Edward.

"E-E-Edward," I cried staring into his eyes, pleading with them. "I…I," I stammered. Edward stared back into my eyes and he must have seen something there because he did exactly as I wished. Edward wrapped both his arms around me and pulled me against his chest.

"Shhh, Bella," he whispered, bringing his lips to my ear.

He lifted me from the seat and slid into the car resting me in his lap. He rocked me slowly from side to side. I buried my head in his chest and wept, letting all the pain and guilt escape. Edward stroked my hair with his hand and whispered softly in my ear. Occasionally his lips would leave my ear to kiss my head softly. I didn't object because for the first time in years I felt…safe, like nothing could hurt me. Nothing could hurt me whilst I was wrapped in Edwards arms.

I cried for what felt like a century into Edwards shoulder. I glanced out the window and it was dark…I had been crying for a while. Slowly my breathing returned to normal and the tears slowed. My eyes started to droop and every part of my body was tired. I resisted the black that started to wash through me. I needed to say something to Edward.

"Edward," I muttered my throat hoarse form the crying.

"Mhm," he murmured his lips against my head.

"I…I missed you," I mumbled, slowly giving into the darkness.

"I missed you too, Bella," he breathed into my ear. The last thing I remember was the feel of something cold on my forehead and then…everything was black.

*~*~*

When I awoke from the darkness I was no longer in the car or in Edward's arms, I was in a bed. I lifted my head and looked around the room, recognising it immediately as my own. As memories came surging back I could feel panic begin to build up in me. Where were Jake, Charlie and Seth? I jumped out of bed and sprinted from my room.

"Jake," I called, my voice hoarse because of all the crying. "Charlie,…Seth". Nobody answered and tears began to fall down my cheeks. I fell to the ground, becoming worried about my loved ones. Where were they?

"Bella," Seth called. I spun around and saw Seth standing in the doorway of the bathroom. I jumped up and sprinted towards him, relief washing through me.

"Thank god, you're ok," I whispered, but then something hit me, where were Charlie and Jake. "Wait Seth,…where are Charlie and Jake?" I asked pulling away from him and looking into his face.

"Oh yeah…they had to go do something. They were going to wait till you got up but it got too late and they needed to go. So I am here looking after you and Paul, Embry and Jared are outside in the bushes patrolling just in case," he answered, putting a hand on my shoulder for reassurance.

"Oh ok," I nodded. The force of what was happening crashed into me again. I was being chased after by a vengeful, blood thirsty vampire who would do anything and hurt anyone to get to me. I walked to the couch and sat down, staring into space. Tears began to trickle down my cheeks. I would most likely die and if I didn't…someone close to me would. I couldn't fight it…I couldn't fight her. Images started flashing across my mind and what I saw scared me. I watched as the faces of the people I cared most about, lay dead on the ground. The light was gone from there eyes, they were motionless, just like Ben and Angela were. First was Charlie…then Jake, Seth, the pack…Renee and Phil…then Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Esme, Carlisle and… Edward. The tears fell harder and my body shook. What could I do? Seth came and sat down next to me.

"Bells…Bella what's wrong?" he asked his voice worried. He touched his hand to my shoulder trying to calm me. It didn't work, there was only one person that I needed. I turned my head and looked at Seth. I opened my mouth to try and speak but nothing would come out.

"Bella," Seth asked more worried. I didn't respond,…I couldn't, my mouth wouldn't let me. My body started shaking more violently. Seth placed a blanket around my shoulders and then got up and left. I heard him pressing the buttons of the phone and then heard him murmuring softly. I couldn't hear what he was saying due to the sobs that were escaping my body. I fought hard to stop and for a moment the tears ceased and everything was silent. I heard Seth yell and I jumped.

"Jake you know it's the only thing that will help!" he yelled. I didn't hear anything after that because sobs started to course through my body again.

Seth came in a while later and knelt down in front of me. He stared into my face and wiped his hand across my cheek, getting rid of all the tears, but just as he did new tears replaced them. Seth lifted me and gently placed me on the couch lying down. My head fell onto a soft pillow, which I assumed he had put there. Finally he got the blanket and placed it on top of me. He then knelt in front of me again.

"Bella," he whispered gently, I didn't look at him. I buried my head into the pillow. "I have to go do something, but Embry will be here if you need anything, ok". I didn't answer him I just continued to sob into the pillow. Seth placed a hand on the back of me head. "Don't worry Bella…everything will be ok soon," he whispered and then walked away.

I continued crying into the pillow, for I don't know how long, it felt like an eternity. Eventually though my eyes began to droop from exhaustion. The tears stopped and I drifted into unconsciousness…again.

*~*~*

"_Bella," somebody hissed, sending a shiver down my spine. I turned slowly and was greeted by blood-red slits that burned into me. She smiled at me, sending another shiver down my spine. I turned on my heel, preparing to run away but froze when I saw four figures standing in front of me. It was Ben, Angela, Charlie and Renee…but there was something different about them. A solitary tear slid down my cheek when I realised what it was. They all had crimson eyes._

"_No," I gasped, reaching a hand up to mouth. I turned to Victoria anger, sadness and guilt pulsing through me. I was about to run when seven figures came and stood beside her, it was the Cullens. I stared at them and they stared back, their blood red eyes cold and hard. I looked between all of them, my eyes finally resting on Edward. His eyes burned in to me. _

"_No," I whispered, falling to the ground. _

"_Bella," Edward snarled. His voice was no longer like velvet, it was harsh and cold,…all traces of kindness and love gone. I looked up at him and noticed that he was walking towards me, along with everyone else. I screamed and jumped up…._

Abruptly, I woke up, a blood curdling scream coming from my lips. I turned fiercely not remembering where I was. When I did remember it was too late I and rolled off the couch. I closed my eyes, preparing for the pain that would come when I crashed to the ground but it never happened. Two ice cold arms wrapped around me before I reached the floor and lifted me slowly back onto the couch. My breath caught in the back of my throat and I slowly turned to see who it was.

*~*~*

**Ok so that was the chapter. Yay, finally some Edward and Bella interaction without yelling. **

**Who do you think it was at the end? I'd love to hear your guesses**

**I hope u enjoyed it.**

**Neway pls review.**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Omg guys I am so, so, so, so sorry for taking so long to update. I was sick and then my computer died and well it was really annoying. Neway I promise I will never take that long again.**

**I'll stop blabbering so u guys can read. I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

As I ran, Bella's face crossed my mind over and over. She looked so hurt…so broken. When I left I thought I was keeping her from getting hurt, but it turned out that I hurt her more than I could possibly imagine…I broke her. I wasn't there for her and it broke her. As this thought popped into my head, my body throbbed in pain. I had broken Bella. I shook my head to clear the images and then focused all my attention on the road ahead. I began running faster when I saw a parked car about four hundred metres up the road. My dead heart began to thump against my chest as I got closer to the car.

When I got to the car my heart spluttered to a stop. It was replaced by an ache. Bella had her head against the steering wheel, and was sobbing hysterically. My face crumpled in pain; it was my fault that Bella was like that.

"I-I'm s-so s-sorry," she sobbed. She muttered it over and over again. I had to stop it; I couldn't stand seeing Bella like that. It was heartbreaking. I slowly opened the door and knelt down beside her. She didn't seem to notice my arrival. I stared at her, contemplating what to do. I didn't want to scare her. Suddenly she stopped muttering. She relaxed momentarily, but then became scared and panicked. Her breathing stopped and I became worried. Without really thinking I touched my hand to her shoulder. She screamed and pulled away from me, scrambling for the passenger seat. I scolded myself for being so stupid. Of course my cold touch would shock her.

"Bella, love. It's me," I breathed, hoping to calm her. It seemed to work, she stopped struggling and slowly turned her head. Her swollen eyes met mine and every ounce of pain that she felt washed through me. Her body relaxed as she leaned into me. Tears poured from her eyes, staining her cheeks. She stared at me through the tears, her eyes pleading, trying to convey some silent message.

"E-E-Edward," she cried, her eyes burning with a new intensity. "I…I," she stammered before letting out another hysterical sob. My heart started to ache again. I couldn't stand there and do nothing whilst Bella was hurting. I wrapped both my arms around her and pulled her against my chest.

"Shhh, Bella," I whispered softly in her ear. I lifted her from the seat and slid into the car, resting her on my lap. I rocked her slowly from side to side. She buried her head in my chest and wept. My body shook as each sob left her body. I removed one of my arms from her waist and began stroking her hair whispering softly in her ear, reassuring and comforting her. She cried letting out all her pain.

I let out a tearless sob, as I held her. Seeing her like that caused an insurmountable amount of pain to course through me. Bella wasn't just broken…she was shattered. She was shattered into a thousand tiny pieces and I only hoped that I wasn't too late to put her back together. I removed my lips from her ear and touched them softly to her head.

I lost all perception of time as I sat there just holding Bella. Time didn't matter, the only thing that mattered was Bella. I would hold her forever, if that was what she needed. Slowly Bella's tears began to stop and her body slumped, becoming tired. I rested my lips softly on her head.

"Edward" she muttered groggily, her voice croaky from the crying.

"Mhm," I murmured in reply.

"I…I missed you," she mumbled. This sent a jolt through my body; Bella had missed me as well. I glanced down at her and noticed that her eyes were drooping. She was trying hard to fight it but the fatigue was taking over her. I moved my lips to her ear.

"I missed you too, Bella," I breathed. I looked at her face again and saw that she had now closed her eyes, a small smile on her face. I pressed my lips softly to her forehead.

I watched Bella's face as she slept; it looked peaceful yet pained in a way. Even in sleep you could see the hurt that she suffered…the hurt that I caused. In that moment I promised myself that I would never let Bella see that type of pain again. I promised myself that I would hold onto Bella forever and protect her from the world. There was one problem with that though…I had to drive Bella home and I couldn't do that without letting go of her. I began to think of solutions to the problem when I heard a light tap on the window. I turned my head to look at the pixie-like face of my favourite sister, Alice, looking in at me. She opened the car door silently and then smiled down at Bella.

"Alice, what are you doing?" I whispered. She shook her head.

"What do you think genius," she teased, motioning for me to move to the passenger seat. I smiled at her and obliged, taking special care to not wake Bella. Alice slid into the driver's seat and shut the door softly behind her. She took one last glance at me and Bella and then started the car, accelerating quickly.

"Alice," I whispered. "Slow down, you'll wake Bella". Alice smiled at me and did as I asked. She knew the real reason I didn't want her driving fast. It wasn't because it would wake Bella; it was because I wanted to stay in that moment for as long as I could.

When we got to Bella's house I knew there was trouble. I looked out the windscreen and saw two figures running towards the car. I recognised them instantly, one was Jacob Black and the other was Bella's father, Charlie. I opened the car door slowly and stepped out, making sure that Bella didn't hit her head on the frame. Charlie and Jacob both froze when they saw Bella in my arms.

"What did you do, bloodsucker," Jacob asked, his voice almost a growl. He glared at me, his eyes burning with hatred. I took a deep breath, composing myself. The last thing I wanted was too kill Bella's best friend.

"Nothing," I answered calmly, "she was too exhausted too drive so we drove her home". I kept my voice quiet so I wouldn't wake Bella.

"Ok, well we can take it from here," Jacob hissed, walking toward me. He wanted to take her from me. He wanted to make me break the promise I made myself. I let out a soft growl and he stopped, his body shaking. Alice was at my side then, her hand on my arm. _Calm down Edward, _she screamed in her head. I inhaled deeply, attempting to calm myself.

"Just let me take her inside," I snapped, my voice sharper than I intended. Jacob shook his head. I looked at Charlie whose face was contorted in worry for his daughter. "Please," I added staring at him. Charlie looked at me and nodded.

"Fine, take her inside and then leave," he said, his eyes falling back onto Bella. I nodded and then walked toward the house. When I got to the porch I noticed that there was a group of people glaring at me. I blocked there thoughts from my head, I didn't need to hear their thoughts to know who they were. I could smell who they were, well I could smell what they were. They were the werewolf pack. I walked past them and into the house and toward Bella's room. When I reached her room I placed her softly on the bed. I stared at her for a moment, not wanting to leave. I kissed her softly on the lips and then moved my lips to her ear.

"I love you, Bella," I whispered. I knew she couldn't hear me but I needed to say it. I looked at her face one last time and then, hesitantly, left the room. I didn't want to leave, but I thought that it was best that I did. I didn't want to start a fight with the werewolves when there was something worse happening to Bella. This thought sparked something inside me. There was something happening to Bella and I was sure that the werewolves knew something about it. I sprinted outside and stopped in front of Jacob Black, who was standing in the same spot as when I left.

"What's going on with Bella? Is she danger?" I asked. He just glared at me.

"It's got nothing to do with you bloodsucker," he spat. I growled and stepped toward him.

"If Bella's in danger it's got everything to do with me," I replied sharply. He didn't say anything further. Fortunately he didn't have to speak. I looked into his head and let out a loud growl when I got the answer I wanted.

"Victoria…Victoria is coming for Bella…I thought you killed her," I shouted, taking a step back. His face became angry and he growled at me.

"No," he snarled, "I fought her…but then she ran. I was worried about Bella so I didn't chase her". As he said this, images of Bella lying on the ground, her body broken and bruised, flashed into his head. They were then replaced by images of Bella, lying in a hospital bed, unconscious. I let out a gasp as I saw these, pain washing through me. Seeing Bella so hurt physically was painful.

"I tried finding her after I dropped Bella off at the hospital, but it was too late she was gone," Jacob added. We both stood there silent for a moment, thinking about Bella. It was then that I realised we had at least one thing in common. We were both concerned about Bella.

"Let me stay. Let me help," I said, breaking the silence. I wasn't asking for his permission really. I was going to find and kill Victoria. I just thought that it would be nice if we were on the same side. Apparently Jacob didn't think so. He looked up at me and he became angry again.

"No, we don't need your help. Leave…now," he hissed, taking a step toward me. Anger started dripping through me as the realisation of Jacobs's actions hit me; he was trying to keep me from Bella. I stepped toward him, so we were now just inches from each other. You could almost see the waves of anger and hatred pulsating off the both of us.

"I'm not going anywhere," I snarled, clenching both my fists. Jacob growled softly and his fists clenched as well. His body began shaking violently. I could see every thought that went through his head. He imagined a big russet werewolf ripping me to shreds. I smiled at this thought causing him to become angrier. He was about to speak when he was interrupted by Charlie, who obviously wanted to stop the confrontation.

"Hey Jake," he said grabbing one of Jacobs arms, "how 'bout we go inside and wait for Bella to wake up". He pulled gently on Jacobs arm. Jacob stared at me, considering Charlies suggestion. Reluctantly he turned to Charlie and nodded and they both walked toward the house. I began to follow them but was stopped by Alice, who placed her hands on my arms. I glared down at her.

"Alice, what are you doing?" I snapped angrily.

"Edward, maybe we should just go," she whispered, her eyes pleading. I shook my head and pushed her hands off me.

"No, Alice. I have to stay. I have to look after Bella," I breathed, looking down into my sister's eyes.

"I know Edward, I want to stay and look after her too. But there is no point starting a fight. Anyway we need to tell Carlisle about Victoria. She will be fine for tonight…we'll come back tomorrow when things have cooled down a bit, ok," she reasoned. I knew she was right but I didn't want to admit it. I wanted to be with Bella. Eventually rationality won and I sighed in defeat.

"Fine," I breathed and ran into the forest. I heard Alice running behind me. She didn't speak which I was grateful for, I wasn't in the mood for talking.

When we got to the house Alice and I paused momentarily before entering. Alice then opened the door and we both walked through. All my family were, as I expected, in the lounge. They all looked up when Alice and I entered, there faces expectant. I walked over and sat down on the couch next to Esme, who placed her hand reassuringly on my arm. I closed my eyes and rubbed a hand through my hair, trying to get rid of the nagging feeling that I shouldn't have left Bella. When I opened my eyes my family were all staring at me. I could hear the curiosity in their thoughts but I couldn't tell them anything, my thoughts were still on Bella. I looked at Alice who was sitting next to Japer holding his hand. She nodded and then started talking to the family. I didn't listen to what any of them were saying, I just watched Bella as she passed through my head. I could feel the stares of my family as they watched me, sympathy and concern ingrained in their thoughts. Nobody spoke they just sat watching me, waiting for me to do something. It was like the calm before the storm. Everything and everyone was completely still and quiet. The only sound that filled the room was the slow breathing of my family. I assumed that they were all waiting for me to _"snap"_ and go running after Victoria. As I sat there in silence I felt…anger begin to bubble inside of me. As time progressed this anger turned to rage and, just as my family expected, I snapped. I jumped up from my seat every pore dripping with the fury that coursed through my body. Victoria wouldn't get anywhere near Bella ever again…I would make sure of that.

"I've got to go," I hissed through my teeth. I turned on my heel and sprinted out the door, leaving my family far behind…or so I thought. Of course I was wrong.

"Edward…Edward wait," Jasper called from behind me. I didn't stop, I continued to run. I heard Jasper still running behind me.

"Edward…Bella needs you to stay here," he shouted. At that I stopped running and turned to Jasper, who was now standing in front of me. Jasper didn't offer his opinion on my actions very often so when he did I took notice.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. I didn't have to read his thoughts to find out, he spoke immediately.

"You need to stay. You have to be here for Bella. She can't do it alone, not again. She needs you Edward," he said. I could feel my anger begin to melt away.

"But…Vic….," I muttered before closing my mouth and looking at the ground. Jasper was right I couldn't leave Bella, but I couldn't let Victoria get anywhere near Bella either.

"How about me and Alice go to Forks and look around," he compromised. I nodded gently in response.

"Thanks Jas," I whispered. He patted me on the arm and then walked back to the house. I followed, taking in the surroundings. I looked up at the sky and realised that it was morning.

"Crap," I muttered as Jaspers hand reached for the door. He turned his head to look at me, his face scrunched up in concern. "Work," I said answering his silent questions. A look of understanding crossed his face and he nodded.

"Don't go," he said as he opened the door. I considered that for a moment and then decided that staying home was probably the best course of action. I wouldn't be able to concentrate on work.

When we got inside Jasper went to find Alice so they could leave for Forks as soon as possible. I dawdled upstairs, every inch of my body aching from the pain of last nights events. I collapsed on the couch in my room, my mind and body exhausted. As I lay there I let the pain that I had been denying all night consume me. I relived last night's events over and over again.

*~*~*

Four miserable hours later, I heard a car driving down the driveway that sounded very unfamiliar. As the visitor brought their car to a stop in front of the house, I listened to their thoughts. I let out a gasp when I saw an image of a distraught Bella in their head. I sprinted downstairs and ripped the door open before the visitor could knock. He gave me a small smile before his face crumpled with concern

"Hi, I'm Seth Clearwater…your Dad said I could find you here," he said his voice shaking slightly. I knew this boy, I had seen him last night. He was a werewolf.

"What's wrong with Bella," I said, getting straight to the point. A look of confusion crossed his face and he stared at me, wondering how I knew. "Mind reader," I added pointing to my head. Understanding crossed his face and he nodded.

"Uh…right. Well um…I don't know what's wrong exactly. She just wouldn't stop crying and she wouldn't talk to me. I tried to comfort her but I couldn't…she …uh, I think she needs you," he muttered looking up at me. This sent a flurry of emotion through me. I didn't stay still to see what those feelings were. I wanted to get to Bella. If she was hurting I wanted to be there.

"Ok, I'll see you there," I said sprinting past Seth. I started the car quickly and accelerated as fast as I could up the driveway. Bella's distraught face crossed my mind over and over again, causing guilt to flow through me. I shouldn't have left last night…I should have held her in my arms like I promised myself.

"Idiot," I muttered angrily. My fists clenched tighter around the steering wheel and my foot pushed harder on the accelerator.

About ten minutes later I arrived at Bella's house. I parked the car and jumped out, hurrying toward the door. I ran through the door and into the house. I looked around the house, my eyes searching for Bella. My eyes finally rested on someone sitting on a chair in the lounge room. The person looked up at me, his eyes disapproving. He didn't like me being there, like most of the other werewolves he hated me. He shook his head and then pointed to a couch, before turning his gaze back to his hands. I approached the couch slowly. When I reached it my face fell. Bella was asleep on the couch. Her face still glistened with the tears that fell from her swollen eyes. She looked so vulnerable laying there. All hope and happiness was gone from her face. I wanted to pick her up and hold her but I didn't want to risk waking her. I instead settled on kneeling beside her, placing my hand on her arm. I was about to press my lips to her forehead but remembered that we weren't alone.

"I can take it from here," I whispered my eyes never leaving Bella. The guy, I now know as Embry, grumbled something that I didn't understand and remained in his seat. I turned my head and glared at him. He glared right back. "I said you could go," I added my voice becoming angry. Embry shook his head and turned away. I clenched my fists, in attempt to stop the anger from bursting out. _Jake would kill me if I left you alone with Bella_, Embry thought silently. He clearly didn't know that I could hear his thoughts. I let out a soft snarl and stood up. I was still angry at Jacob for keeping me away from Bella last night. Embry looked at me confused.

"You can tell Jacob that I am not leaving Bella. If he has a problem with that he can come tell me himself. Now as I said I can take it from here," I whispered angrily. Embry sat still for a moment, debating whether it was worth fighting me. He decided that it wasn't and stood up, leaving me and Bella alone. I knelt back down beside Bella, all the anger and annoyance gone. I placed my hand back on her arm and touched my lips lightly to her forehead.

I stayed in that same position for at least an hour, watching every flicker of emotion that crossed Bella's face as she dreamed. All of a sudden Bella let out blood curdling scream and she awoke. Disoriented, she turned fiercely and tumbled towards the ground. Before she could I caught her, wrapping both my arms securely around her waist. I lifted her back onto the couch and sat beside her. She slowly turned, her swollen eyes staring into mine. They seemed to be searching for something. I wasn't sure what exactly but, it seemed, she found it.

"Edward," she whispered barely audible. "I thought…I thought….," she stuttered not able to finish her sentence. She wasn't crying but she was obviously scared about something. Her breathing became quick and I was afraid she was going to hyperventilate. Instinctively, I pulled her towards me, wrapping both arms around her.

"It's alright Bella I'm here now," I whispered softly. I rubbed circles in her back, trying to soothe her. It worked. Slowly Bella's breathing returned to normal. She buried her head into my chest.

"Edward, I'm so scared," she mumbled against my chest. I pulled her face up by her chin so I could look into her eyes.

"Bella," I whispered, staring into her eyes. "I promise I will not let anything or anyone hurt you." I touched my hand to her cheek. She closed her eyes.

"I'm not worried about myself," she muttered quietly. This confused me, if she wasn't scared for herself, who was she scared for?

"I don't understand," I said confusion in my face. She opened her eyes and stared into them for a moment before pulling away from me. This sent hurt through me, did she not want me there anymore.

"I have to go have shower," she said. She began to walk away but hesitated. I stared at her. She turned to me her face worried. "Uh…um, Edward will you be here when I get out?" she asked. The fact that she had to ask that question hurt me.

"Definitely," I assured her, a small smile on my face. She nodded and smiled also but there was something off in her face. She looked almost…hesitant, like she didn't believe me. My body throbbed in pain yet again. I hated that I had caused Bella to doubt me. When she closed the door to the bathroom, the front door opened and Jacob Black entered.

"Great," I sighed. I had been so preoccupied with Bella that I hadn't even heard him arrive. He glared at me when he noticed my presence but he didn't say anything. He was concerned about Bella and, as much as he hated to admit it, he knew that I could help. He wasn't going to ask me to leave this time. I smiled. Jacob rolled his eyes and then walked toward me.

"Ok, you can stay here on one condition," I nodded. "You," he said pointing at me, "stay out of my head". I laughed and nodded. I swear I almost saw a smile on his face as he turned and walked away. As Jacob walked away Bella's dad, Charlie, walked in and sat on the chair beside the couch. When he was seated, he closed his eyes and rubbed both of his temples. He looked so worn and tired, like the weight of world was bearing down on him. I guess in a way it was.

"Uh…Chief Swan," I said, nervously. It was like I was a teenager meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. "Are you ok? Can I get you something?" I asked, staring at Charlie. He opened his eyes and looked at me.

"No I'm fine," he answered. I could tell from the way that he looked at me that he was still worried about letting me back into Bella's life. He didn't trust me, he was sure I was going to break his daughter's heart again. We both sat silent for a second before Charlie spoke.

"Edward can I ask you question?" he asked, his tired eyes piercing into me. This frightened me, I was afraid that he was going to tell me to leave Bella. I nodded in response.

"Why did you leave in the first place?" he questioned, "I always thought it was because…well…because you didn't love her anymore. Looking at you now I can see that's not true so…why?" My whole body tensed. At the time I left because I thought it would keep Bella safe, that it would keep her from getting hurt. It turns out that leaving was the worst mistake that I ever made. By leaving, I put her in more danger. How was I supposed to tell Bella's father that I left to keep her safe…when, clearly, I failed horribly. I racked my brains for an alternative answer, one that didn't sound…well weak. I didn't find one. Charlie's eyes bore into me, examining every inch of my face, searching for the answer. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, deciding the truth was the only real option.

"Well," I started, my voice shaking. "At the time I thought it was for the best. My world was no place for Bella. I didn't want her getting hurt because of _what_ I am. I wanted her to have a chance at a normal life. I left because I wanted to keep her safe…I didn't want her to get hurt," I added looking at the ground, feeling ashamed. "I can see now that it was a huge mistake but, at the time, I thought it was for the best." I looked back up at Charlie who was nodding gently, trying to understand what I just said. We both sat silent for a moment, thinking about Bella. Eventually Charlie broke it.

"Well, I've got to go talk to Jake," he said, standing up and walking away. He paused momentarily and I turned to look at him. "Edward, you're not leaving again right? I don't think Bella would be able to live through that a second time," he added. I felt my face fall again.

"No, I'm here as long as Bella wants me," I assured him, sadness dripping in every syllable. The thought that I caused Bella so much pain still hurt. Charlie nodded and then exited the house leaving me alone, pain burning through my body. I decided that I would wait for Bella in her room, so I could endure the pain privately. I walked slowly to Bella's room and collapsed on her bed. As I lay there I remembered all the other times that I waited for Bella as she showered. It was then that I vowed that I would do anything to make things right with Bella again. I had to have her back in my life.

*~*~*

**Ok so that was the chapter. I hope u liked it.**

**Pls, pls review.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Hey guys sorry this took a bit longer than expected. At least it wasn't as long as last time. **

**Thanks so much to all the people that left reviews. They were awesome. They make me so happy. They seriously make my day. You are all my heroes.**

**Anyway here is the next chapter. I hope you like it**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

Two ice cold arms wrapped around me before I reached the floor and lifted me slowly back onto the couch. My breath caught in the back of my throat and I slowly turned to see who it was. It was Edward. I stared into his eyes, almost expecting them to be crimson red like in my dream. I searched for any hint that my dream may have been real life. It wasn't. The eyes staring back at me weren't the cold blood red eyes of a killer. They were the golden eyes of an angel.

"Edward," I whispered so softly that I was surprised he heard me. "I thought…, I thought," I stuttered, trying to voice what I had seen but couldn't. Victoria was going to hurt everyone to get to me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. At this thought my breathing became quick. Panic started to build and I was on the point of hysteria. I couldn't let everyone I care about die because of me. Almost as if he knew what was going on in my mind, Edward wrapped his arms around me and crushed me to his chest.

"It's alright Bella I'm here now," he whispered. He rubbed circles in my back, attempting to soothe me. It sort of worked. My breathing slowly returned to normal but my mind was still running at a million miles an hour, watching as everyone I cared about stared at me with cold, blood red eyes. I buried my head into Edward's chest trying to stop the images from forming.

"Edward, I'm so scared," I mumbled. He tightened his grip, pulling me closer to him. He brought his hand to my chin and lifted it so I was staring into his eyes.

"Bella," he whispered, his eyes burning into mine. "I promise I will not let anything or anyone hurt you," he added bringing his hand to my cheek. He had misunderstood me. He thought I was sacred for myself when in reality I was scared for everyone but. I leaned into his touch and closed my eyes. Without thinking I corrected him.

"I'm not worried about myself," I muttered. Almost instantly I regretted what I had said. I didn't want Edward to get involved in this whole situation. I didn't want him getting hurt because of me. His muscles tensed and I could feel the confusion and concern dripping off him.

"I don't understand," he said. I opened my eyes and stared into his for a moment before pulling away from his grasp.

"I have to go have a shower," I lied, standing up. The truth was that I had to get away before he convinced me to tell him everything. I walked away but then stopped. Something hit me and I became worried. _Would Edward be here when I got out?_

"Uh…um, Edward will you be here when I get out?" I asked trying to keep my voice emotionless. He looked at me and hurt flashed across his face.

"Definitely," he assured a small smile on his face. Doubt washed over me. _How could I be sure he would stay?_ I nodded and forced my lips into a small smile. I knew my face looked off but I hoped that Edward didn't notice. I looked at him for a moment longer and then turned, walking slowly to the bathroom. I closed the door softly behind me.

I removed my clothes and dumped them on the floor before stepping into the shower. I turned on the tap and let the water glide over me. Every muscle in my body relaxed instantly. It was then that I realised just how exhausted I was. It felt like I had run a marathon. Suddenly images started popping into my head causing every inch of my body to tense. It was the same images I had been seeing all morning, my loved lying on the floor, their bodies lifeless. Then it changed. They were standing, their blood red eyes burning into me. I felt panic rise in me again. I placed my hands on the shower wall and leaned all my weight against it. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply attempting to calm myself. _It won't happen; it's just your imagination, _I told myself over and over and it worked. The panic slowly dissipated. The truth was that no one else would get hurt because I wouldn't let them. I wouldn't let anyone else get hurt because of me. _It will be different this time_, I assured myself.

When I was sure that all traces of the panic I felt were gone I stepped out of the shower. I wrapped the towel around me and walked to rack where I thought I had put my clothes. When I got to the rack I groaned.

"Crap," I muttered, annoyed. I had forgotten to bring a change of clothes and I wasn't going to put on yesterdays dirty clothes. I secured the towel tightly around me, making sure I was covered, and opened the door. I prepared myself for the short sprint to my room. I didn't want Edward to see me in just a towel, it was embarrassing. I glanced over to the couch to make sure that he wasn't watching and let out a small sigh, sadness washing through me. Edward wasn't there. I bit my lip fighting the tears that threatened to spill. _Stupid Bella, of course he wouldn't stay, _my head screamed. I walked over to the couch and looked around, hoping that if I looked long enough he would suddenly appear. He didn't. I dawdled back to my room, feeling deflated. I closed the door softly behind me and walked over to my closet. I heard a soft cough behind me and I turned abruptly, forgetting that I only had a towel on. A huge grin spread across my face. It was Edward.

"Edward," I said, my smile so big it hurt my face. Edward smiled back, his eyes running up and down my figure. It was at that moment that I looked down and realised I was still in a towel. I turned around so my back was to him, my face turning a deep shade of red.

"Umm," I said searching for something to say. "I…uh…umm," I stuttered. By this time I was bright red, my cheeks were burning. Edward laughed and then left. I stood frozen for a moment the humiliation and embarrassment taking over me.

When it had passed I got dressed in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I let out a deep breath and then opened the door walking toward the lounge room, where Edward was sitting on the couch. I felt a blush begin to creep into my cheeks. I sat down on the opposite side of the couch and kept my eyes on the floor. From the corner of my eye I could see that Edward was fighting hard to not laugh.

"I thought you had gone," I muttered, explaining what happened. I saw Edward stiffen beside me and he let out a big gust of air. All humour seemed to leave the room.

"Bella," he sighed. "I said I wouldn't," he added, his voice hurt. I didn't look at him; part of me still doubted him. "Will you look at me?" he asked. As much as I wanted to do just that I couldn't, I didn't want him to see the doubt in my face. He let out another sigh and moved to sit beside me. He placed his hand under my chin and gently lifted my face so I was looking into his.

"Bella, I love you," he whispered, his golden eyes burning with such intensity that it was hard not to believe him. I stared back into his eyes. They were desperate; they silently begged me to believe him and I did. I now knew that Edward did love me. There was just one thing I was worried about….

"I'm not going anywhere," he added. That was what I wasn't so sure about. How was I supposed know if he was telling the truth. I turned my head away from him. Edward seemed to see the scepticism…the hesitance…the doubt in my face. He placed his hands on my cheeks and turned my face so I was looking at him once again. He stared at me momentarily and then slowly moved his face toward mine. He was going to kiss me.

"Edward…, please don't," I pleaded. A solitary tear trickled down my cheek. He stopped.

"Why?" he asked, hurt.

"Because if you do it will make it that much harder if…, when you leave," I admitted. He closed his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Bella," he groaned slightly frustrated. "I promise I will never leave you again. You are my life. I love you. Please believe me," he begged, his voice cracking. I stared at his face and saw the honesty and sincerity behind his words. He wasn't lying…he was going to stay with me.

"I believe you," I whispered, nodding my head. His mouth turned into my favourite crooked smile and he leaned forward, crushing his lips against mine. My breathing became laboured and my heart began beating frantically. I had forgotten how much I missed kissing Edward. I smiled against his lips as I brought my hands to his hair. Edward placed his hands on my hips and pulled me closer to him. I wanted to stay in that moment forever. Unfortunately, all too soon, Edward pulled away leaving us both gasping for air. It was going too far.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, feeling ashamed for letting myself get so carried away. Edward smiled.

"Don't be," he whispered. He then kissed me on the forehead and pulled me against his chest. I tilted my head so I could look into his face.

"Edward…I love you," I smiled. He looked down at me.

"I love you too," he said, bringing his lips down and touching them gently to mine. I smiled and buried my face in his chest feeling happy for the first time in ages.

*~*~*

Edward and I sat on the couch for hours; I'm not sure how many exactly. I was too pre occupied by Edward. We weren't talking; we just sat silently enjoying each others company. Edward eventually spoke.

"Bella, it's late. You should probably get some rest," he said. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was midnight. It wasn't until then that I realised just how tired I was.

"I'm not tired," I lied. He saw right through this.

"Bella," he almost growled, "You need to sleep". I looked at his face and could see that I wasn't going to win this fight. My argument wasn't helped by me yawning. He looked at me with that look and I knew I had lost.

"Fine," I sighed, defeated and began to get off the couch. Before I could Edward picked me up and began carrying me to my room. This caused me to become annoyed.

"Edward, I am perfectly capable of walking. Put me down." Edward smiled at me and then obliged, dropping me on my bed. He let out a small chuckle which caused my annoyance to increase. I glared at him and stomped off to the bathroom to get changed into my pyjamas. When I got back Edward was laying on my bed grinning at me. I glared at him and got in on the other side of the queen size bed. I pulled the covers over me and turned so my back was to him. I felt him move closer to me.

"You know, you're not supposed to go to sleep angry," he breathed in my ear.

"I'm not angry," I replied sharply, "I'm annoyed. First you carry me and then you laugh at me." He stayed silent for a moment.

"I'm sorry," he breathed, "I just forgot how cute you look when you're annoyed. I missed it." He began stroking my hair and I felt my heart flutter. I couldn't resist any longer. I sighed and turned to him. He put his arm around me and I snuggled against his chest.

"Four years and you can still do it," I muttered more to myself than Edward.

"Do what?' he asked looking down at me.

"Dazzle me," I admitted. He smiled my favourite smile and I almost forgot to breathe.

"Do I really?" he asked. I nodded and he leaned down and touched his lips to my forehead. He then moved them to my ear. "Good…because you still amaze me," he breathed. I smiled against his chest.

"This has to be a dream," I mumbled, unable to believe what was happening. Edward cupped his hand on my cheek.

"It's not a dream Bella," he whispered tilting his head toward me. He crashed his lips into mine and my heart raced yet again. He pulled away leaving me gasping. He smiled and then put his head against my chest, where my heart was trying escape

"I missed this," he said. For some reason his closeness caused me to blush. He lifted his head from my chest and smiled. "Oh and this," he added stroking his hand against my cheek. This caused me to blush even more. He chuckled softly and then returned to his original position with his arm around me. We both sat silently.

Whilst we sat there silently a million questions started running through my head. It felt like I was going to explode if I didn't ask him.

"Edward," I said breaking the silence. "Why did you leave? You said you lied…what was the real reason?" I asked. I felt Edward stiffen beside me and I moved into a sitting position so I could look into his face. He closed his eyes.

"I was hoping you wouldn't ask me that," he breathed opening his eyes to look into mine. A whole array of emotions crossed through them. Sadness, pain, hurt, shame…guilt. He turned his face away and remained silent. I put one hand on his cheek and turned his face back to me.

"Please tell me," I pleaded.

"Ok," he said nodding gently. "Just let me explain everything before you say anything, ok. No interruptions." I nodded and placed my hands in his.

"Well," he started, seeming nervous. His voice shook. "At the time I thought it was for the best. It seemed that you kept getting hurt because of me…first James then Jasper. My presence kept putting you in danger. You kept getting hurt because of what I am. I wanted you to have a chance at a normal life and I knew that if you were with me you couldn't. I left to keep you safe," he said looking into my eyes. I felt a hint of anger begin to rise in me. _Shouldn't I get a say in my safety_, I thought angrily. I was about to open my mouth and argue but Edward stopped me. "Let me finish before you say anything," he begged, his voice cracking in pain. I closed my mouth and he continued.

"I didn't want you to get hurt, I wanted to protect you. I can see now it was a huge mistake but, at the time, I thought it was for the best. I thought it was the only way to keep you safe," he added. I looked away trying to comprehend what he just said. _He left to protect me from getting hurt? All the pain and hurt was because he had a stupid misconception in his head. He thought that he put me in danger._ If he had of told me this four years ago I might've understood…but not now. Anger started to drip through me.

"And you thought I shouldn't have gotten a say in _my _safety. That I shouldn't have gotten a say in my life," I snapped. Edward sighed. "It didn't work Edward. I'm not safe and I am in pain. If you had of just spoken to me instead of ignoring me it would've saved me…, us a lot of heartbreak," I said my voice cold. Angry tears started falling.

"I know Bella," he said his voice deep, pained. It didn't sound like Edward's voice. "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have left. If I could go back I would, but I can't." I interrupted him before he could continue. A question had been in the back of my mind for…, well four years really

"Why didn't you come back for me?" I asked. His face fell.

"I wanted to Bella believe me. But I couldn't, I couldn't put you in danger. I love you too much. You have to understand that there wasn't a day where I didn't think about you. I know I wasn't there when…, when it mattered but I'm here now." This comment got me thinking. _Would he be here if I didn't run into him at the hospital? _I pulled my hands from his.

"Edward the only reason you are here now is because you ran into me at the hospital. Can you honestly say that if you knew I was working there you would've taken the job? If you didn't accidently run into me at the hospital would you be here?" I questioned. He looked down at his hands, but didn't speak. He didn't answer. He couldn't.

"That's what I thought," I whispered trying to fight the tears. He tried to grab my hands but I snatched them away. I moved as far from him as the bed would allow and got back under the covers my head resting on the pillow. I let the tears fall now. My body shook. Edward sat silent but didn't move. I could hear his deep breathing.

I'm not sure how long I cried for but the whole time Edward sat there silently, not moving. A small whimper escaped my lips and it seemed that Edward couldn't handle just sitting there anymore.

"Bella," he breathed so softly and gently that it almost broke my heart. I didn't answer him though, I couldn't.

"Bella talk to me. Tell me what's going on in your head," he pleaded. I ignored him still.

"Bella please, I love you. Talk to me," he begged his voice deep. It sounded like he was going to cry. I didn't answer. He sighed and muttered something to soft for me to hear. He was silent for a moment and then spoke.

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked, sadness and pain in his voice. My body stiffened. I didn't want him to leave. No matter how upset with him I was I still needed him. It was then that I realised, _it didn't matter why Edward left or why he was back. It only mattered that he was here now._ I wiped my hand across my cheeks drying all my tears and then turned to him. He was staring down at me, his eyes so sad, so hurt that it caused me physical pain to see them like that.

"No. I don't ever want you to leave," I croaked, my throat hoarse from the crying. I rolled over to him and snuggled against his chest. He wrapped his arm around me again.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I hate that I caused you so much pain," he breathed.

"I know Edward. It's ok," I whispered, my voice still croaky.

"It's not," he said looking down at me, his eyes still sad.

"It's in the past Edward. I overreacted before. You are here now that's all that matters. Just promise it won't happen again."

"I already have Bella."

"I want to hear it again," I muttered a small smile forming. Edward smiled back, but it didn't reach his eyes. He brought his hand to my cheek.

"I promise that I will never ever leave you again," he said. I smiled again, he could tell me this a thousand times and I would still smile every time. I would never tire of hearing it. I wanted to stay like that with him but unfortunately at that moment I let out a big yawn.

"Go to sleep Bella," he murmured softly in my ear and then, before I could argue, he started humming my lullaby. My eyes started to droop. I fought, momentarily, to stay awake.

"I love you Edward Cullen," I muttered. He touched his lips gently to mine.

"And I love you Isabella Swan…now sleep," he whispered and began humming again. I did as he said. I closed my eyes and let the melody take over me, drifting into unconsciousness.

*~*~*

**So that was the chapter. I hope you liked it, I know some bits were a bit sad but it ended kind of happy.**

**Anyway thanks for reading. Please, please review. **


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Hey guys. Yes, don't worry you aren't going crazy this is an actual update. I know it's been forever and I want to thank you for being patient. I promise I will never take this long to update again and I promise no matter what that I will finish this story, so just stick with me.**

**Anyway thanks for being so great and supportive and I hope you enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**EPOV**

As I lay on the bed waiting for Bella my mind flashed back to all the other times I waited for her in her room. Only this time I was getting impatient. _How long can she stay in the shower?_ I questioned silently. Just then my question was answered. Bella entered the room and closed the door softly behind her. Her face looked disappointed like someone had let her down. I wondered what that was about. She walked slowly to the closet and it was then that I noticed she was wearing just a towel. I stared at her taking in her beauty and then realised that she didn't know I was in her room. I watched her for a moment longer and then coughed softly, alerting her to my presence. She turned abruptly and I was worried that the towel she was wearing would fall off. She grinned at me.

"Edward," she said, her smile growing. I smiled in response. It was nice too see that my presence could make her so happy. I looked up and down her figure, fighting the urge to run and kiss her. Bella's eyes followed my gaze and it was then that she must have remembered she was in a towel. Her face became a deep shade of red and she turned so her back was to me. A small smile played at my lips.

"Umm, I…uh…um," Bella stuttered, causing me to laugh. The whole situation was like a scene from a movie. I got up from the bed and exited the room, leaving Bella alone to get dressed. I dawdled to the lounge room and sat down on the couch. As I sat there I couldn't get the image of Bella out of my mind. She was flawless.

About ten minutes later I was pulled from my thoughts when I heard Bella open her bedroom door. As she approached the couch, her heart began to beat faster. She avoided looking at me as she sat down on the couch. Her face was a deep red and I couldn't help but smile at the sight before me. Bella took a sideways glance at me and frowned.

"I thought you had gone," she muttered. My smile faded and every inch of my body stiffened. My chest screamed out in pain. It felt like she had just plunged a knife into my heart. She didn't trust me. I let out a big gust of air trying to ease the pain that was building up inside me.

"Bella," I sighed. "I said I wouldn't," I said. The hurt in my voice was clear. I stared at Bella's face. She wouldn't look at me; she was staring intently at the floor. "Will you look at me?" I pleaded. I felt, at that moment, that if I could just look into her eyes everything would be ok. She would see how much I love her and take me back. She ignored me and turned her head away. I let out an exasperated sigh and moved so I was sitting right beside her. I placed my hand under her chin and gently lifted her face so I was staring into her deep, brown eyes. The touch of her skin sent a jolt through my body.

"Bella, I love you," I whispered, my eyes begging her to believe me. She stared back, her eyes searching mine. "I'm not going anywhere," I added, my voice shaking. Bella turned her face from me. I could see that she didn't believe me. This sent a tremor of pain through out my body. She doubted me. I had to show her that I wasn't going to leave her again. I placed the palms of my hands on her cheeks and turned her face so she was looking at me once again. I stared at her for a moment and then tilted my head toward her. Just as our lips were about to touch she spoke.

"Edward…, please don't," she pleaded, a solitary tear trickling down her cheek.

"Why?" I questioned, trying my best to keep my voice unemotional. It didn't work. The pain that coursed through me was clearly evident. The nagging doubt, that Bella no longer needed me, resurfaced.

"Because if you do it will make it that much harder if…, when you leave," she whispered. My eyes closed and I let out a frustrated sigh.

"Bella," I groaned trying, but failing, to hide the frustration that I felt. "I promise I will never leave you again. You are my life. I love you. Please believe me," I begged, my voice cracking with desperation. Bella stared at me for what felt like an eternity. My body tingled as I waited in anticipation for her response.

"I believe you," she finally whispered. Relief washed through me and a grin spread across my face. Without thinking I leaned my head forward and crashed my lips to Bella's. As our lips moved against each other, it dawned on me that my dreams were nothing compared to the real thing. Feeling Bella's warm breath, her lips, hearing her heart race, I realised just how much I missed everything about her. I had to be closer to her. As Bella tangled her hands in my hair I placed my hands on her hips and pulled her toward me. I could feel her warm skin against mine and it sent shocks through my body. I wanted to remain like that for ever but unfortunately, like all good things, it had to end. I could feel the fire in my throat become harsher and harsher. Eventually it became too much, so reluctantly, I pulled away, leaving us both gasping for air.

"I'm sorry," Bella mumbled still slightly breathless. I shook my head and smiled.

"Don't be," I whispered, kissing her on the forehead and pulling her against my chest. She looked up at me.

"Edward, I love you," she smiled.

"I love you too," I replied, touching my lips softly to hers. I lay back further on the couch and she buried her head in my chest. A wave of contentment washed through me. In that moment nothing else mattered, that moment was perfect because Bella and I were together.

*~*~*

Bella and I remained on the couch for hours. Neither of us spoke, we both just sat enjoying each other's company in silence. I glanced at the clock and realised that it was midnight.

"Bella, it's late. You should probably get some rest," I said, breaking the hours of silence. She looked at the clock and then turned to me. I could tell that she was exhausted just by looking at her.

"I'm not tired," she lied.

"Bella," I growled, "You need to sleep". She looked at me about to argue when she let out a big yawn. I knew I had won. Her face dropped.

"Fine," she sighed, admitting defeat. She began getting off the couch when an idea flashed through my head. Within a second, before Bella even realised I had picked her up and carried her to her room.

"Edward, I am perfectly capable of walking. Put me down," she whinged. I smiled at her and then obliged dropping her on the bed. Her face was annoyed which caused me to chuckle. This made her angry and she glared at me before stomping off to the bathroom. I lay down on the bed and waited for her to return, unable to wipe the grin off my face.

When she returned she glared at me again, before hopping into the other side of the very large bed. When she had drawn the covers over her body she turned so her back was toward me. I held back another laugh before moving closer to her.

"You know, you're not supposed to go to sleep angry," I breathed seductively in her ear.

"I'm not angry," she replied sharply, "I'm annoyed. First you carry me and then you laugh at me." I stayed silent for a moment and then spoke.

"I'm sorry," I breathed. "I just forgot how cute you look when you're annoyed. I missed it," I added as I stroked her hair. I heard her heart beat quicken momentarily and I knew I had been forgiven. Bella sighed and then turned snuggling into my chest.

"Four years and you can still do it," she muttered.

"Do what?' I asked looking down at her.

"Dazzle me," she whispered. My face spread into a smile.

"Do I really?" I questioned. She nodded her head against my chest causing my smile to become bigger. I was glad I still had an effect on her because she still had a hold on me. I moved my lips and kissed her softly on the forehead before proceeding to her ear. "Good…because you still amaze me," I breathed, my lips brushing against her ear. I felt her smile against my chest.

"This has to be a dream," she mumbled disbelief dawning through her. I cupped my hand on her cheek and tilted my head toward her.

"It's not a dream Bella," I whispered before crashing my lips into hers. Her heart began to race and I pulled away gasping for air. It was at that moment that I realised how much I missed the thundering beat of her heart. I moved my head and rested my ear against her chest.

"I missed this," I admitted as I listened to the thuds. She blushed in response. "Oh and this," I added stroking her cheek. She blushed even more and I chuckled before placing my arm around her shoulder again. Both of us sat silent for a moment but I knew it wouldn't last long. I could tell just by looking at her that Bella wanted to ask me something.

"Edward," she said, confirming my suspicions. She hesitated momentarily, and then continued, "Why did you leave? You said you lied…what was the real reason?" she asked. I gulped as my body stiffened. Dread, guilt and anguish pulsed through my body. I searched for a way to avoid the question but that wasn't going to happen. Bella moved into a sitting position, staring intently at me. I closed my eyes as the pain of my actions four years ago crushed me.

"I was hoping you wouldn't ask me that," I breathed, opening my eyes to deep brown orbs. Sadness, pain, hurt, shame and guilt rushed through my eyes simultaneously and I turned my head trying to prolong the inevitable. Bella put one hand on my cheek and turned it so I was facing her again.

"Please tell me," she pleaded and I couldn't deny her. I would do anything she asked of me. My only wish was that I didn't have to hurt her so much by doing so.

"Ok," I nodded gently. "Just let me explain everything before you say anything, ok. No interruptions." She nodded and placed her hands in mine. Her face was understanding and curious as she waited. I tried to hold on to that, not wanting to crush it. I knew that my admission would hurt her and make her angry. However, I reluctantly continued.

"Well," I said not quite sure how to begin. My voice shook. "At the time I thought it was for the best. It seemed that you kept getting hurt because of me…first James then Jasper. My presence kept putting you in danger. You kept getting hurt because of what I am. I wanted you to have a chance at a normal life and I knew that if you were with me you couldn't. I left to keep you safe," I explained looking deep into Bella's eyes. I could see that she was angry. She opened her mouth to say something but I stopped her. I had to finish explaining first. "Let me finish before you say anything," I begged. She nodded and closed her mouth.

"I didn't want you to get hurt, I wanted to protect you. I can see now it was a huge mistake but, at the time, I thought it was for the best. I thought it was the only way to keep you safe," I added, pleading for her to understand. She looked away from me and I watched as her face gradually crossed from pain to anger.

"And you thought I shouldn't have gotten a say in _my _safety. That I shouldn't have gotten a say in my life," she snapped. I let out a long sigh. This was exactly what I didn't want to happen. I knew it was stupid and I would regret it for the rest of my life. "It didn't work Edward. I'm not safe and I am in pain. If you had of just spoken to me instead of ignoring me it would've saved me…, us a lot of heartbreak," Bella added, her voice cold. Tears started to fall down her cheeks and my chest clenched in pain. I didn't want to make Bella cry. I yearned to reach out and dry her tears, or say the words that would get her to forgive me but I knew I didn't deserve it. If Bella didn't think I was a monster before she certainly did now.

"I know Bella," I admitted my voice deep and full of sorrow. "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have left. If I could go back I would, but I can't." I added, but she interrupted me before I could finish.

"Why didn't you come back for me?" she questioned and my face fell. Shame and guilt began to take over me again.

"I wanted to Bella, believe me. But I couldn't, I couldn't put you in danger. I love you too much. You have to understand that there wasn't a day where I didn't think about you. I know I wasn't there when…, when it mattered but I'm here now," I tried explaining but even I knew how pathetic it sounded. Bella stayed silent for a moment and then she pulled her hands away from mine. This small gesture was enough to shatter my already broken dead heart.

"Edward the only reason you are here now is because you ran into me at the hospital. Can you honestly say that if you knew I was working there you would've taken the job? If you didn't accidently run into me at the hospital would you be here?" she asked. My whole body clenched and it actually caused me physical pain. The truth was that I wouldn't have been there if I had known. I looked at my hands, too ashamed to answer.

"That's what I thought," she whispered, choking back tears. I looked up and reached for her hands but she snatched them away. I buried my head in my hands and she moved as far from me as she could. The bed began shaking as she sobbed. I clenched my fists as pain racked through my body with each sob that left Bella. I began breathing deeply, holding back the pain and anguish that wished to escape.

Bella let out a small whimper and after an hour of what felt like torture I couldn't take anymore.

"Bella," I breathed, my voice sounding as broken as I felt. She didn't answer. I closed my eyes before speaking again.

"Bella talk to me. Tell me what's going on in your head," I pleaded. She ignored me again.

"Bella please, I love you. Talk to me," I begged, holding back the sobs that so desperately wanted to escape. No answer.

"This is why I didn't want to tell you," I muttered to myself, too softly for Bella to hear. I sat silent for a few minutes hoping that Bella would turn around and speak to me again. She didn't and I had no idea what I could do to make it better.

"Do you want me to leave?" I asked, praying silently that she said no. Her body stiffened as she wiped a hand across her cheeks. She then turned to look at me, her swollen eyes staring into mine.

"No. I don't ever want you to leave," she croaked, her voice hoarse. She moved closer to me and rested her head against my chest. I wrapped my arm around her. Even with her in my arms like this I still felt despicable. I hated myself for causing the person that I love so much pain.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I hate that I caused you so much pain," I breathed.

"I know Edward. It's ok," she whispered, trying to make me feel better. But I didn't deserve it.

"It's not," I admitted, another wave of guilt and shame washing over me. I looked down at her, my eyes sad.

"It's in the past Edward. I overreacted before. You are here now that's all that matters. Just promise it won't happen again," she said. She already knew it wouldn't happen again. Even if I wanted to leave I couldn't, Bella was the very best part of me.

"I already have Bella."

"I want to hear it again," she muttered smiling. I looked down at her and couldn't help but smile back. I placed my hand on her cheek and then spoke.

"I promise that I will never ever leave you again," I said causing her to smile. At that moment I actually did start to feel better. I knew I would never fully forgive myself for leaving but I was with Bella at that moment and that's what really mattered. I looked down at her just as she let out a big yawn. That's when I remembered how late it was. I moved my lips to her ear.

"Go to sleep Bella," I murmured and then began humming her lullaby. Bella's eyes started to droop.

"I love you Edward Cullen," she muttered sleepily. I kissed her gently on the lips.

"And I love you Isabella Swan…now sleep," I replied. I began humming her lullaby again and within a few seconds she was fast asleep.

***~*~***

**Again thanks for sticking with me I promise to update asap. **


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Hey guys. Yes this is actually is a real update…finally. I know it's been ages, well longer than ages actually. I'm so sorry for that. Thanks to everyone who has stuck with me. To answer everyone's question, Yes I will be finishing this story. I promise. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*~*~*

**BPOV**

When I woke the next morning I wasn't sure if last night was a dream or not. I tried to rewind to the last thing that I knew was real…but I came up blank. _What actually happened?_ I questioned silently. I scrunched my face up clamping my eyes shut. If it was all just a dream I didn't want to wake up. If the only place I could have Edward was in my dreams I would sleep for eternity. It was then that I felt the ice cold arm around me. I jerked awake turning my head to look at the angel that lay beside me. Edward's eyes burned into mine concern and worry crossing them.

"It wasn't a dream," I murmured silently, a smile spreading across my face. Edward relaxed and he smiled back, as he brought his hand up and gently stroked my cheek. I leaned into his hand, enjoying the feel of his skin against mine. I sat like that for several moments before the events of the past week all came flooding back. _Victoria. _All my muscles tensed at the thought of her name and my whole body became numb. So numb, that I could no longer feel Edward's hand on my cheek. My smile faded and I gulped as the seriousness of the situation crashed down around me. A wave of panic coursed through me.

"Bella, what's going on?" Edward asked, pulling me from my thoughts. I quickly composed myself, putting a smile on my face before looking up at him. He frowned, knowing what I was going to say before I said it.

"I'm fine," I lied. Edward let out a frustrated sigh.

"Bella, I know something is wrong. Tell me…please," he pleaded his golden eyes burning into mine. I let out a small sigh before speaking.

"Edward, it's nothing," I started. Edward opened his mouth to speak but I interrupted before he could. "Really I'm fine". Edward looked like he was about to argue but something stopped him and he let it go. Instead he smiled at me.

"So," Edward said smiling, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear. "Whilst you were sleeping I was thinking that maybe we should go to work today." I glanced at the clock behind him; it said it was 6:00 am. My shift was supposed to start at seven. However I wasn't going to go.

"Oh, uh Edward I don't know," I whispered feeling uneasy. "With the whole Victoria thing I think I should stay home. You know make sure my Dad and Jake and everyone will be ok." Edward smiled.

"Bella, we both need to go back to work. There's nothing you can do here except worry. The pack is well equipped to take care of themselves," Edward reasoned, leaning in and gently placing his lips to my forehead. The skin where he kissed tingled. I considered what Edward said for a moment. I knew that he was right; there was nothing I could do to protect anyone if Victoria did come here. If I really wanted to stop her, I would have to find her before she was able to find my friends and family. However, to do that, I would have to get away from Edward. Suddenly an idea formed in my head.

"Edward, maybe you should go and I'll stay and make sure everything's ok," I said hoping that he would accept this plan. He didn't. Edward's face became serious and all lightness was gone.

"Bella, I'm not going without you. I promised I would never leave your side again and I plan to keep that promise. So either we both go or we both stay". Edward's eyes burned into mine with such intensity that I couldn't say no to him.

"Fine,' I sighed, "we'll go. Just let me get ready and say goodbye to everyone first." Edward beamed and pecked me softly on the lips, before lifting me up from the bed and carrying me too the bathroom. When he placed my feet down on the cool tiles I glared up at him, annoyance rising within me.

"You know how much I hate that," I grumbled, crossing my arms over my chest. Edward chuckled and smiled my favourite crooked smile. Instantly my annoyance faded and my heart began to race. Edward and I stared at each other for a moment and then he turned around and shut the bathroom door behind him. I let out a deep sigh, placing my hand to my chest as my heart slowly returned to normal. I sluggishly undressed and stepped into the shower. As the warm water cascaded down my body I could feel all the tension from my muscles melt away.

As my body relaxed I tried to think of ways that I could get to Victoria without anyone knowing. It was going to be particularly difficult considering one of my best friends could see the future and my boyfriend was apparently not going to leave my side. Eventually, I decided to give up so I turned the shower off and stepped out into the cool morning air. I quickly dried myself off and dressed into my nurse's uniform, pulling my hair into a ponytail before heading towards the door. As I opened the bathroom door my mind wandered again. I came to the same problem every time, even if I did find a suitable plan Alice would definitely see it and stop me… unless….

Before I could finish that train of thought I felt a sudden pain in my wrist. I lifted it up too see droplets of red blood dripping from a thin cut. I had grazed my arm on a thin nail that just poked out in the doorway. Usually the sight of this blood would make me woozy and I'd become faint, but ever since the _"accident", _blood no longer seemed to bother me. I guess if you see a lot of something, you become accustomed to it. Just as I was about to turn around to go clean myself up Edward was there with a band aid. I looked at his face as he tended to my arm. I watched for any sign of a struggle as he gently cleaned the cut and then placed a band aid over it. His face looked completely composed; there was no struggle, no sign that he was tempted by my blood at all. I smiled up at him.

"That's seems easier for you now," I murmured, "the blood I mean. Do I not smell as good to you now," I asked suddenly feeling self conscious. I knew it was stupid and completely wrong to be feeling self conscious but my blood was one of the things that brought us together, if that was gone what would it mean for us. Edward chuckled and shook his head.

"Bella let me get this straight," Edward said a look of bemusement on his face. "You're worried that I am no longer tempted by your blood. That you don't smell as good to me as you once did?" he asked. I nodded, looking at Edward and for the first time noticing the age difference. Edward was beautiful, everything about him was perfect and it always would be. I, on the other hand, well let's just say I could notice the four years difference between us.

"Is it because I'm older?" I asked feeling upset. I dropped my head and stared at the floor. Edward laughed again.

"Bella," he whispered, gently lifting my chin with his hand so he could look into my eyes. "You still tempt me, you always will. It doesn't matter how old you are. It's just easier now…because… well, I know how it feels to lose you and that's a pain worse than the burning. That is a pain I can't endure." Edward pulled me against his chest, wrapping both his arms around me. All the self conscious feelings left me, replaced by a feeling of total and utter contentment. "Besides," he murmured in my ear a few seconds later, "it's not just your blood that tempts me". I felt a faint blush rise in my cheeks and I was suddenly aware of every inch of Edward's body pressing against mine. My heart raced and a hot flush pulsed through my body. Edward chuckled and then let me go. He crashed his lips to mine, in a kiss so intense I could hardly believe that it was Edward. He had never kissed me like that before. However before it could go any further a small cough sounded from beside us. Reluctantly we pulled away to see Jake and Seth staring at us. Jake had a look of disgust on his face, whilst Seth just looked incredibly embarrassed. That made two of us. I stepped away from Edward, my face turning a deep red. My eyes looked anywhere but at Jake.

"Uh, sorry to interrupt," Jake said sarcastically. "I need to talk to you for a second," he added turning towards Edward. Edward's face went blank. I assumed that he had just listened to Jake's thoughts and whatever was going on wasn't good. All the embarrassment faded.

"What happened?" I asked, becoming worried. "What's wrong?" Both boys looked at each other, nodded and then looked at me.

"Nothing Jake just wants to come to the hospital with us today," Edward said his face turning light. I looked at him for a few moments and then at Jake, both boys seemed to be telling the truth but there was something inside me that felt wrong.

"Are you sure that's it?" I questioned feeling uneasy. Jake nodded.

"Yes of course," Edward answered, smiling.

"Ok," I replied, "but I think you should stay here Jake. Look after Charlie." Jake nodded but didn't speak. He just walked away. I glanced at Seth who had gone unnoticed this whole time. "What's wrong with him?" I asked. Seth shrugged.

"I don't know," Seth answered avoiding my gaze. "Anyway I'll see you later Bella, I gotta go." He smiled and gave me a small wave before turning around and leaving me alone with Edward.

"Ok what's wrong with both of them?" I enquired, feeling slightly uneasy still. "Is it Victoria?" Edward shook his head. I stared at him intently watching his face for any sign that he was lying.

"No, of course not," he answered, "Jacob just doesn't feel right letting you go without him and Seth…well, he felt awkward for interrupting us before." Edwards face didn't show anything, I could not tell if he was telling the truth or not. He seemed to notice my hesitation and he spoke again. "Bella, I swear everything's fine just trust me." I couldn't fight him anymore; Edward had no reason to lie to me.

"Ok I trust you. Just let me say goodbye to Charlie and then we can go." Edward grabbed my hand before I could leave. He smiled at me, but there was something off in his smile.

"Charlie just went down the street. He left whilst you were in the shower, he wanted to say goodbye but I told him I'd tell you."

"Uh ok then. Let's go," I said smiling back. In the back of my mind there was a voice telling me that something wasn't right, but I ignored it and walked with Edward toward the door. When we got to the door, Edward opened it, pausing to le me through first. I obliged stepping out into the cool morning. As I stepped out I saw Jake. I smiled and waved. He did the same and then left going around the side of the house so I could no longer see him. My mouth turned into a frown and I promised that I would talk to him when I got home. Edward closed the front door behind him and then we approached to his car, where he opened the passenger door and helped into the seat. When I was seated he closed the door and within a second he was sitting beside me and we were backing out of the driveway.

As I sat in the car my mind flashed back too the kiss that Edward and I had shared before we were interrupted. That kiss had been so intense, it was like nothing I had ever experienced before. Without realizing, I stared at Edward a small smile on my lips. I only realised I was staring when Edward spoke.

"Bella, why are you staring at me?" he asked. My cheeks became pink and I turned away. Edward laughed, apparently realising what was going through my head. In response I turned bright red. Fortunately I was saved from any further embarrassment, when we drove into the hospital parking lot. Edward pulled into the first parking space that was available. When he stopped the car I became anxious. What would everyone think about me arriving with Edward? Everyone seemed to like Edward; everyone had a crush on him. They were all going to stare at us. I gulped, _great._ Edward opened my door and waited for me to exit. When I didn't he knew something was wrong.

"What's the matter," he questioned. I looked up at him and frowned.

"Everyone is going to stare at us when go in together," I admitted. Edward let out a small laugh.

"Let them stare. As long as I'm with you nothing else matters," Edward replied, offering me his hand. I took it and stepped out of the car. I heard the door close and then Edward placed his hand in mine again and we walked toward the hospital entrance.

*~*~*

I spent the rest of the morning answering questions about Edward. Everyone, even some of the female doctors who I had never spoken too before, seemed interested. I answered all their questions, feeling that it was better to get all the questions out of the way. By the time lunch came around I was exhausted. At twelve I went to the nurse's station and told Nurse Jones that I was going on break. She glared at me, apparently jealous that I was with Edward. I couldn't help but laugh as I walked away from her. I walked down the deserted corridor to the lunch room. As I passed an empty exam room an arm poked out and grabbed my shoulder. I let out a small yelp as a shiver ran down my spine from the shock of the cold hand that touched my skin. I looked at the person and relief washed through me.

"Jasper," I exclaimed breathlessly. "You scared me." I brought my hand up to my chest.

"Sorry," Jasper muttered looking guilty.

"Its fine," I said, "I just didn't expect to see you here…wait what are you doing here? Is everything ok? Is it Victoria?" I asked panic rising. Japer shook his head.

"No, it's not that. We haven't been able to find her…at all. I came here to apologise," Jasper whispered, his eyes staring at the floor.

"What for?" I asked feeling confused. Then my conversation with Alice a few days earlier came flooding back. "_Well Bella he kinda…well he blames himself for what happened…with you and Edward," _Alice's voice spoke in my head. "Oh," I said realising what he meant. "Jasper I don't blame you for what happened, it wasn't your fault," I assured him. Jasper looked up at me and I smiled at him. He smiled back but I could see that he still blamed himself.

"Thanks Bella," he murmured. We stood there in silence for a few minutes. Finally Jasper spoke, breaking the silence. "Anyway, I should go. Alice will be wondering where I am."

"Ok, it was nice seeing you again Jas," and without thinking I hugged him. Jasper went stiff and I thought that I had made a horrible mistake, but then he wrapped both his arms around my shoulders and hugged me back. "I guess four years really does make a big difference," I muttered. Jasper pulled away and looked down at me, a genuine smile on his face.

"I guess it does," he replied and then he was gone. I left the empty exam room and made my way toward the cafeteria. Just as I was opening the cafeteria doors I felt a buzzing in my pocket. I placed my hand in my pocket and my wrapped my fingers around my mobile phone which was vibrating furiously. I glanced down at the phone before flipping it open. The word "Dad" shined back at me. I smiled before I opened the phone and spoke into the receiver.

"Hey Dad," I said. Instantly I knew something was wrong. Silence greeted me on the other en. "Dad," I gulped, panic and worry washing through me as the other end remained silent. "Dad," I yelled, finding it hard to breathe. Finally somebody replied. I listened as the voice on the other end spoke. The phone dropped out of my hand. It wasn't my dad.

*~*~*

**A/N: Oooooo I wonder who the voice was? Not that it's overly hard to guess. Anyway I hope you all enjoyed the chapter.**

**Reviews are appreciated **

**Thanks again for sticking with me xx**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Hey guys sorry it's been a while but to make it up too you I'm posting 2 chapters instead of one. Anyway I hope you enjoy it and thanks for reading.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

**EPOV**

As I lay there watching Bella sleep I couldn't help but smile. Two days ago Bella wouldn't talk to me and now… now she was back in my arms, back in her rightful place and nothing would change that. I would never let her go again, well not unless she no longer wanted me…but that wouldn't happen. Would it? A feeling of uneasiness washed over me and my mind began to reel with the possibility of Bella growing tired of me. Luckily someone else's thoughts invaded my mind before I could become too consumed with my own worries.

"_What are you doing Jacob?"_ The mind questioned and I soon recognised it was Jacob Black. _"He doesn't need to know, you can handle it"_, a feeling of self-doubt and uncertainty passed through his head and he hesitated a moment longer before thoughts of leaving appeared. Before he could do so, I hesitantly let go of Bella and opened the door. Jacob glared at me.

"I thought I told you to stay out of my head," he whispered.

"It's a bit hard when your thoughts are screaming at me," I whispered back not wanting to wake Bella. "What's the matter?" I asked still unable to see what was actually bothering him. Jacob became serious and I could still hear the internal battle waging inside his head. It seemed that his hatred of me won out.

"It's nothing, I can handle it," he muttered but I could sense that he still doubted that.

"We both know that isn't true otherwise you wouldn't be here," I said enjoying the moment a bit more than I should have. Jacob sighed, giving up on whatever thing he planned on saying next.

"Fine," he sighed letting his breath out in a whoosh. "Charlie is missing, he left hours ago and we haven't seen him since. We've tried calling but there's no answer," Jacob said his voice soft. I could see that he was worried; he knew what this would do to Bella. If Bella were to lose her father it would kill her…, I wouldn't let that happen. Jacob stared at the ground and for the first time I could see why Bella was friends with Jacob Black. The concern he showed for Bella and her father at that moment gave me a glimpse of the real Jacob.

"I don't know how we're going to tell Bella," Jacob whispered more to himself than to me.

"We shouldn't tell her, at least no yet. Not until we know what has actually happened," I replied. Jacob looked at me and nodded, he didn't want to cause Bella anymore pain. Neither of us was comfortable with lying to Bella but it was better than worrying her. Once we knew what happened to Charlie we would tell her.

"Do you have any idea what happened, is there any explanation of where he could have gone?" I asked dreading the answer. Jacob shook his head.

"No we went to the diner where he said he'd be but we didn't find any sign of him. I thought that maybe…," he hesitated before continuing, obviously finding it hard to speak the next words, "maybe you and your family or coven, whatever you call it, could have a look around." I frowned; it seemed that the brief moment of politeness between Jacob and I had faded. In spite of this I nodded my head in response to his question.

"My _family_ will be perfectly happily to look around seeing as though your pack seems inadequate," I said, ignoring the death glare that Jacob shot at me as I pulled out my mobile phone and dialled Alice's number. My sister's chirpy voice answered on the second ring.

"Hey Edward, I was going to call you before but I thought I would let you have some time with Bella. Jas and I didn't find anything in Forks. Victoria seems to have disappeared," she explained, her voice free of the cheer and joy that normally filled it. I felt a wave of anger pass through me, followed by a wave of worry. Alice seemed to notice my worry. "Edward what's happened, did something happen to Bella?"

"No, it's Charlie. He's gone missing," I replied.

"Oh no," Alice gasped. "But you don't think Victoria did something…, I would have seen it."

'I don't know Alice but I need you guys to go check out the spot we think he went missing."

"Yeah sure, we'll go now. I'll ring you later and let you know what happens," Alice said. She tried to hide it but I could tell she felt bad for not seeing this. However before I could tell her that she wasn't to blame and she couldn't possibly see everything that went on she ended the call. I placed my phone back in my pocket and then turned to Jacob.

"They'll ring us if they find anything," I told him and then turned closing the door gently behind me. Jacob hesitated at the door for a few seconds and I swear I heard a whispered thankyou before he walked back outside. As I approached Bella's sleeping body a feeling of fear passed through me. What if we were too late to save Charlie? I stared at Bella. If something happened to Charlie it would kill her and I don't think I'd be able to help her through it. Fear crushed down on me leaving me feeling weak and inadequate for what felt like the fiftieth time that day.

I entered the bed and lay down next to Bella, hugging her close too me. Just being near Bella seemed to take away some of the fear and my head cleared. I had to stay strong through all this. I had to stay strong for Bella.

*~*~*

At about 5:30 am, Bella became restless and began speaking indistinctly. I hugged her closer to me, trying to comfort her as much as I could. It seemed to work, she became silent and a small smile crossed her face. Moments later she jerked away from me a look of surprise on her face. My eyebrows scrunched in concern.

"It wasn't a dream," Bella murmured and I immediately relaxed, stroking her cheek with my hand. Her skin was warm under my hand and it sent a tingling sensation up my arm. I smiled enjoying the familiarity of the whole situation. We sat like that for a moment before her body tensed and a look of terror crossed over her face. Instantly her smile faded. My mind started thinking of all the things that could possibly have upset her but nothing came to mind. I stared at her, feebly attempting to get a glimpse into her mind.

"Bella, what's going on?" I questioned, voicing the concerns that plagued my mind. She turned to me, a fake smile on her face and I knew what she was going to say before she said it. Frustration began to build up in me. As always it was times like this I most wanted to hear the inner workings of Bella's mind.

"I'm fine," she lied. I let my frustration out in one long sigh.

"Bella, I know something is wrong. Tell me…please," I pleaded trying to convince her with the force of my gaze. She let out a small sigh and then spoke

"Edward, it's nothing," she replied speaking before I could interrupt her. "Really I'm fine." I stared at her preparing for a retort but thought better of it. There was no need to push her at this stage. If things did turn out badly with Charlie I didn't want her to feel any other unnecessary pressure. Instead I smiled at her and changed the subject.

"So," I began, pushing a stray hair behind her ear. "Whilst you were sleeping I was thinking maybe we should go to work today," I suggested. This was a plan in distracting her today. If she was at work she wouldn't become suspicious of Charlie's absence and it would give us a chance of figuring out what was going on before telling her.

"Oh, uh Edward I don't know," she whispered uneasily. "With the whole Victoria thing I think I should stay home. You know make sure my Dad and Jake and everyone will be ok." I felt a pang of pain at the mention of Charlie's name, which was then followed by a stab of guilt at keeping his disappearance from Bella. However I placed a smile on my face hiding it the best I could before speaking.

"Bella, we both need to go back to work. There's nothing you can do here except worry. The pack is well equipped to take care of themselves," I reasoned. I kissed her on the forehead hoping that it would distract her enough to accept my plan.

"Edward, maybe you should go and I'll stay and make sure everything's ok," she suggested. All lightness left my face as I spoke again.

"Bella, I'm not going without you. I promised I would never leave your side again and I plan to keep that promise. So either we both go or we both stay". I stared into her eyes with burning intensity. This seemed to do the trick.

"Fine," Bella sighed, "we'll go. Just let me get ready and say goodbye to everyone first." I kissed her softly on the lips before lifting her and carrying her to the bathroom. When I placed her down on the bathroom tiles she glared up at me.

"You know how much I hate that,' she grumbled and I couldn't stop the laughter that escaped my lips. We stared at each other for a second and then I pulled the bathroom door shut leaving Bella to shower. I went to the kitchen and sat at the table.

I don't know how long Bella was in the shower. I was too wrapped up in my own thoughts to keep track of time. However when I heard the bathroom door open I was immediately pulled from my own head. I stood up from my chair and approached Bella. I smelt it before my brain actually had a chance to process what had happened. The scent of sweet blood washed over me and I snapped into action. I was in front of Bella within a second. I gently tended to the cut on her arm, placing a band aid over it. The whole time my throat burned, yearning to drink the blood that seeped out. This pain was miniscule compared to the pain of losing Bella so it was easier to overcome than it had once been. I looked down at Bella and she beamed up at me.

"That seems easier for you now,' she murmured, "the blood I mean. Do I not smell as good to you now?" she asked turning away from me. I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as I shook my head trying to comprehend Bella's way of thinking.

"Bella let me get this straight. You're worried that I am no longer tempted by your blood. That you don't smell as good to me as you once did?' I asked. She nodded and looked at me, suddenly self conscious. I hated seeing Bella like that.

"Is it because I'm older?" she asked her voice soft. She dropped her head and another laugh escaped my lips.

"Bella," I whispered, lifting her head so I could look into her eyes. "You still tempt me, you always will. It doesn't matter how old you are. It's just easier now…because… well, I know how it feels to lose you and that's a pain worse than the burning. That is a pain I can't endure," I explained pulling her against my chest. "Besides," I added murmuring softly in her ear, "it's not just your blood that tempts me". I felt the heat as Bella blushed. It seemed to travel down her body and I felt an indescribable desire to be closer to her. I crashed my lips to hers and our mouths moved in perfect synchronisation. I could feel Bella's heart beating against my chest and the kiss intensified. Beside us a cough sounded forcing us too pull apart. I turned and glared at Jacob.

"Uh, sorry to interrupt," he said sarcastically. "I need to talk to you for a second," he added turning towards me. I continued glaring at him. _"You'll let me know if your sister finds anything about Charlie." _Jacob asked silently so Bella wouldn't hear. The mention of Charlie brought reality crashing down and the seriousness of the situation came flooding back. My face went completely blank.

"What happened?" Bella questioned becoming worried. "What's wrong?" I glanced at Jacob nodding at him to let him know that I would inform him of any news that Alice found, then looked at Bella and placed a smile on my face.

"Nothing Jake just wants to come to the hospital with us today," I lied hoping she would believe me. Bella looked between me and Jacob for several moments.

"Are you sure that's it?" she asked. She looked at Jacob and he nodded, she then turned at me.

"Yes of course," I replied.

"Ok," Bella said finally accepting our story. "But I think you should stay here Jake. Look after Charlie." I listened to the guilty thoughts that crossed his mind at that moment and I felt bad for him. He hated keeping this from Bella as much as I did. For a second he contemplated telling her but instead he just nodded silently and walked away.

My mind was so focused on Jacobs's thoughts as he left that I didn't notice that Seth had gone and Bella was now staring at me.

"Ok what's wrong with both of them?" she questioned concern crossing her beautiful features. "Is it Victoria?" I shook my head emphatically.

"No, of course not. Jacob just doesn't feel right letting you go without him and Seth…well, he felt awkward for interrupting us before," I explained not so much lying but rather leaving out some key details. She stared at me seeming hesitant to believe what I was telling her. "Bella I swear everything's fine just trust me," I said as guilt racked through my body.

"Ok I trust you. Just let me say goodbye to Charlie and then we can go." I grabbed her hand and pulled her towards me.

"Charlie just went down the street. He left whilst you were in the shower, he wanted to say goodbye but I told him I'd tell you," I lied again.

"Uh ok then. Let's go," she said smiling up at me. And I walked with her out to the car. Once we were both in, I placed the key in the ignition and drove up the driveway. Sometime during the drive I glanced sideways at Bella and found her staring at me, a smile plastered on her face.

"Bella, why are you staring at me?" I questioned feeling a little self conscious. Bella blushed and turned her head and realisation dawned on me. She was remembering the kiss we had shared earlier. I let out a small chuckle as the image of Bella's lips against mine flashed through my head. However just as this thought popped into my head we entered the hospital car park and it was gone. I parked the car in the first available spot and hopped out, running around to open Bella's door. When she didn't rise from her seat I looked in at her.

"What's the matter," I asked. Bella frowned up at me.

"Everyone is going to stare at us when we go in together," she admitted and relief washed over me. I let out a small laugh glad that there was nothing seriously wrong with Bella.

"Let them stare. As long as I'm with you nothing else matters," I replied, offering her my hand. She placed her hand in mine and we walked like that into the hospital.

*~*~*

The rest of the morning I had to fight the urge to strangle every man that crossed my path. Apparently a lot of the male population in the hospital had a crush on Bella, but she didn't even seem to know they existed. She was still oblivious to the effect she had on men. None of them seemed to like the fact that I had been there for a short period of time and was already dating Bella. They also resented the fact that my father and I got so much attention from the females on staff. To put it simply all of them were jealous. This wasn't unusual. Being in high school for years I became used to the inner workings of the male mind. It wasn't the jealousy that bothered me; it was the other thoughts. Some of them apparently fantasised about Bella and when I heard these "fantasies" it caused anger to ripple through me. Bella was mine and seeing her like that in someone else's head made me angrier than I would have thought possible. In most cases it was easy too resist, I just shrugged it off. But one guy really got too me. His name was Dr King. He was apparently the one doctor that Bella had given a chance. She broke it off fairly soon into the relationship but he seemed to still harbour feelings for her. As he glared at me jealousy pulsed through me. I glared back and approached him.

Fortunately before I could actually say anything too him Jasper arrived and my attention was diverted to him.

"Jas, what are you doing,' I asked in sincere shock. I heard his answer before he spoke but he continued anyway, so as too keep up the human charade.

"Oh, uh I came to update you on the situation," he replied. "_Can we go somewhere private,"_ he questioned in his head, his eyes flashing to the people around us.

"Of course, let's go to Carlisles office," I answered and we both left. Only when the door closed and I was sure that no-one would overhear us I spoke again.

"So you found nothing?" I questioned.

"Nothing to suggest that Victoria was behind it," he admitted. "We asked one of the waitresses and she swore that he left with a brown-haired middle aged woman at about 10 last night." I breathed a sigh of relief, slumping into Carlisles desk chair.

"Thank God," I whispered pinching the bridge of my nose. "Thanks for doing that Jas." Jasper smiled at me and nodded.

"No problem. I'm glad that everything has worked out. Bella's been through enough." I nodded in agreement. "Anyway I'll talk to you later Edward I've got to go." Jasper exited the room and I was left alone.

*~*~*

**Thanks for reading. I hope you liked it.**

**Please review xx.**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Hi again. Here's the next chapter like I promised. Hope you enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

**BPOV**

_I listened as a voice on the other end spoke. The phone dropped out of my hand. It wasn't my dad._

It was several seconds before I could mange to lift my shaking hand to my ear. It didn't seem to matter to the cold voice on the other end. She waited for me. Every inch of my body shook uncontrollably as panic seeped through me. When I spoke however it didn't show. My voice stayed strong, not quavering like I had expected it too.

"What…what have you done to my dad?" I asked wiping away the solitary tear that trickled down my cheek. Years of preparation couldn't prepare me for the cold voice that hissed in reply.

"Nothing…yet,' she hissed, cackling insanely. As she spoke a vision of red hair and evil eyes flashed though my mind and a shiver rolled down my spine.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked, swallowing back the bile that rose in my throat. There was another blood curdling cackle and then Victoria spoke.

"I want you here…now and I'd rather not have to fight to get you," she replied, hatred dripping from every syllable. It was a hatred that wasn't humanly possible…but then the "thing" on the other end wasn't human, she was far beyond that. She was also incredibly smart. She knew that if it came to a fight she didn't stand a chance against the pack and the Cullen's. So instead she hit my weakness. "If you come then I'll spare your father. If not then lets just say you might be losing two parents tonight." Confusion clouded my mind and I found it difficult to understand what she was actually saying to me. What did she mean I might be losing _"two parents"_? Unless….

"What have you done to my mum?" I said my voice barely a whisper. The only response I got was a cackle. Then something else occurred to me. This was not the first time that one of my parents was _"kidnapped"_. "How do I know your telling the truth? You could be doing what James did?" I pointed out. Victoria let out a deafening roar at the mention of James and then the phone was silent. I thought that she had hung up. Maybe I had caught her out. I clung to that hope but I think deep down I knew that it wasn't true. Deep down, I knew that she did have my father and possibly mother. This suspicion was confirmed when a soft, familiar voice spoke.

"Bells," Charlie muttered softly his voice trying but failing to hide the pain he was suffering at the hands of Victoria. My heart shattered. Charlie was never supposed to be a part of this. He was never even meant to know that this world existed. It was my fault that he was in danger. Before I could delve any deeper into the self loathing and guilt that consumed my every thought Charlie spoke. "Bells don't come after me. Stay where you are. Get out of there with Edward and Jake. Please," he begged. But I knew this was one request I couldn't accept.

'I'm so sorry Dad," I muttered. "I should've done a better job of keeping you safe, but don't worry I promise I'm going to fix it." And I was. Speaking to Charlie seemed to give me strength and I knew exactly what I had to do.

"Bella I love you. Please just stay away," he tried again.

"I love you too Dad," I replied, avoiding promising him anything. He was too smart for his own good and he noticed this right away. But just as he was about to speak the phone was ripped out of his hands.

"In an hour I'll message you where to meet me,' she said and the line was dead. I allowed myself a solitary moment of panic where the world crashed down around me. Crushing me. Tearing out my very recently fixed heart. If anything happened to Charlie I would never forgive myself, he was never meant to know about any of this. But he did and now he was in danger and I was the only one that could stop it.

When the moment passed I gathered myself and sprung into action ignoring the unimaginable weight that pressed down on me. I dialled the phone hoping that it wasn't too late. I hadn't exactly made any decisions yet but several ideas had passed through my mind as I spoke to Victoria. I prayed that Alice was too preoccupied with something else to be focusing on me. Finally the person I was calling answered.

"Hello," the voice answered free of its usual joy.

"Hey Seth, I was uh wondering if you could come to the hospital I need to talk to you about something," I explained. Seth was an integral part of my plan. Being a werewolf he would be able to block Alice from seeing what was going on whilst I was with him. It would allow me to focus without constantly worrying that Alice would figure out what was going.

"Sure Bells, I'll be there soon," he replied his voice still sad. It reminded me of Jake this morning. He had not been himself, he….

Realisation dawned on me. Charlie was the reason why. They obviously all knew that Charlie was missing. That was the reason for the weirdness this morning. They were hiding it from me. But…but that must mean that Edward knew as well.

"_Charlie just went down the street. He left whilst you were in the shower, he wanted to say goodbye but I told him I'd tell you,"_ Edward had said to me this morning. He must have been in on it. They all lied to me. I know that I should've been angry at them for keeping it from me but I wasn't. They had tried to protect me from getting hurt and however feeble attempt it might have been, I appreciated it. Plus it was hard to focus on the lies when I would be saying goodbye to them so soon. The lies seemed insignificant. The only thing that mattered was love. It would be hard to leave them and yet it would be harder not to. I had to save my father…I had to save everyone and the only way to do that was too say goodbye.

The weight that pressed down on me was too much at that moment and I forced myself into the cafeteria to sit down. Thankfully I was alone. I pulled my legs too my chest, hugging them close too me as I closed my eyes. I breathed through the pain preparing for the darkness that was sure to consume me when Seth arrived. I don't know how long I remained like that. It couldn't have been more than 10 minutes but it may as well have been an eternity.

Fortunately I was temporarily freed from my pit of darkness when the doors to the cafeteria opened and Seth strode towards me. I must have looked worse than I assumed because his face became dark when he saw me.

"Bella what's wrong?" he asked when he reached me. I looked at him and briefly considered telling him the truth but decided I couldn't put that kind of burden on him. He didn't deserve that. I forced myself to sit up straight and plastered a smile on my face.

"Nothing, I just need you to come with me too see my Mom," I lied, saying the first thing that popped into my head. It seemed like a fairly reasonable request to me. Seth seemed to agree because some of the darkness left his face.

"Oh ok. Yeah sure," he breathed. "Um do you want to go now?" he asked.

"Uh no, not yet. I need to take care of some things first and this is going to sound weird but I need you to be with me as I do them," I muttered. Seth seemed slightly taken aback by this but he just nodded.

"Sure," he smiled. I returned the smile and then stood up walking towards the exit of the cafeteria.

"Ok, well let's find Edward because I need to talk to him about this first," I told Seth. As I walked down the empty corridor I prepared myself for the heartache that was sure to follow. I prepared to say goodbye to my life…. my existence…, my heart…, my Edward.

*~*~*

When I found Edward he was in Carlisles office. On the long walk I had considered leaving without saying goodbye to Edward. But that idea seemed to hurt more than the alternative. Edward smiled up at me as I entered the room, rushing to meet me in the middle of the room. He looked down at me momentarily and then crushed his lips to mine. I pressed my body against his, deepening the kiss. Edward responded, placing both his hands on my hips. I savoured every moment, focusing on our lips as they moved in perfect synchronisation.

When Edward pulled away he hugged me closer to him and I could feel myself faltering. How could I say goodbye to him? He was the reason for my existence and I'd only just gotten him back. Almost as soon as the doubt crossed my mind it was replaced by certainty. I had to do this. I had to say goodbye so he and the rest of my loved ones would be safe. There was no other way.

I pulled away from Edward and looked up at him, willing myself to continue. He stared down at me scrunching his brow in confusion.

"Bella what's wrong?" he queried, concern crossing his beautiful face. I took a deep breath before I spoke. My heart cracked inside my chest as the hole that had so recently healed began to tear open. I fought back the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes, composing my face so that it was free of the emotion that burned inside me.

"Edward I don't think I can do this anymore." I spoke hurriedly, trying to get the words out as quickly as possible. "I thought I could but I can't it's just too hard." Edward stepped towards me his hand outstretched. It took all my strength to step away from him. And when I saw the pain that crossed Edwards face I almost didn't.

"What are you talking about Bella?" he asked his voice barely a whisper. I pulled my eyes from his gaze unable to look at him any longer.

"Edward I thought I could do this but I can't. You've hurt me too much and I can't just forget it," I muttered my whole body tensing from the pain that coursed through it. I was amazed that I was still able to stand. Edward let out an unnecessary breath.

"Bella, I love you. Let me fix this," he begged, stepping in front of me and lifting my chin so our eyes met. He stared at me and the pain shone through. I yearned to hold him close too me. My heart ached but my head forced me to do what was right. It was then that I realised what I had to say for him to let me go.

"Edward I love you too," I murmured stepping back from him. "I always will but the pain is just too much. Every time I'm with you I get hurt and I can't do it anymore. You were right I don't belong in your world," I lied, the hole in my heart forcing me to breathe deeply to avoid from collapsing. "If you really care about me you'll let me go," I whispered softly and I turned towards the door. My legs wobbled beneath me and I allowed myself one last glance at Edward before I clasped my hand around the handle. He stood there frozen, staring at me as I walked away from him. His face was blank and I wondered what was going on in his head as he watched me go. Briefly my mind flashed back to the forest where Edward and I had first parted. Back then it had been me who watched the love of my life walk away from me. Now I was the one that said goodbye and it didn't feel any better. Every inch of my body ached and I still yearned to hold Edward and never let go. I let a solitary tear streak down my face as I opened the door and exited the room leaving behind my heart with the only boy I had ever loved. When I closed the door behind me Seth looked up at me. He seemed to notice the tear that had escaped and opened his mouth to question me about it. Before he could I spoke.

"Ok I just need to make a phone call but I can do that when we get to the airport. We can go now," I told him putting on the best smile I could manage. He nodded and then we both walked out of the hospital and got into his car.

*~*~*

We finally arrived at the airport an hour later. Sometime whilst we were pulling into an empty parking bay my phone vibrated alerting me to the message that I just received. I pulled out my phone and gasped when I saw the word "Dad" shining back at me. I flipped the phone open and read the message.

Forks….

I didn't have to read the rest of the message to know where in Forks she was. There was only one place she would be, my old house. A shiver went down my spine and I turned to Seth.

"Hey so there's been a change of plan, It turns out my mom is in Port Angeles so there's no need to catch a plane anymore." I had to keep Seth with me for as long as possible but I knew eventually I would have to ditch him. Port Angeles seemed like the perfect place to do that

"Uh, ok. Are you sure everything's alright Bella?" He questioned, seeming suspicious of my actions.

"Everything is fine." He stared at me. "I promise," I added, "I just need to make a phone call and then we can leave ok." Seth nodded and I exited the car prepping myself for the second hardest thing I would have to do…saying goodbye to Jake. I inhaled deeply and dialled the familiar number.

"Hello," Jake answered. I exhaled and spoke trying to keep my voice level.

'Hey Jake um I need to talk to you." When Jake didn't say anything I continued. "Uh ok I'm leaving."

"What? What are you talking about?" Jake asked clearly surprised by the sudden announcement.

"Yeah Jake I'm sorry but I just can't stay here anymore. I'm leaving with Edward. We need to be alone for a little while," I lied hoping that he wouldn't come chasing after me.

"Bells, I don't get it. Why can't you just stay here? Is the bloodsucker forcing you to go with him?" he snapped angrily.

"No of course not. Jake we won't be gone for long but we just need to sort some stuff out and we can't do that with everyone else around. I'm really sorry," I admitted sincerely. Jake let out an angry breath.

"Bella this doesn't make any sense."

"I'm sorry Jake I love you but I have to go," I breathed hanging up the phone before he could reply. On the walk back to the car I prayed that all this would be over before anyone could figure out what was really going on. I glanced at the sky before entering the car.

"Please let this work," I prayed, getting into the car. Seth revved the engine and soon enough we were on the road driving towards my doom. I knew this was going to kill me but if it saved Charlie and everyone else then it would be worth it.

*~*~*

**Please review xx**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Hey guys here's the next chapter. I know I can't believe I'm getting it out this quickly either. Before you start reading I just wanted to thank all of you who reviewed. They really do mean a lot. And they give me the inspiration to continue writing. Thanks so much for your support. I hope you like the chapter**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

*¬*¬*

**EPOV**

It felt as if a humongous weight had been lifted off my shoulders. However there was still something about the whole situation that unnerved me. Why hadn't Charlie returned any of Jacob's calls to let us know what was going on? Momentary concern washed through me but I let it go before it could consume my every thought. Charlie was fine and I was just worrying unnecessarily…at least that's what I told myself. Now that I knew that Charlie was ok everything seemed perfect. Bella was finally mine again and nothing would ruin it. We would never be apart again. For the first time in four years I was happy. A goofy smile crossed my face as images of Bella fluttered through my mind.

Almost as if on cue Bella opened the door to Carlisle office and walked slowly towards me. I couldn't help but smile when I saw those beautiful brown eyes stare into mine and I got up from my seat and met her in the middle of the room. I gazed into Bella's eyes for a moment longer before an overwhelming desire to kiss her came over me. I touched my lips to Bella's in a sweet embrace. Suddenly the kiss intensified and Bella moved her body closer to mine. I became aware of her fragile body against mine as her heart pounded in her chest. Like a hormone enraged teenager my desire to be closer to Bella got the better of me and I placed both my hands on her hips, pulling her even closer. Our bodies fit together like two halves of a whole, our lips moving in perfect unison. Bella and I were made for each other. Unfortunately all too soon it became too intense and I forced myself to pull away. I inhaled deeply, more out of habit than necessity, as I hugged Bella close to me. I placed my chin on top of her head as the goofy smile took over my face again. _"Perfection"_, I thought happily.

I felt Bella frown against my chest before she shoved me away from her. She looked up at me her face blank. Confusion and concern washed over me simultaneously, causing my brow to wrinkle. I looked down into the deep pools of brown gazing up at me, trying to decipher what was going on in Bella's head.

"Bella, what's wrong," I asked, voicing my concern. She inhaled deeply before speaking and I could feel the nerves burning within me. Bella was the only person that could make me feel that way. I had lived for over a century but Bella could make me feel like an insecure teenager. I looked into her face but it showed nothing…it reminded me of something, a vague memory but I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

"Edward I don't think I can do this anymore," she muttered hurriedly. I had to concentrate so I wouldn't miss what she was saying. She continued, "I thought I could but I can't it's just too hard". My mind ran at a million miles an hour trying to process what Bella was saying too me. She couldn't possibly be saying goodbye to me…could she? I stepped towards her my hand outstretched, silently praying that this was all a big misunderstanding. When Bella shied away from my touch I knew it wasn't. My heart clenched, feeling as though it was piece of glass that was slowly cracking. I was unable to keep the pain from face as I tried to understand what was happening. Where had this come from?

"What are you talking about Bella?" I whispered, barely able to form the words. My hands began to shake violently so I clenched them into tight fists. Bella tore her eyes from mine and I felt the crack in my heart get bigger.

"Edward I thought I could do this but I can't. You've hurt me too much and I can't just forget it," she murmured. I tried to release my pain in one deep breathe. It didn't work. Comprehension dawned on me and I finally realised that Bella _was_ saying goodbye to me. This situation and Bella's blank face reminded me of when _I_ left _her_ four years ago. I crossed the space that separated us before speaking.

"Bella, I love you. Let me fix this," I begged, lifting her chin so I could stare into her eyes. I knew the pain I felt was evident in my eyes but I didn't care at that moment. I just wanted to understand why Bella was doing this. Bella's eyes showed nothing…her eyes seemed to darken almost becoming black. I gulped back the dry sobs that threatened to escape.

"Edward I love you too," she murmured and I felt a single moment of hope pass over me. Almost instantly that hope was dashed. "I always will but the pain is just too much. Every time I'm with you I get hurt and I can't do it anymore." The crack in my heart got bigger again and it shattered. My heart shattered like glass, into a million tiny pieces. I brought one hand to my chest trying to lessen the pain that burned there. It didn't work, I had caused the love of my life so much pain that she could no longer be around me. Nothing was going to lessen that pain. "You were right I don't belong in your world," she paused and I swear I saw a tear glistening in the corner of her eye. However before I could reach out to her she continued. "If you really care about me you'll let me go," she whispered.

And that's what I did, I let her walk out of the door and out of my life. I thought that leaving Bella four years ago would be the hardest experience I'd ever have to face, in that moment it was apparent that I was wrong. Being the one to watch the love of your life walk away from you was so much harder. Finally, I knew how much I hurt Bella when I left her. Her leaving me was almost like karma. It was payback. I had to go through what she went through, experience the pain she experienced. I had to watch my life, my heart, my everything slip through my fingers, unable to do anything to stop it from happening. I stared at the door for several moments longer and then finally succumbed to the sting of losing Bella.

I was unable to stand any longer. My normally inhuman strength and composure left me and for the first time in my existence I collapsed. My knee's buckled beneath me, not capable of holding the weight above them any longer. I managed to crawl behind Carlisles desk just before the dry sobs that I had been fighting managed to escape. I thought that as time went on the pain would lessen a tiny bit…but it didn't. It seemed the longer I sobbed the worse the pain got. I tried numerous times to stop the sobbing but failed every time. It felt weird to have so little control over my body. I was usually able to control how my body reacted to pain but not this time. This time the pain controlled me.

*~*~*

Hours later someone opened the door and was in front of me before I was able to listen to their thoughts. I held back the sob, waiting to see who it was. When I looked up, Jaspers copper eyes stared back at me. His face mirrored mine and I knew that he could feel the pain that burned within me. Unable to fight it anymore the sob finally broke free. I turned away from my brother feeling embarrassed that he had to see me at my lowest point. I hated that he had to see me so vulnerable. I clenched my fists as another sob shook my body. I glanced at Jasper. His eyes burned into mine as he sat down beside me and placed his hand on my shoulder. I felt a wave of calmness pass through me and I could feel my body begin to relax.

Jasper remained with me, sending waves of calm through my body until finally the sobbing stopped. Exhaustion washed over me and every muscle in my body ached. As if he could read my thoughts Jasper said exactly what I was thinking.

"I guess this is what it feels like to be mortal," Jasper whispered. I looked at him and let out a short laugh. He smiled back at me but didn't say anything more. He knew what I wanted and at that moment I didn't want to speak. I rested my head in my hands trying to release the images of Bella leaving. I concentrated on the feelings Jasper was passing into me. He sent waves of cheer through me and although I didn't feel exactly cheerful, I did feel a little better. After an hour or so of the same thing I looked at Jasper and finally broke the silence.

"How uh…how did you know?" I asked my voice hoarse.

"Alice," Jasper smiled. "She saw Bell-," I winced at the name and Jasper changed what he was about to say. "She saw what happened and she thought you may need some help".

"Uh, of course. Thanks Jas," I smiled a small smile. He nodded. He didn't speak but I still heard his silent question. _"Why did she leave it doesn't make sense," _he asked himself silently. He was watching me and knew that I had heard his question.

"Sorry," he muttered softly and pushed back any other questions. He didn't want to cause me anymore pain.

"It's ok. It's not your fault. Um…," I hesitated. "She said that whenever she was around me she got hurt and she couldn't handle it anymore," I admitted my voice barely a whisper. Jasper nodded.

"Right," he replied. "But it's just I saw Bella when I came here this morning. She…well her feelings showed that she was happy and in love. This doesn't," Jasper stopped when he saw the hurt in my eyes. "Uh… I guess…never mind". He put his hand on my shoulder and another wave of happiness passed through me. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was 4 o'clock. My shift would be over soon so I didn't think there was any harm in leaving a bit early.

"I think I'm going to go out for a little while. I'll see you at home later," I said standing up. Jasper rose from his seated position and nodded at me. I gave him a curt nod before walking down the corridors that led to the exit of the hospital. When I stepped outside into the cool afternoon air I ran into the trees next to the hospital trying to leave all the pain behind me.

*~*~*

I lost all recognition of time as I ran. I glanced at the sky and could tell that it was night but I didn't know the actual time. Sometime during the run I smelt a familiar stench. I paused, searching for the source when a large russet wolf came into my view. He tilted his head staring at me in confusion.

"Jacob," I stated, surprised at seeing him.

"_What the fuck are you doing here leech?"_ he asked in his head as he let out a small growl. It was then that I took in my surroundings. I was about a mile from Bella's house. I let out a small sigh; I had been drawn to Bella without knowing it.

"Look I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come here. I know you never wanted me around Bella. I guess you got your wish. Don't worry I won't bother you anymore," I muttered and turned to leave before I heard a weird sound from behind me. It sounded like a bark. _"Wait, what are you talking about?"_ Jacob yelled at me in his head. I turned around and we both stared at each other in confusion. _"Let me phase ok?"_ I nodded and Jacob went behind a bush. Seconds later he returned in human form wearing just a pair of track pants.

"Ok now tell me what the hell you were talking about. What do you mean I got my wish?" Jacob questioned. I shook my head.

"Bella didn't tell you?" I asked, feeling the pain course through me again. Jacob looked at me confused.

"She told me that you two were leaving. She said that you needed to be alone for a while," he told me. I became confused as my mind began running at a million miles an hour. What was going on here?

"We're…sh-she," I stuttered. "Uh she told me that she couldn't be with me anymore. We're not going anywhere together". Jacob and I stared at each other again. I could hear that his mind, like mine, was trying to work out what was going on. I felt a flash of hope rise in me. If Bella lied to Jacob, maybe she lied to me too.

"I uh…I. Do you have any idea what's going on?" Jacob asked. I shook my head

"No," I whispered. A feeling of unease burned within me and I suddenly felt that whatever was going on here wasn't good. "But I don't like it." Jacob nodded, clearly agreeing with me.

"I'll go talk to my pack…" He paused feeling uneasy about what he was going to say next. "But I have a feeling that your family will have a better idea of what's going on," he admitted. I looked at him and for the first time an understanding passed between us. Our feud didn't matter at that moment, Bella did.

"Ok, meet at my house in twenty?" He nodded in acknowledgement and I gave him directions before he phased and bounded towards Bella's house. I sprinted all the way home desperate to work this situation out.

When I got to the house I gently opened the door and closed it behind me.

"Alice," I yelled. I knew it was unnecessary but panic was starting to bubble deep in me. "Alice," I yelled again. My sister was in front of me within seconds.

"Edward what's wrong?" she asked, concern in her eyes. I looked around and could see that the rest of my family had joined us, concern dripping form them also.

"Have you…have you seen anything of Bella?" I asked unable to clearly articulate what I wanted to know.

"I uh…not since this afternoon when she," she stopped mid-sentence and glanced up at me, sadness washing over her face. It was then that I knew she didn't want to bring up what had happened between Bella and me earlier that day. Before I could reply to Alice there was a knock at the door. I opened it and Jacob and two others from the pack stood before me. I motioned for them to come in and they obliged. When I looked around at my family they all had their noses wrinkled at the smell.

"Uh this is Jacob Black. Jacob this is my family," I said in way of introduction before turning back to Alice.

"Alice you haven't seen anything invoving Bella since this afternoon?" I asked. She shook her head, looking between me and Jacob.

"Edward what's going on," Carlisle asked stepping forward. I shook my head.

"I don't know Carlisle but I don't like it," I said, feeling agitated. I rubbed my hand through my hair unable to say anything else. Carlisle turned towards Jacob and walked towards him, his hand outstretched.

"Hi I'm Carlisle Cullen," he smiled shaking Jacobs's hand. He then turned to the other two and shook their hands. They introduced themselves as Sam and Embry. It always amazed me the compassion that Carlisle could show. Even towards these people who were supposed to be our enemies. I could tell from their thoughts that all three of the werewolves were taken aback by this.

"Could you tell us what is going on here?" Carlisle questioned, looking at Jacob. Jacob nodded and then filled him in on the whole situation. When he finished everyone looked around at each other in confusion. Nobody could figure out why Bella would leave us.

"There's more," Jacob murmured, "um another one of our pack members is gone and we can't get a hold of him." I looked at Jacob and then at Alice.

"He must be with her, that's why Alice can't see her," I decided, suddenly sure of myself. My mind began to process everything and I could feel realisation beginning to form. I just wasn't able to quite figure out what was happening. We all stood in silence, each of us trying to come up with a solution. Finally the silence was broken when a cell phone rang. We all stared at Jacob as he answered it.

"Hello," he answered. There was silence as the other person spoke.

"Seth. Where the hell are you?" Jacob yelled into the phone. I concentrated, listening to the reply on the other end.

"_Jake, I'm so sorry. She said she was going to see her mum. I thought it was weird but I didn't want her going alone so I just went. I didn't want her to get hurt," the voice on the other end sounded panicked._

"Seth," Jacob said calmly, "what happened, where are you?"

"_I'm in Port Angeles. Bella said her mum was here. We stopped at a service station and I had to go to the toilet. When I got out Bella was gone. I'm so sorry Jake…I screwed up," he cried._

"Seth its ok we'll figure it out. Do you need us to come get you?" It was weird seeing this side of Jacob. He seemed to really care for the boy on the other end. I ignored the rest of the conversation, turning towards Alice just as her eyes went blank. Jasper was there in an instant holding her up as her mind went to another place. I watched as images flashed through her mind.

_Bella was in a dark room. The room looked oddly familiar but I couldn't put my finger on where it was. She sat on a chair her eyes fixed on something that wasn't yet visible to us. Then she came into view. Her crimson eyes glared down at Bella as an evil smile crossed her lips. It was then that I realised that Bella was tied to the chair. I tried to yell out to her but failed._

Suddenly I was sucked back to the present. A deafening snarl escaped my lips as I stared at my sister. The anger that pulsed through me was replicated in her. She was as worried for Bella as I was.

"Do you know where she is?" I asked my voice shaking from the fury that burned through my veins. I clenched my fists.

"No, it looks familiar but I can't think of where I've seen it before," she replied, her mind going over and over the vision we both just saw.

"Ok would you like to fill the rest of us in," the annoyed voice of Jacob Black asked. I faced him and he knew what I was going to say before it left my mouth.

"Victoria has Bella," I admitted. Jacobs's eyes became dark and his whole body shook. The one named Sam placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Woah Jake. Settle. We'll find her." He said his voice soothing. Jacob seemed to stop shaking. "Do you have any idea where she is?" Sam asked me. I shook my head.

"No we saw a place but I don't know where it is," I replied, feeling hopeless.

"Well it can't be far from Port Angeles right," Jacob asked through clenched teeth. "I mean that's where Seth is and he didn't lose her that long ago." I considered this for a moment and then nodded. Alice, who had been quickly sketching what she had just seen in her head walked over to us.

"Does this look familiar to you?" Alice asked handing Jacob the sketch. Jacob stared at it momentarily and then looked at me.

"That's…," Jacob started.

"Charlie's house in Forks," I finished pulling the answer from his head.

*~*~*

**Ooo so there it is. I hope you liked it. **

**Review and let me know what you think. Thanks xx**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Hey guys I know it's been a while and I'm sorry about that. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added my story to their favourites. They make me feel special and encourage me to write.**

**Hope you enjoy the chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

**BPOV**

When the car arrived in Port Angeles it was dark. As I folded my arms across my chest to stop my hands from shaking my heart spluttered to a stop before it began pounding. My stomach clenched causing a wave of nausea to pass over me. My mind raced, running through all the different scenarios…all of them ended the same way, me dead. Part of me yearned to go back to Seattle, to go back to Edward and Jake and get them to help Charlie instead. But the other part, the larger part knew that I couldn't, it knew that the only way to save Charlie was for me to go alone. Even if it did end badly it would be worth it if everyone else was safe. I glanced at Seth trying to figure out how I could ditch him, without inconveniencing him too much.

"Hey Bells," he said breaking the silence that had consumed us for majority of the drive. "Do you mind if we stop at the gas station?" I shook my head, thankful for the way things had turned out. There would surely be a phone at the gas station if Seth needed it. When we pulled into the gas station Seth looked down at me.

"Did you want anything?" He asked. I simply shook my head in response, unable to speak because of the guilt and nausea that passed over me. "Are you ok?" Seth asked before getting out of the car. I put on my best fake smile.

"I'm fine," I lied, barely able to speak the words. Seth gave me one last concerned glance before closing the car door and walking into the gas station. I allowed myself a solitary moment to be overcome by the guilt and panic that coursed through me, before crawling into the driver's seat. I turned the key in the ignition and took one last look at the station before turning onto the road, leaving it far behind me. My fists clenched on the steering wheel as images of fire red hair and crimson eyes flashed across my mind. I steadied my breathing, inhaling and exhaling deeply, to prevent myself from hyperventilating.

Approximately 1 hour later I found myself turning onto the familiar road that lead to Charlie's house. The panic that surged through me at that moment couldn't be contained. I stopped the car momentarily resting my head on the steering wheel as I willed myself to go on. A few minutes later I lifted my head, inhaling deeply one more time. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pen from the back and scribbled a quick letter to the love of my life. When I finished I folded it up, placing it in my pocket along with my heart, before I slowly approached my impending death. When I pulled up to the house I parked the car before slowly opening the door. My legs wobbled as I stepped out of the car so I leant my weight against the door. When I finally felt my legs regain their strength I hesitantly walked towards the house. Charlie's house looked eerie, it appeared completely different, like it knew what was about to happen. I felt a shiver roll down my spine as I stepped up on the porch. As I took the last two steps towards the door I noticed one of Charlie's old knives sitting on a windowsill, I grabbed it, shoving it into my dress pocket. I knew that it would be no use against the monster that waited inside for me but I felt more comfortable with my fingers wrapped around the hilt of the knife. I inhaled deeply and pushed at handle. The door creaked open and I slowly stepped inside. As soon as I took that step I regretted it. There on the floor, just inches from my feet, lay a motionless body. A wave of nausea rolled over me as I glanced at the body slumped on the ground, surrounded by a small pool of blood. I knew who it was immediately but my mind denied it. I knelt down next to the body and turned it around so I could look into the face. I heard a choking sound and I turned my head, looking for the source. It was then I realised that I was making the choking sound.

"Mum," I whispered as I shook her body. She couldn't be dead, she just couldn't. All the years of nursing, all the years of saving people and watching them die didn't prepare me for what it would be like when that person was one of my family. I blew two quick breaths into her mouth before placing my hands on her chest. I began doing compressions stopping only to breathe into her mouth again. Part of me, the rational part, told me that I was too late, that she was already dead but I couldn't bring myself to stop.

I continued doing CPR but eventually I was too exhausted to continue and I stopped. Tears streaked down my face as I hugged my mother's body closer to me.

"Mum, please wake up," I begged. I stared in to her cold face for what felt like an eternity, praying for a miracle. It didn't come…she was gone. Gone from this world forever.

"I'm so sorry Mum," I cried. It was then that I heard a soft voice call to me from the kitchen.

"Bells, is that you?" the voice croaked. I placed my mums head back on the ground and jumped up sprinting into the kitchen.

"Dad…Dad," I called. As I stepped through the entrance my breath came out in one big whoosh. The sight before me was hard to look at. Charlie was tied to a chair, bruises all over his body. You could see just from the look on his face that he was in agonising pain… he battled to keep his head up as he smiled a wry grin.

"Bells," he rasped, his smile fading. "What are you doing here, you have to leave." I crossed the space between us and placed my hand gently on his. It appeared to be the only part of his body that wasn't harmed. I moved my hand and gently stroked his face. He winced so I pulled my hand back. Tears began streaming down my face again.

"I couldn't just leave you here," I whispered staring up into his eyes. He smiled a small smile.

"You're as stubborn as I am," he murmured softly, letting out a small laugh. This seemed to hurt as he groaned out in pain. My hands fluttered over his body as I looked for some way to ease his pain. It was useless; I couldn't do anything for him in the house.

"Don't worry Dad I'm going to get you out of here," I said firmly and walked around to the back of his chair.

"No Bella you need to get out of here…sh-she'll be back soon," he stuttered gruffly.

"I will when I get you out of here," I said as I pulled out the knife from my pocket and cut the rope that was restraining him. When he was free I helped him up from the chair, still holding the knife in my free hand. Charlie let out a gasp and I thought I had hurt him again. That's when I heard the evil cackle that I had been dreading. I looked up and saw crimson eyes burn into mine with pure hatred. She looked exactly as she did four years ago. I felt my whole body shake and I placed Charlie back on the chair, willing whatever courage remained within me to return. I stared back at Victoria clenching the knife that remained in my hand. Victoria glanced at the knife and let out a sharp laugh.

"You know that won't do anything to me," she hissed, her voice sending shivers up my spine. I looked at the knife that I had grasped in my hand and then back at Victoria, an idea forming. I bit my lip to stop it from quivering and forced the next words from my mouth.

"It's not for you," I said, suddenly feeling strong, "it's for me". I lifted the knife and placed it gently against the skin on my neck over the carotid artery. I knew what Victoria wanted, she wanted to torture me, she wanted me to suffer painfully, nothing was more important than that. Charlie let out a gasp and groaned as he battled to stand.

"Bells no," he begged. I looked at him momentarily and noticed tears falling from his eyes. I quickly looked away fighting the tears that threatened to escape.

"Ok you let him go and then you can do whatever you want with me," I snapped my voice more vicious than I intended. A small smirk crossed Victoria's face and she nodded. I gave her a curt nod and then looked at my Dad making sure the knife remained against my neck. I didn't want to give Victoria an opening. My Dad was now standing in front of me, his pain gone for the moment. I gave him a small smile as a solitary tear rolled down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away with my free hand not wanting to show weakness in front of the monster that stood before us. Charlie placed his hand on my shoulder but didn't try to pull the knife from my neck.

"Bella…honey…please," he cried. His voice broke my heart, I hated that I had to do this to him but there was no other way. I looked at him my eyes burning into his. He stared back, his eyes full of tears.

"Dad it's the only way. Please let me do this… I love you," I whispered. I glanced at Victoria making sure she wasn't getting close to us. She looked bored as she stared at us but she hadn't moved.

"Come on Bells, we can get Edward and Jake," before he could finish Victoria let out a deafening snarl, bearing her teeth as she glared at us. I took a wary glance at her before turning my gaze back to Charlie.

"Dad, please go. This is the only way," I begged my eyes pleading with him. He shook his head. I racked my brains, searching for a way to get him to leave. Suddenly it came to me. I pulled out the letter that I had written earlier and placed it in his pocket. "Dad you need to go. Give the letter to Edward; he'll know what to do. I'll hold her off until then," I lied, praying that this would work. Victoria snickered but Charlie relaxed a little and kissed me on the forehead.

"Please, don't let anything happen to you," he begged, his teary eyes intense. I avoided his eyes, knowing that I wouldn't make it out of this house alive, but nodded my head in response.

"I won't Dad," I whispered. He stared at me, unmoving. "Please go," I added. He squeezed my shoulder and then hesitantly limped away from me, glancing at me once more before leaving the kitchen. I heard the door close softly but I kept the knife against my neck waiting until the sound of the car engine disappeared completely. When I was sure the car was gone I dropped the knife and stared at Victoria as she stalked towards me. My body begged me to run, to get away, to do something…anything but I knew it was hopeless. In science they say there is a fight or flight response, in that moment I knew neither would help me.

"You know that was kind of sweet," she mocked, now standing just inches from me. "If it didn't make me feel so sick I think…maybe I would have gone easier on you," she let out another cackle. "Who am I kidding no I wouldn't," and then I felt a bone crushing blow to my chest causing me to fall to the ground. I barely had time to comprehend the pain before I was back on my feet, my weight supported by the monster whose sole purpose was to torture me. Silently I wished that I had sliced my throat instead…anything would be better than this. Suddenly everything went black as something hit me in the face, I know now that it was her fist.

I'm not sure how long it was before I came to. It could've been seconds or minutes; the concept of time seemed insignificant compared to the pain that burned within me. I clenched my eyes shut trying to prepare myself for the pain that was still to come. When I felt a cold hand wrench my body into a sitting position I opened my eyes to find Victoria crouching over me.

"You know," she snarled, "I don't know why I didn't think of this last time". I shuddered knowing that she was referring to four years ago when she had killed Ben and Angela. She grinned at my reaction. "Of course I would've had you if that wolf hadn't interrupted me," she hissed. My mind wandered back to that day and I felt the pain overwhelm me. However it seemed to fade as I realised this time no-one would get hurt because of me. "Not to worry though, it's better this way. It gave me more time to prepare," she added, humour in her voice. I stared at her as she placed her hands under my arms and lifted me causing me to scream as the pain in my chest came surging back. She placed me on the chair binding my hands and feet. I closed my eyes, trying to forget where I was. I thought of Edward, beautiful Edward. He was the love of my life, I loved him with all my heart and soul and he loved me back. His face crossed my mind over and over, easing the hurt. I was pulled from my imaginings when Victoria yanked my chin, sending a wave of pain down my spine. I bit back the gasp that wanted to escape. This seemed to annoy her.

"Open your eyes," she snapped. I did as she asked. When I looked at her she was now holding the knife that I had held earlier. I gulped, suddenly afraid of what she was going to do to me. "You do know that your father will get to _them _to late right?" she spat, hatred dripping from every syllable. She stared at me, that evil smirk still on her face, waiting for a response. I nodded but didn't speak, I wasn't sure if I would be able to form the words. Victoria placed the knife against the bare skin on my arm. I stared at her, shock in my eyes. Surely she wouldn't…couldn't do that. Surely the blood would be too much.

"As I said before," she snapped, aware of what was going through my head. "I'm glad we were interrupted all those years ago. It gave me a chance to learn how to resist the temptation". She cackled again and then dragged the knife down my arm, causing me to gasp in pain. Blood oozed out and I bit my lip as traitorous tears rolled down my cheeks. The searing pain in my arm didn't ease. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, ignoring the pain it caused. Victoria snarled and then her fist connected with my face. I heard a crunch and a bloodcurdling scream escaped my lips. The pain in my face seemed to ease the pain in my arm.

"I told you to keep your eyes open," she spat. I battled to do as she said, fighting against the haze in my brain.

I'm not sure what happened after that, my mind didn't register anything. My whole body seemed to shutdown so I wouldn't feel the pain of what she was doing to me. Victoria taunted me as she continued to cut, hit and break every inch of my body but I was unable to understand anything she said. The cloud in my head became too much. Eventually…luckily everything became black and I was no longer in that room with that monster anymore. I began to dream of Edward and I wished that he could be there with me. I yearned to feel his arms around me, to feel him gently caress my face, to have his lips touch mine. I wanted him there to protect me. I knew that it wasn't going to happen so slowly I began to give up. I prayed for death, I didn't want to wake up in that room. I wanted to wake in a peaceful place, a place of serenity and comfort.

"_Don't give up Bella," _a familiar velvety voice whispered. I knew the voice was in my head but I still responded.

"I can't do it Edward. I'm sorry, it hurts," I groaned. The Edward in my head growled. _"Please Bella stay strong for me,"_ he murmured forcefully. I shook my head. _"Bella I'm coming for you, just stay strong for a bit longer"._ I knew that this was my mind just telling me what I wanted to hear but I fought anyway. I wanted to believe that I would see Edward again. I fought against the haze in my head and the pain in my muscles and eventually forced my eyes open. As soon as I did I regretted it. Victoria stared at me her eyes a bright crimson, she smiled and walked towards me.

"It's about time you woke up. I didn't want you to miss the finally," she snarled as she lowered her face slowly towards my neck. Her lips were pulled back over her teeth and my brain screamed for me to run. My heart pounded as Victoria's teeth grazed against the skin on my neck. She sunk her teeth in to the soft flesh and I let out a small gasp of pain. I felt my eyes begin to close and then she stopped pulling her mouth from my neck. My mind ran at a million miles an hour. Why was she stopping? I silently begged for her to continue, to continue until all the blood was drained from my body. I just wanted it to end. The pain from the last time I was bitten was still seared into my brain; I didn't want to feel that again. I looked up my eyes searching for her. She was standing a few meters away, her eyes calculating. I opened my mouth to speak and then the burning started. I screamed the fire in my neck to much. Tears began to pour from my eyes and I struggled against the restraints, ignoring the pain that surged through the rest of my body. It was nothing compared to the burning. I bit my lip not wanting to beg her. Unfortunately after what felt like a century I spoke.

"Please," I begged. "Please just make it stop". She smirked at me and then approached. She lowered her head, placing her lips to the bite. I felt pressure as she slowly began to suck my neck. Slowly the burning began to stop and my body relaxed.

"Thank you," I sighed, my eyes drooping. She laughed.

"You didn't think I'd make it that easy did you?" she asked and then I felt her teeth sink into the other side of my neck. I screamed and tried to shake away the burning that travelled down my arm and chest. I think Victoria was laughing but I couldn't hear it over the screams that came from my lips. After several seconds I gave up. I couldn't handle the pain anymore.

"Please…please just kill me," I cried. I closed my eyes trying to think of anything but the pain. I didn't see her approach me again but I did feel her lips on my neck again. She sucked at my neck and the burning stopped. My mind became cloudy and I could feel every inch of my body slowly shutting down. I felt her untie my hands so I opened my eyes. She stared at the scar that James had given me four years ago slowly lowering her teeth to it. My eyes clamped shut.

"_Bella,"_ the velvety voice yelled. My heart skipped a beat. The voice sounded so close, like he was actually there with me, like he was in the room, like he was going to save me like he did so many years ago, but I knew I was imagining it. I knew it was impossible, how could he be there, he didn't know.

"I'm sorry Edward," I whispered softly. "I tried". I heard a deafening snarl and then everything went black.

I was dead.

*~*~*

**Ok so don't hate me. I know that chapter was a bit intense and it ended in a cliff-hanger but I promise to update soon.**

**Hope you liked the chapter. **

**I love hearing what your opinions so please review and let me know what you think. If you haven't reviewed before give it a try ******** I would love to hear from you.**

**Also I've started a new story because I'm holidays now and I've almost finished this story. It's totally different to this story but i would appreciate if you would read it and let me know what you think. Here's the summary**

**_The Way I Loved You_**

**_Bella thinks her life is perfect. She is in love and is soon to be married to her seemingly perfect boyfriend. What will happen when her highschool sweetheart Edward Cullen shows up to the wedding? Will they rekindle their love or is it lost forever?_**

**Thanks **

**xx**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Hey everyone, so here it is. I know you've been waiting and I'm sorry for taking so long after a cliff-hanger like that. But it's ready now. Thanks to all those who left reviews they were awesome!! If you haven't reviewed before, give it a try, even if it's just one word. **

**Anyway enjoy**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

**EPOV**

***~*~***

My mind began running at a million miles an hour. My heart and soul, my life, my Bella was in the worst kind of danger imaginable. My body froze momentarily before it finally caught up with my brain.

"How long do you think we have," I asked turning towards Alice. She shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to find something that would help. She went through the vision over and over but it didn't help. There was nothing in the vision that would give us a time.

"I'm sorry Edward," she sighed. "I don't know". I stood there momentarily looking around at my family, feeling utterly hopeless. I knew I had to act but I had so many images running through my head. Most of them were of Bella's lifeless body. I swallowed back the sob that threatened to escape. Eventually my eyes rested on Carlisle. He noticed the hopelessness in my eyes and took charge.

"Edward. You, Jacob and Alice take Alice's car," he ordered. He continued to speak to the rest of them but I ignored it, sprinting outside. When we arrived at the car Alice threw me the keys and hopped into the car. Jacob and I did the same and then I pressed my foot to the accelerator, speeding down the driveway and onto the road. I didn't look at the speedometer but I knew that we were going fast, faster than what I would normally drive if it had been any other day. But it wasn't any other day. The love of my life was in danger and I was rushing to save her, hoping, praying no…begging that I wouldn't be too late. I couldn't be too late, I had to save her. I spent the past four years without her and every day was a battle. If she were gone from this earth completely I would have to follow. I couldn't live without her. I couldn't live knowing that it was my fault that she was gone. If I had destroyed Victoria when she first came into our lives, if I had never left, if I had looked after Bella better, if I hadn't let her leave I wouldn't be racing to save her life.

My mind went back to the heartbreaking scene in Carlisles office. It should have been obvious then that something was wrong. I had been so consumed by my own self-loathing that I truly believed that she wanted to leave me. I should have taken more notice of her; I shouldn't have let her leave. I should have stopped her and gotten her to explain but my self-hatred caused me to believe that Bella truly didn't want me. I was so self-absorbed that I didn't see what was right in front of me. It was blatantly obvious now. She didn't want to leave me…not really. _"You shouldn't have let her leave,"_ my mind chastised. I groaned in anger and frustration, banging my head against the steering wheel. The car didn't deviate from the centre of the road and the speed remained constant. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Alice staring at me, her eyes full of concern. She opened her mouth to speak but hesitated, unsure what to say. Truly it didn't matter what words came out of her mouth, no words could change the way I felt.

"Edward it's not your fault nobody could've seen this coming," she whispered. I saw pain cross her face. "Well you couldn't have seen it coming". She turned away from me, feeling guilty.

"Alice," I sighed. "You couldn't have seen it. She was blocked from you". She nodded her head softly but continued to stare out the window. I didn't speak again. Instead I stared at the empty road that lay ahead of me.

*~*~*

I'm not sure how long we had been driving, I wasn't paying attention. I was too consumed by the panic that caused every inch of my body to ache. The car had been silent for so long that when Jacob finally broke it, it shocked me.

"Ok so we know Bella's with…," he muttered, unable to say _her _name. "But why, why did she go to her?" I looked at him through the rear vision mirror, thinking it through. I thought through all the possibilities, nothing seemed to make sense. Last time this had happened Bella had gone because she thought her mother was in danger. All of a sudden it hit me….

"Hey that's Seth' car," Jacob exclaimed before I could finish the thought. I glanced over at the car, praying that it was Bella behind the wheel. It wasn't.

"Charlie," Alice gasped. It was then that I realised it was Bella's father behind the wheel. I stomped on the break, bringing the car to an abrupt halt. We all jumped out of the car. Charlie noticed us standing in the middle of the road and he stopped the car. He opened the door and limped over to us. It was only at that moment that I noticed the bruises and cuts that covered his body.

"Edward, Jacob," he yelled. "It's Bella you have to hurry. Please," he muttered before he collapsed. Jacob rushed over to him and caught him just as he was falling. I clenched my fists. I knew who had done this and if she had done this to Charlie I couldn't begin to imagine what Bella was going through. Every inch of my body clenched in anger and a snarl escaped my lips. I turned abruptly and headed back to the car.

"Get him to the hospital," I ordered, as I ripped the door open almost pulling it from the hinges.

"Wait," I heard Charlie whisper. I turned back to see him pull a piece of paper from his pocket. He winced in pain as he held it out to me. I rushed over to him and grabbed it, slowly unfolding it. I heard Alice and Jacob muttering beside me but I ignored them, focusing on the words before me.

_Dear Edward,_

_I couldn't leave things the way they were. _

_I couldn't leave this world with you thinking _

_I don't want to be with you. I do want to be _

_with you, I have always wanted to be with you. _

_You are my heart and soul and I will always love you. _

_I'm so sorry I had to leave but I couldn't let her hurt my _

_dad or anyone else I care about. I couldn't let anyone _

_else get hurt because of me. Please don't blame yourself, _

_it's not your fault. I had to do this and you couldn't have _

_stopped it. Tell everyone that I love them and I'm sorry._

_I love you Edward Cullen. You have my heart._

_Yours forever_

_Bella _

When I finished the letter I squeezed my eyes shut, jamming it into my pocket. I didn't want this to be the last thing Bella ever told me. I couldn't let it happen, I wouldn't let her die. I would do anything to hold her in my arms again. I ran back to the car and slammed the door shut behind me. Before I could leave, the front passenger door opened and Jacob Black sat down in the seat beside me. We stared at each other momentarily and then I slammed my foot down on the accelerator. As we sped off I glanced out the window to see Alice helping Charlie into the car. Beside me I could feel the anger pulsating off Jacob. Seeing Charlie so hurt seemed to affect him and he, like me, pushed away thoughts of what was happening to Bella. We both prayed that we would get there before we lost her forever.

It seemed like I was driving forever, yet it felt that we weren't getting any closer. I had driven for what felt like an eternity but Charlie's house still seemed so far away. Every second that passed felt like a dagger in my chest. Every second that passed was a second that Bella came closer to the brink. I pressed my foot down harder, willing the car to go faster.

Finally I turned onto the familiar road. As I got closer I heard a blood curdling scream. I cringed at the sound but was thankful at the same time…at least it meant she was still alive. I brought the car to a screeching halt in front of the house sprinting towards the door with Jacob close behind me. I wrenched the door open willing my legs to run faster. As I entered the kitchen I saw Victoria bent over Bella's fragile body. Every inch of her was covered in bruises and I could see several open wounds dripping blood. Victoria's mouth inched closer and closer to Bella's wrist.

"Bella," I yelled causing Victoria to look up at me. Bella's heart accelerated at the sound of my voice.

"I'm sorry Edward," she whispered, "I tried," and then her body slumped. A deafening snarl escaped my lips and I heard a vicious growl beside me as Jacob phased. Victoria sneered at us but continued to lower her lips. I ran towards her and tackled her causing a loud bang to reverberate around the room. We landed against the wall causing it to shake violently before rolling to the ground. Victoria pinned me to the ground her eyes burning with hatred. In an instant Jacob leaped pushing her body off me. His teeth clamped down on her arm and a ripping sound followed. I didn't see what happened after that as my attention was on one thing…Bella. I hurried over to her, my dead heart hammering in my chest. In that moment the blood didn't seem to matter. I just had to save her

"Bella honey," I whispered gently stroking her cheek. She didn't answer, her body remained motionless. "Bella sweetie, please open your eyes," I begged to no avail. I untied her feet taking her into my arms and hugging her close. I placed my ear to her mouth. Her breath came in shallow gasps but it was very faint. I wasn't sure how much longer she could hold on. My eyes washed over Bella's limp body taking in the extent of her injuries. Every inch of her body was covered in bruises and cuts and I could see there were several broken bones. There was also a strong possibility of internal bleeding. When my eyes fell upon the bite on her neck a deep growl escaped my lips. Anger and pain pulsed through me simultaneously and I stared hopelessly at her broken body. Victoria had bitten her and yet she wasn't screaming from the burning. I heard a cackle from behind me and a flash crossed through my mind. I watched as Victoria remembered biting Bella's neck before placing her lips on the bite and sucking out the venom. I glanced back down at Bella and noticed the bite on the other side of her neck. I closed my eyes to keep from crying out loud, I couldn't imagine the pain she must have suffered. One bite was bad enough I couldn't begin to comprehend the pain two bites would cause. I briefly considered changing her into one of us, but I couldn't at that moment, I couldn't put her through anymore pain. Besides I wasn't sure if she even wanted to become one of us. Instead I decided to get her to the hospital. I brought Bella closer to me crushing her body to mine.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I'm going to get help just hold on for me," I whispered in her ear as I stood up. It was then that I noticed that Jacob and I were no longer alone. Several wolves dragged Victoria outside accompanied by my two brothers. I followed, holding Bella's fragile body close to me as I hurried to Alice's car. Jacob, who was now in his human form, ran to the passenger door opening it for me before sitting in the driver's seat. He accelerated on to the road and I could hear his heart beating frantically. I whispered in Bella's ear the whole time, begging her to stay with me. Just as we turned into the hospital car park I felt Bella's hand grip my shirt. One of her eyes opened, staring up at me.

"Edward," she whispered a small smile forming. Even with all the bruises, she was still the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I smiled down at her trying to keep the pain from my face and voice, I didn't want her to know how badly injured she was.

Before I could speak she spoke again. "Am I in heaven," she sighed. I shook my head frantically.

"No Bella you're here with me. This is real," I croaked barely able to speak. She closed her eyes sending panic through me. "Bella you've got to keep your eyes open for me, ok sweetie. Can you do that for me?" She nodded and opened one eye again. Her face became panicked.

"Is…is Charlie ok," she stuttered. She was badly hurt and still she was concerned about others more than herself. I smiled down at her.

"He's fine Bella," I muttered. She smiled and relaxed instantly.

"Edward," she whispered, "can you," she winced in pain.

"What?" I asked helplessly wanting to do anything I could for her. Her wince turned into a smile.

"Kiss me," she mumbled so softly that I nearly missed it. I did as she asked placing my lips gently to hers. It lasted a few moments and when I pulled away she let out a sigh of contentment.

"I love you Edward," she whispered just as Jacob pulled up to the entrance of the hospital.

"I love you too," I whispered, placing a kiss to her forehead before opening the door. Just as my feet hit the ground Bella went limp in my arms. I looked down at her and her eyes were now closed. I sprinted through the hospital doors not concerned about people who may have been watching.

"I need some help here," I yelled as I ran through the doors. Nurses and doctors rushed towards me with a stretcher.

"What happened?" One of the doctors asked. My mind went blank and I couldn't answer. My eyes were locked on Bella who was now on the stretcher.

"She was in a car crash," Jacob said beside me. I nodded at him, silently thanking him for covering for me. I began telling the doctors what had happened and what we needed to do, there was no way I was leaving Bella's life to somebody else. A new doctor who I had never seen before spoke up, interrupting my orders.

"Who the hell are you?" he hissed, clearly perturbed that I was bossing him around. I glared at him, my hands shaking. I didn't have time to argue.

"I'm Doctor Edward Cullen; I'm a doctor at Seattle Grace. You may have heard of my father Carlisle," I said, not even trying to hide the frustration. "And that woman there is the love of my life so if you don't mind I think we'll do it my way," I added. He backed down immediately, obviously scared of me. I looked around at everyone else daring them to question me but no one did. I repeated my orders and everyone obliged, wheeling Bella to an OR. I followed but before I could get too far I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Edward, let me take it from here," my father whispered. I spun around staring into his concerned eyes.

"I'm helping…I have too," I argued. He patted my shoulder.

"You know you can't. It's a conflict of interest. Do you really think you could operate on her," he replied. He had a point; my emotions were all over the place. If this had been anyone else in my place I would be saying the same thing. But it wasn't, it was me and it was Bella…my Bella.

"Carlisle I can't sit around and do nothing," I cried. "Let me help".

"Edward I won't be able to operate with you in the room," he admitted and I couldn't argue anymore. I nodded my head, giving up. "I'll do everything I can. She'll be ok…I promise," he finished, squeezing my shoulder before walking down the long hallway. I stood there frozen, unable to move. My body was in shock, the smallest movement would cause pain to pulse through my body.

When a felt a small hand on my arm I jumped, shocked at the touch. Of course it wasn't the touch I yearned for but I pushed that from my mind before it consumed me.

"Edward honey," my mother whispered her voice full of concern. "Maybe you should come sit down," she suggested. Of course I didn't need to sit down, my muscles were fine. But I had a feeling that I had been standing there for a while and people may have found that a little strange so I let Esmes small form guide me to a seat. She sat down beside me keeping her hand on my back. I tried to smile at her but it came out as a grimace so I turned my head. As I did so I noticed that the waiting room was full of people. All my family was there, as well as Jacob, Sam, Embry and a few other people I assumed were wolves. Beside them was Billy Black, who glared at me. He blamed me and my family for the injuries that Charlie and Bella had sustained. I had to admit I agreed wholeheartedly. If Bella didn't….

I forced that thought away before it could form. Bella was going to be fine, she had to be. I stared at Billy. His thoughts screamed at me but I didn't turn away. Apparently Jacob had noticed the interaction between the two of us because he walked over to his dad, forcing his gaze from mine.

"Dad, stop it," he hissed in a whisper. "It's-," the next thing was hard for him to say. "It's not his fault". Billy didn't agree but he turned his head away all the same. Jacob patted him gently on the back before turning to me. He looked embarrassed for a moment and he nodded at me. _"Ok so maybe you're not that bad," _he muttered in his head. I couldn't help but smile at this and I nodded back. Maybe Jacob Black and I would be friends one day. I could hear a thousand different thoughts around me but I blocked them all out, bowing my head. I stared at the ground, going completely numb. I was completely unaware of my surroundings; the only thing going through my head was Bella. Bella's smile, the feel of her skin, the electricity that flowed through me after we touched, the kisses we had shared recently that were so intense it was hard to pull back. All these images replayed in my head over and over.

I'm not sure how long it was before I resurfaced, it could've been hours or minutes. When I lifted my head everyone was still in the same position. I turned to Esme who was staring at me.

"How long has it been, how long has she been in there?" I asked not sure if I really wanted to hear the answer. Esmes body slumped.

"It's been about an hour and a half,' she breathed. Being a doctor I knew what this meant, it could be a good thing or a bad thing. I wasn't going to wait around to find out. I jumped from my chair, sprinting to the OR where Bella was being treated. I heard everyone call my name but I ignored them. When I was at the door I pushed it open, walking through the scrub room before entering the OR. Carlisle heard my presence immediately and he turned. I took no notice of him. My attention was solely on Bella. She looked so fragile, so broken, so vulnerable. I took a step forward wanting to touch her, wanting to take her hand in mine and tell her that everything was going to be ok. Before I could Carlisle spoke.

"Edward you can't be in here," he muttered. I stared at him, shaking my head. Where else could I be. "Edward you have to leave". I remained motionless, not leaving but not going any closer. Carlisle sighed. "Get him out of here," he said to someone behind me. I felt two sets of hands wrap around my arms pulling me out of the room.

"Come on buddy let's go," Emmett whispered and then I felt a sort of calm wash over me. The other set of hands must have belonged to Jasper. I didn't resist them, letting them lead me out of the room. Once I was out of the OR I slumped down against the wall, my legs no longer able to hold me up. Emmett and Jasper sat beside me each of them placing a hand on my arm. Jasper sent waves of calm over me. They worked for a few minutes before evaporating, my pain taking over.

"She's going to be ok Edward," Jasper breathed beside me. I closed my eyes, resting my head on my knees, trying my best to believe that this was true.

It couldn't have been longer than thirty minutes when Carlisle exited the room. I jumped up as soon as the door opened, meeting him at the doorway. He closed his mind from me, apparently wanting to tell me the news.

"Edward she had a lot of injuries," he sighed. I felt my heart clench. "I've done everything I can. I've stopped the bleeding and put the broken bones in place". I interrupted him before he could finish.

"She's going to be ok though right? She'll wake up when the anaesthesia wears off?" I begged. Carlisle avoided my eyes.

"I can't be sure. Given the extent of her injuries it could be a while before she wakes up if…" he stopped, unable to continue. His eyes bore into mine and it was clear that if he could cry he would be. My whole body began to shake.

"If she wakes up at all," I finished my voice barely a whisper. I could feel my body beginning to shutdown, preparing for the indescribable pain that was sure to follow.

"Edward," Carlisle breathed, placing each of his hands on my shoulders. "She's strong I'm…". I put my hand up stopping him. This action caused his hands to drop from my shoulders.

"Carlisle, don't give me that crap we give to patients," I snapped. "What are the chances?" I asked. Carlisle sighed.

"There not good son and I don't think we can turn her now. It's too late," he admitted his voice cracking. I'd never seen Carlisle like this before. He was always so composed but in that moment he, like me, appeared completely human. He loved Bella. I couldn't hold it together any longer. My knees collapsed and I was falling, falling into a pit of despair. Carlisle grabbed hold of me, wrapping his arms around me. I rested my head on his shoulder. In the distance I could here someone screaming. When the screams became muffled I recognised the screams of anguish were coming from my mouth. I remained there for a moment letting myself succumb to the pain.

"Edward, go to her, talk to her. It may help," Carlisle murmured. I pulled my head from his shoulder and nodded. "She'll be in room 202 soon, you can wait up there". I walked slowly to her room. I couldn't believe that this was happening; I'd only just got Bella back I couldn't lose her now. When I was at the door to room 202 I pushed it open and entered, sitting in a chair. I waited patiently for Bella, praying that she would make it through this.

***~*~***

**Ok so that was it. I hope you like it. It was a bit of a hard chapter to write because there was quite a lot going on but I hope I did ok.**

**Please, please review and let me know what you think.**

**And for those who haven't read my other story go check it out it's called,**_** The Way I Loved You**_**. I don't have many reviews for it and it would be greatly appreciated if you could let me know what you think, thanks.**

**That's all for now, please review.**

**MrsCullen6 xx**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Hey everybody. I hope you're all having wonderful holidays. Sorry this chapter had taken so long I just couldn't get it quite right. I've spent a while going over it but eventually I decided to just leave it so the readers wouldn't have to wait for too long.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed. I love you all immensely **

**Happy New Year**

**Anyway I hope you enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters**

**EPOV**

***~*~***

Thirty minutes later the nurses wheeled Bella into the room, checking that everything was in order before hurrying to leave me alone with my angel. As soon as the door closed behind the last nurse I dragged my chair and placed it beside Bella's bed sitting down as I stared down at her still form. She had several tubes attached and nearly every inch of her battered body was covered in bandages. Despite this however she looked completely at peace. If I hadn't known any better I would have sworn she was just sleeping, that she was trapped in a deep slumber and would open her eyes in a matter of hours. As it was however I did know better. Bella wasn't sleeping and every second that passed was a second too long, it was second that she came closer to the gaping abyss that threatened her very being. I stared at her face wishing, hoping…praying that she would open her eyes and tell me that everything would be ok. I would have given anything at that moment to stare into her deep brown eyes. Pain crushed down on me and I clenched my fist trying futilely to relieve it. When I felt a piece of paper crumple in my hand I relaxed my fist and unfolded it. I read the last lines out loud.

"_I love you Edward Cullen. You have my heart. Yours forever. Bella," _I whispered my voice cracking. I tried to take refuge in the words, hoping that my possession of her heart meant I had some influence in the way things turned out. I loved her and she loved me, without her I ceased to exist. She was my everything, every fibre of my being belonged to her. Our lives were entwined, she'd captured my heart and if she died I would die along with her. I couldn't even begin to imagine living in a world where Bella didn't exist, it was incomprehensible. She couldn't leave me, I'd only just found her again. I needed her, I needed forever…I needed happily ever after. After all we'd been through we deserved that much. Feeling the bitter despair crushing down on me I rested my head on Bella's bed, squeezing my eyes shut trying to fight through the agonising pain. I took her hand between both mine lifting my head so that I could place my lips to the delicate skin on her hand. A jolt of electricity coursed through me at the touch of her warm skin, comforting me slightly.

"Bella," I murmured against her hand. "Bella sweetie can you hear me?" I knew that it was useless really. Part of me knew that she was beyond all help but the other part needed to talk. It needed to tell Bella to fight, to beg her to wake up. "Bella if you can hear me squeeze my hand alright," I added false hope burning within me. I waited with bated breath. After several moments I sighed in defeat but I wasn't going to give up. Bella could hear me…she had to hear me. "Ok honey I know you're in there, I know part of you can hear me and I need to tell you to keep fighting. You have to be strong and fight because I can't live without you…you're my everything. You have to come back to me Bella." I stood moving so my lips were now against her ear. "Please…please wake up," I stuttered, letting out a strangled sob, "because if you don't I won't ever be able to forgive myself, I won't be able to live knowing that I wasn't strong enough to save you." I paused momentarily forcing the next words out. "But worst of all I won't be able to forgive you…I won't be able to forgive you for leaving me when I only just found you again. So please baby, come back to me. I love you." Another strangled sob escaped my lips before I kissed Bella softly on the lips and then on the forehead. I stroked a hand through her hair and then returned to my seat feeling exhausted. Every muscle in my body ached and if I was human I was positive I would have passed out. Actually I wished I could've passed out, the darkness would be a welcome distraction from the pain and despair. Being a vampire however that was impossible. So I settled for resting my head on Bella's bed like I had before, one of my hands grasping hers firmly. I held her hand against my cheek trying to take solace in her touch. I erased all thoughts from my mind and just focused on the feel of her skin against mine, imagining that we were anywhere but in the hospital. In my mind we were in the meadow. The sun was shining down on us and Bella had her hand against my cheek her eyes burning into mine. I stared back mesmerised. It was like I could see into her soul and her into mine. We were completely at peace.

The day dream went on for hours and I was momentarily free of the pain that coursed through my body. The dream felt real, it was like I was actually in the meadow with Bella and she was fine, I almost started to believe it to be true…almost. That was until I was wrenched from my dream when the door to Bella's room opened and a nurse flittered in. The pain came surging back and I bit back the sob that threatened to escape. I jammed my eyes shut willing the pain to ease but it didn't. In fact it seemed to intensify. The nurse sighed as she checked over Bella, her mind filled with sorrow; she didn't hold any hope for Bella. When she finished checking on Bella she left the room shutting the door softly behind her. I was alone again, until Jacob Black walked in. He closed the door behind him but didn't come any closer; he stayed at the door breathing heavily. I could smell the salty tears that streamed down his face and he didn't even try to hold back the sobs. Through his thoughts I could see him staring at Bella's motionless body. He couldn't come any closer; he was paralysed by the fear that washed through him in waves. He couldn't lose Bella either, she was his best friend. After several moments I lifted my head, turning it so I could look at Jacob. His cheeks were stained with tears and his eyes held a look of utter helplessness. He'd seen Bella hurt years ago but it didn't compare. Last time she had woken up within hours, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do this time.

"It uh," I muttered, my voice croaky. "It helps if you talk to her. Hearing familiar voices and sounds is supposed to help." Jacob stared at me, taking a few tentative steps towards the bed.

"What am I supposed to say?" he asked returning his gaze back to Bella. He was still breathing heavily and he clenched his fists.

"It doesn't really matter. Just talk to her, tell her how you're feeling," I urged. I wasn't sure why I was trying so hard to get Jacob to talk to her but it just felt necessary. Jacob stood stationary for several moments before rushing to Bella's side. He stood on the opposite side of the bed to me, kneeling down. He grabbed Bella's other hand, placing it between both of his.

"I can leave," I offered, praying that he wouldn't take me up on the offer. He shook his head.

"No Bella would want you here." I breathed a sigh of relief. Jacob's face crumpled in pain. After several minutes of silence he finally found the courage to speak.

"Hey Bells so uh I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to say. I'm not used to this type of thing," he whispered, dropping his eyes to stare at his hands. He paused for several moments. "I guess what I have to say is sorry. I'm sorry that I let her hurt you when I promised that I wouldn't let anyone hurt you again." A stab of pain went through me; he wasn't the only one to make that promise. We both failed Bella. Fresh tears streamed down Jacob's face and he sniffed before continuing. "I'm sorry I didn't uh," he choked out. "I'm sorry I didn't take better care of you and Charlie. I should have done better. I screwed up…but you've got to be ok so I can make it up to you. You're my best friend Bells…I need you," Jacob finished, laying his head on the bed. His body heaved as he wept, his tears staining Bella sheets. My heart clenched in my chest sending a throbbing pain through my body. I couldn't look at the scene anymore so I tore my eyes away, focusing instead on my feet. Jacob's crying slowed and he took several shaky breaths trying to calm himself. I heard an errant thought cross his mind but before I could understand what it was, it was gone.

"Edward," Jacob whispered nervously. I looked up from my feet to find Jacob staring at me. "Change her." My mind went blank and I was unable to comprehend what he was saying. Surely he didn't want _that_.

"What?" I asked my brow scrunched in confusion. "I uh I don't understand what you want." Determination crossed Jacobs face, he was sure of what he wanted.

"Change her into one of you. I would rather her be a…a," he forced the next word out, "vampire than dead. I couldn't cope if she died. You have to change her," he pleaded. His determination was gone. His words now sounded like a hopeless plea. I considered what he was asking. Could I turn Bella into a vampire? I wasn't completely sure that I could. There were so many different factors that needed to be considered. The biting would be easy enough, I was confident I'd be able to bite her and then restrain myself. I wasn't worried about that. I was more concerned with how Bella would take it. She had already been through an insurmountable amount of pain. She had literally been to hell and back and I wasn't sure if I could be the one to bring that pain crashing back. Or if I did bite her what if her body couldn't take it, she had so many injuries and several bites already. What if her body shut down when my venom came into contact with her skin? I couldn't do that. Plus there was still a chance that she could make it through, it was a small chance but there was still a chance. People had come back from worse…right? Deep inside I knew that nobody had come back from an injury as severe as Bella's but at that moment my mind had to believe that she would make it. That she would wake up on her own and then she could choose whether she wanted to become like me. If…no, when, when she woke up I would respect whatever choice she made.

Jacob was still staring at me when I finally finished my internal argument. It had been at least 10 minutes since he had pleaded with me. He waited patiently for me to consider all the aspects.

"Jake, I don't think I can do it," I muttered feeling completely helpless. "I just I can't…" I continued unable to clearly explain why. Jacob stood up his whole body shaking.

"What do you mean you can't do it?" he yelled. "You're a fucking bloodsucker. It's what you do. Just bite her." My face crumpled.

"It's more complicated than that," I said barely above a whisper. "I'm not sure that I can change her now. If she wants to be one of us when she wakes up-." Jacob walked around my side of the bed and yanked me out of my seat causing me to stop midsentence.

"It's not complicated. She's hurt, she's not going to fucking wake up," he screamed. Anger pulsed through me. I banged my hands to his chest pushing him backwards. I opened my mouth to tell him that he was wrong, that Bella would wake up, she had to but before I could his fist connected with my face. My anger intensified and I clenched my fists preparing to retaliate. However before I could, Carlisle and Jasper were standing in front of me holding me back. Sam and Embry were several paces from me pushing Jacob from the room. Jacob struggled against them his eyes burning with anger.

"You're a fucking coward," Jacob hissed as he was forced out the door. Sam and Embry shut the door behind them and then continued forcing him out of the hospital. As soon as they were gone I relaxed, no longer pushing against the hands that restrained me.

"Get off me," I muttered annoyance flowing through me. I shrugged there hands off and then returned to the seat placing my head in my hands.

"What was that about?" Jasper asked beside me.

"He wants me to turn Bella," I muttered, my voice muffled by my hands. Jasper shielded his thoughts from me. Not wanting me to here his opinion on the matter. I was thankful. "He doesn't get that it might not work." Jasper and Carlisle patted me on the back.

"We understand son, it's ok," Carlisle assured me before both he and Jasper left me alone again.

2 days later not much had changed. Bella hadn't improved at all. Each day it got a bit harder for me to hold on. I hated waiting around constantly but I couldn't bring myself to leave her for a moment. Not even to hunt. My eyes were black with thirst but it didn't faze me. I wasn't tempted at all. Bella was all that mattered. The only people that had entered the room since the Jacob incident were Carlisle and the nurses. They would stay for several minutes checking Bella's stats before hurriedly leaving. Every once in a while I would hear one of my family members or someone from the pack approach the door. They would stand there for a few seconds debating whether or not they should come in. In the end all of them would decide that it wasn't the time. Most justified that they were giving me alone time with Bella, but I knew that they were really scared that I would snap at them if they did enter.

Eventually the pattern broke. At midday, 3 days after my argument with Jacob, I heard my family approach the door. They stood there silently for a second before Emmett spoke up.

"You know what screw this. I'm going in," he muttered before pushing the door open. The rest of my family left, deciding it was better for one person to visit at a time. I wasn't completely sure why but my guess was that they wanted to see how I would react to Emmett's presence before they tried. I felt slightly guilty that I had alienated everyone around me. I hadn't meant too. In fact I wanted everyone to visit Bella…maybe the more familiar voices she heard the faster she would recover.

"Hey bro, is it ok if I talk to Bella" Emmett said approaching Bella's bed. I turned to look at him forcing a half smile on my face.

"Hey Em," I sighed. "Of course it's ok. Bella would want too see you." I stood up. "Take all the time you need." I stood from my chair going to lean against the wall opposite the door. Emmett scrunched his face in concern. At that moment it wasn't concern for Bella, it was concern for me. Seeing me like this hurt him more than he would've liked to admit. To him I appeared completely shattered. He sat down in my seat.

"Hey Bella," he said his booming voice unusually quite. "I just wanted to come and say that I'm thinking about you and that I love you. You know I've always thought of you as a sister." He placed his hand on top of Bella's. "You're like the little sister I never had. You're the only one who can handle my teasing." He let out a strangled laugh, half a smile forming. "Who am I supposed to pick on if you don't wake up?" he asked his smile fading, he gulped before standing up, placing his lips near her ear. "Our whole family needs you Bella. We don't function without you," he whispered so softly that even I almost missed it. Emmett squeezed Bella's hand before leaving the room. As he exited he glanced at me still concerned. He mumbled something to somebody outside and then it was just me once more.

The next couple of days were much the same. Each of my family members had come to visit Bella, telling her how much they missed her and how much each of them needed her to wake up. Rosalie had shocked me when she came in. I knew that she was starting to warm to Bella but I had no idea how much. She had poured her heart out, pleading with Bella to wake up. She said that our family wouldn't be the same without her and that she couldn't bear what would happen to Emmett if Bella died. What shocked me the most though was that she confessed that she would actually miss Bella. It was difficult hiding the shock. The most painful visit however had been Esme's. Esme was only able to mutter a few words before the pain became too much and she couldn't say anymore. She clung to Carlisle and just stared at Bella for the rest of the visit.

*~*~*

A week after the horrible attack there had still been no change, Bella hadn't gotten better. I was almost completely numb now. I had been technically been dead for years but it wasn't until that moment that I truly felt it. I slumped in my chair unable to hold my head up anymore. I tried to keep myself positive but the negative thoughts wore me down until there was nothing left and I found my mind continually flashing back to Victoria's attack. The day passed through my mind over and over. Every movement would send pain coursing through my body. It was as if my body was giving up on me. If Bella couldn't move than neither could I. It had been over a week since I had last fed and I began to feel the burning pain in my throat. It was a searing pain, almost too hard to bear but I couldn't bring myself to care. I almost welcomed the intense burning. In those moments I got a brief escape from the grief, guilt and despair that plagued every other second.

When Carlisle came in with one of the nurses to check on Bella it became too much... My eyes blackened instantly and I could feel the desire deep inside of me. A growl built in my chest and I had to fight to keep it down. To stop myself from lunging on Bella and the nurse I stopped breathing and clenched my fists, resisting the urge. The nurse was completely oblivious to my change in demeanour but Carlisle saw the black desire in my eyes. Once the nurse left he turned to me.

"Edward you have to go hunting now," he ordered. He spoke gently but there was still power behind his words. He was my father. At that time I didn't care. I wasn't going to leave Bella's side. I glared at him, shaking my head.

"I can't."

'Edward, I wasn't asking you. I'm telling you to go hunting before you do something you regret," the softness had gone from his voice and his eyes burned into mine. I sighed in defeat.

"But what if something happens?" I whispered, talking more to myself.

"I'll wait here with her. I promise I won't leave her side until you get back." I still didn't want to leave but I could see in Carlisle's head that I wasn't going to be able to talk my way out of it. I nodded in agreement before hurrying out of the hospital. I didn't care if anybody saw me.

I stayed as close to the hospital as I could, feeding on several deer. As I did so, I was temporarily free from the debilitating pain that had been with me continuously for the last week. It wasn't particularly satisfying but it eased the burning in my throat. Once the burning was a mere twinge I headed back to the hospital. When I got to Bella's room the door was open. I stepped into the room but stopped when I noticed Charlie sitting in the seat talking to Bella. He didn't see me enter.

"Hey Bells," he whispered. "Sorry I haven't come to see you sooner. I had to build the courage. I …I just couldn't bear to see you like this," he cried, tears pooling in his eyes. "Oh god, this is all my fault." He wiped the tears that were now falling from his eyes. "I'm so sorry honey. I should have stayed there and protected you." The pain that had eased whilst I hunted surged back, worsening with every word. "You've got to wake up sweetheart. I've already lost your mother I can't lose you too. We need you. Edward needs you. He's been by your bedside all day, everyday. You two belong together. He… he loves you Bells, we all do." He wasn't able to continue, the hurt becoming too much. He bowed his head and I approached, determined to make everything ok. His words ignited something deep inside of me. I wasn't going to sit around watching Bella suffer any longer. If she died it wouldn't only hurt me, it would hurt everyone. I had been putting it off for so long thinking that it was selfish, that if I did it would be due to my weakness. I was so insecure that I believed that Bella would rather die than be with me but that wasn't true. Charlie's words had proved it. Bella loved me, she wanted me, she chose to be with me, she wanted this life. Placing my hand on Charlies shoulder it was suddenly clear what I had to do. I had to turn Bella. When Charlie felt my hand he raised his head so his eyes bore into mine. I inhaled deeply before speaking.

"Charlie," I said. If I was going to do this I had to get everyone's approval first. Charlie was the most important. "There's a way I can help Bella." I thought that I would have to clarify further but Charlie understood immediately.

"Do it. I can't lose my daughter," he muttered. We nodded at each other and then both stared at Bella.

"If she doesn't wake up tonight and the others agree I'll do it." Charlie gulped nervously. I sympathised with him. It wasn't exactly easy to agree to your daughter being turned into a mythical creature of the night. Taking another deep breath I prepared myself for the hard afternoon that followed.

Alice who had seen what I was planning entered the room followed by the rest of my family, as well as Sam and Jacob. She knew that I needed to talk to everybody so she gathered them for me. All of them seemed to know why they were there.

"Ok," I sighed. "As all of you know Bella isn't getting any better. We all care about her and would do anything to bring her back. So…well I think you all know what I'm asking?" They all nodded.

"Yes," Alice, Rose, Jasper, Emmett and Esme said in unison. Jacob approached me.

"You already know that I agree," he sighed, relieved. He shook my hand. Pleased that, as he put it, I was finally man enough to do what I should have done a week ago. I didn't hold this against him, he was partially right. Sam hesitated, unsure.

"I," he started. "I can't say that I approve and I can't support it." He couldn't look at Charlie and Jacob. He felt he was letting them down. "But I won't stop you. I understand how much Bella means to all of you." I nodded my thanks. Finally I turned to Carlisle. I knew that he would support me no matter what, he was my father but I had to hear him say so.

"Son you know I support you one hundred percent. If you think she's ready and you think your ready than I say yes."

"Ok if she doesn't wake up by tomorrow morning. I'll do it."

*~*~*

The rest of the day passed quickly. Now that I had decided on action, every second didn't seem as painful. It still hurt but the pain no longer controlled me. I could move without being in agony. Part of me was worried however. Doubts started to creep into my mind. What if Bella's body didn't respond to the change? What if I bit her and nothing happened? Or what if I bit her and it was too much for her body? Everybody else had left, they thought that I needed some alone time with Bella to prepare. I was grateful for it. I sat by her bedside, hoping that there would be a miracle. That somehow Bella would wake up so I could ask what she wanted. I knew she wanted me but I wanted her to be there to tell me that I was doing the right thing. I wanted her to choose this life; I didn't want to make the decision for her.

As the afternoon progressed I became more and more nervous. Every cell in my body was on edge and I couldn't calm down. The doubts in my mind became worse. What if I couldn't do it? What if I drank too much of her blood and she died? What would happen then? The nervousness turned into panic. I squeezed Bella's hand trying to rid myself of these thoughts.

When moonlight streamed through the window holding Bella's hand was no longer enough. Careful not to disturb her battered body I climbed onto her bed hugging her body to mine. Comfort washed over me instantly and the panic began to ease. The scene was so familiar. It was like we were back in Bella's bed and I was holding her as she slept. Soon enough I was humming her lullaby, my lips on her ear. One of my hands played with her hair, stopping only to caress her cheek bone. My fingers tingled from the contact. My eyes roamed over her body taking in every inch, searing it to my memory. I frowned when I realised there was one thing I couldn't remember, her eyes. I had a perfect memory but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't remember them.

"Oh Bella," I sighed. "I would give anything to look into your eyes one last time before they are changed forever." My lips caressed her ear. "I would give anything to not have to do this. I need you tell me that this is what you want, that it's the right thing. Open your eyes for me honey," I pleaded, part of me still hoping that I wouldn't have to go through with the plan. I repositioned myself so that I was lying on my side, one hand grasping Bella's, the other caressing her arm. I lowered my face so that I was just inches from her face. Slowly I placed my lips against Bella's, lingering there. As I pulled back I could have sworn I felt Bella's hand squeeze mine. My dead heart pounded in my chest and I held my breath. I waited, motionless, watching for any further signs of movement. After an hour of waiting I conceded that I had been imagining it. I hummed Bella's lullaby again trying to settle myself.

As the first signs of morning light flitted through the window I felt the bitter sting of disappointment. I had been hoping that a miracle would occur and Bella would awaken. But there was no miracle, this was real life. Sighing I stood up preparing for what I had to do. Bending over Bella I kissed her on the forehead.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered. I knew this was going to be agonising and it hurt me to put her through it. I kissed her hard on lips one last time. My over imaginative mind got the better of me again as I felt Bella's lip part slightly and move against mine. I closed my eyes enjoying the sensation, even if part of it was just in my mind. Finally I pulled back, approaching the door. I flicked the lock and then I heard a small moan behind me.

"Edward," the small voice croaked. _Now that's not my imagination_, I thought.

**There we go. I know it wasn't the most exciting chapter but it was necessary. Hope you enjoyed it.**

**Review and let me know what you think**

**MrsCullen6 xox**


	27. Hey

Hey Everyone,

I know that it has been ages, there has been a whole lot of drama and my life became pretty hectic so writing took a back seat. I know its a pissy excuse so i apologise and just want to let everyone know i am now back and i will be updating both my stories within the next couple of days. Thanks to all of you who are still reading you are all awesome.

Talk soon :D

MrsCullen6 xo


	28. Chapter 27

**A/N: Hey guys here's the next chapter. I know it's been forever so thank you to those who are still reading. **

**Hope you all enjoy it **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or any of the characters**

**BPOV**

As I lay motionless I couldn't comprehend where I was. There was no light, there was no blackness that encroached on me, there was just nothing. I was stuck in nothingness, my body pulling me in a million different directions. I wasn't dead but I wasn't quite alive. I was stuck in limbo waiting for something to tip the scale one way or the other. Truthfully I wasn't sure which I wanted more.

Things came to me in flashes. I couldn't see anything but I could feel, I could hear, I could sense.

The first thing I was aware of was Edward whispering in my ear. I could hear the words and feel his touch but I couldn't respond. I had no control over my body. I yearned to touch him, I yearned to speak to him but my body wouldn't allow it.

"_Bella sweetie can you hear me?"_ Yes, yes Edward I can hear you. I tried to yell and kick and scream but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't break through the barrier. _"Bella if you can hear me squeeze my hand alright."_ I tried to oblige but nothing. _"Ok honey I know you're in there, I know part of you can hear me and I need to tell you to keep fighting. You have to be strong and fight because I can't live without you…you're my everything. You have to come back to me Bella."_ And I would fight; I would fight for Edward because he was my everything. I waited for the next words but almost as quick as it had come it was yanked away and I was pulled back into the nothingness. I couldn't hear or feel Edward anymore.

The next thing I recalled was one of my hands in Jakes and the other in Edwards. Who had said they couldn't get along? I could feel Jakes warm lips on my hand. When he spoke he sounded so pained, like he had lost all hope. He was a shell of the man he used to be. Jake was always so strong but not at that moment. _"I'm sorry I didn't take better care of you and Charlie. I should have done better. I screwed up…but you've got to be ok so I can make it up to you. You're my best friend Bells…I need you."_ I yearned to squeeze his hand, to take him in my arms and tell him that none of it was his fault, that everything was ok. No matter how hard I tried I just couldn't do it. It was silent after that but I could feel that Jake and Edward were still present. Neither spoke but I could sense that they were still there. Then, suddenly there was shouting. I couldn't decipher what they were saying but I knew they were fighting. I tried to yell out for them to stop but I was pulled away again.

As time progressed, how much time I wasn't sure, the flashes became weaker and less frequent. _"Our whole family needs you Bella. We don't function without you,"_ Emmett had whispered to me one visit. _"I don't think I can handle what would happen to Emmett if you don't make it, he will die. I'll miss you Bella, we all will,"_ Rosalie admitted when she had come to see me one night. The others had come to visit me but I was wrenched away before I could hear what they had to say.

After Rosalie's visit it seemed like an eternity until the next flash. I had almost given up hope. I thought that I was dead but then I became aware of Carlisles presence. _"Bella, I'm so sorry,"_ he sighed. A dry sob escaped his mouth, followed by another and he leant his head against my arm, his body heaving. He was so anguished, it was heartbreaking. Carlisle was always so composed, yet there he was mourning me. I tried to fight but I was dragged back into the haze that clouded my mind, body and soul. If I could I would've let out a scream of frustration and pain. Hearing that the ones I loved were in so much pain, yet unable to do anything about it was worse than being tortured by Victoria.

Charlie was next. It was hard to hear him as he spoke. It was like he was speaking through a thick haze. The barrier between us was getting stronger, thicker. I could feel myself slipping away. I clung on, his words coming to me in snippets.

"_Oh god, this is all my fault." _

"_I'm so sorry honey." _

"_I've already lost your mother I can't lose you too._"

"_He… he loves you Bells, we all do." _

"_There's a way I can help Bella." _That wasn't Charlie.

At that moment my body was yanked away again. It felt different to all the other times, like I wouldn't come back, like I couldn't. I fought desperately but the haze just seemed to thicken, holding me in place. I gave up hope and then I heard it. My lullaby. Edward was humming my lullaby. It seemed to give me strength and I fought.

"_Oh Bella,"_ Edward sighed. _"I would give anything to look into your eyes one last time before they are changed forever." _Changed forever, was he talking about turning me? "_I would give anything to not have to do this. I need you to tell me that this is what you want, that it's the right thing." _I want this, I tried to scream. And it was true. Though I'd doubted it, though I'd doubted him, I now realised that we belonged together for eternity._ "Open your eyes for me honey."_ I tried desperately, but I couldn't get through the thin barrier that remained between me and Edward. He placed his lips to mine and I tried squeezing his hand. For a second I thought I had succeeded, that he had actually felt me. But almost instantly he returned to humming. As the time progressed, I remained with Edward. I listened to my lullaby dreading being sucked back into the emptiness. I knew that I wouldn't come back. This would be the last time I would be with Edward. I treasured it, locking it away so I could cherish it for eternity. After what I could only assume had been hours Edward sighed.

"_I'm so sorry,"_ he whispered and I knew this was it. Edward kissed me hard and I threw everything I could into it, trying desperately to kiss him back. His lips were soft against mine and I burned it to memory. When he pulled away, I waited for the feel of his fangs against my neck, I waited for the intense pain that was sure to follow but it never came. Instead numbness washed through my body, followed by an intense pain and then there was nothing. I was dead. Edward had waited too long and now I wouldn't see, I wouldn't touch; I wouldn't feel him ever again.

When I opened my eyes the pain returned, shocking me. Every inch of my body screamed out in agony and I let out a small moan. I searched waiting for the blinding light but it never came. Confusion washed through me, I was disoriented. _Where was I? What had happened to me? Was I dead? Was this heaven? _ I couldn't get a hold of my thoughts andI said the only thing I could say at that moment, I called the only name I could.

"Edward." In an instant Edward was there. He was standing right before me. I couldn't believe my eyes, I smiled. It appeared that he'd been wrong about everything. He'd always believed he wouldn't make it to heaven. Carlisle and I believed he would, we had been right. "You were wrong," I breathed. Edward placed his hand in mine.

"Bella sweetie," he whispered his voice dripping with relief. "What are you talking about?"

"Heaven," I mumbled. "You thought you wouldn't make it, but here we are." I sighed in contentment. Edward chuckled.

"Again with the heaven thing," he muttered more to himself than me. "Honey, take a good look around you." I did as he asked, really looking at him for the first time. He was still perfect but there was something about his face that was off. He looked tired and worn, like he'd been to hell and back.

"You look horrible," I exclaimed. He nodded solemnly, smiling down at me. Even his smile looked worn. What had happened to him? I glanced around at our surroundings, letting out a gasp. The action caused me to wince in pain. "This is one screwed up heaven. I thought pain was supposed to leave you when you died and why am I in a hospital?" Edward looked at me through pained eyes. He brought one hand up to stroke my hair.

"Bella you're not dead, this is all real. You've come back to me," he choked out, his voice hoarse. It took me a few moments to process what he was saying. _I was alive?_ I glanced down at Edward's hand, which rested next to mine. He clutched a piece of paper in it. My letter.

"Oh my god, Edward. I'm alive?" Edward nodded his eyes burning into mine. He looked like he would cry. If it was possible I was sure he would have. Edward looked so fragile, like one knock would break him. I could only imagine the pain he had been through. "I'm alive," I almost yelled, sitting up from my position on the bed. Immediately I regretted it. My body screamed in agony, every inch searing in pain. I clenched my eyes shut, crying out. I could feel Edward hovering over me, his hand itching to touch me.

"Bella…Bella," he cried, helplessly. A dry sob wracked through his body. "Oh honey, don't move ok, I'll go get you something for the pain." He sounded desperate. I panicked, he couldn't leave me. I needed him with me. I grasped his hand.

"No…No don't leave me," I whimpered. "The pain will go away just stay with me." He hesitated. "Please." He squeezed my hand which seemed to be the only part of my body that didn't ache. He placed his chin next to my head, kissing me softly on the temple. I bit my lip as tears streamed down my cheeks. Ignoring the pain, I focused on Edward's touch. Very slowly, my body relaxed inch by inch until the pain was a dull ache. With the pain finally subsiding I allowed my eyes to relax. I could feel myself drifting. Before I could however, Edward squeezed my hand.

"No Bella, don't go to sleep…not yet. Keep your eyes open for me ok sweetie," he pleaded, desperately. I forced my eyes open, staring into Edwards. He was now lying next to me, his body completely still. I smiled at his close proximity.

"Ok," I murmured. "As long as you do one thing for me."

"Anything," he replied, resting his forehead against mine.

"Kiss me?" I begged. I needed the familiar sensation. A look of concern crossed his face.

"Last time I kissed you, you almost died. I thought I would never see your eyes, I thought I would never see you smile or hear you laugh…I thought I'd never kiss you again. It killed me," he whispered his voice hoarse. I could feel my heart aching in my chest. I hated that he had to endure such pain. I couldn't begin to imagine what it would feel like if our places had been reversed.

"I'll be fine. I won't die." I needed to feel his lips on mine. My body, my mind, my soul cried out for it.

"You promise?" he croaked. I nodded and he slowly closed the gap. He pressed his lips to mine softly but quickly pulled away. He waited several moments and when nothing happened he kissed me again, this time his lips were more urgent. They moved against mine hungrily.

"Oh Bella," he mumbled against my lips. He opened his eyes gazing into mine. I was mesmerised, even in this state his eyes were hypnotic. "Don't ever leave me again," he begged. He looked so vulnerable in that moment; I had never seen Edward like that before. I wasn't sure if he had ever been like that before. He was usually so in control, so composed. But now he looked so weak, so fragile, in that moment he looked completely human. Though Edward was immortal he was still capable of feeling loss. "I can't live without you," he added almost in a whimper. The scene wrenched at my heart and tears streamed down my cheeks. I yearned to ease his pain. I cupped both his cheek in my hands, ignoring the agonising protest from the muscles in my body.

"I'll never leave. I promise," I assured him. The words sounded weird coming from my mouth. Edward had always been the one to reassure me. I crashed my lips to his, our lips moving in unison. It was like our first kiss and last kiss combined. Neither of us could get enough. When we finally pulled apart, Edward rested his head on my chest letting out a small sigh. Neither of us spoke after that. Edward was listening to my heartbeat and I was enjoying holding him again.

I'm not sure how much time passed. Both Edward and I were so content with each other that neither of us felt the need to speak. We enjoyed the silence. It gave me time, time to think…time to remember. Suddenly I was filled with the need to know more. I needed to know everything.

"Edward," I muttered breaking the silence. "What happened exactly? I mean after I left," Edward cringed against my chest. "How did you get to me so quickly? How did you know that I was lying?" Edward lifted himself up, moving so he was now lying beside me. He took one of my hands in his and squeezed lightly

"Well I didn't, not right away at least. I was a mess at first," he admitted. Even now it was hard to watch him reliving the pain I had caused when I left. I couldn't believe that I'd had the strength to go through with it. If it came down to that again I knew I wouldn't be able to do it. I gave his hand a squeeze to assure him that I was there now and wasn't going anywhere. He smiled a sad smile in return. "After you left I couldn't bring myself to do anything. I stayed in Carlisle's office for hours." Guilt washed through me and I looked down. Tears streamed down my cheeks, I hated that I had caused him so much anguish. Edward raised his free hand to wipe away the tears before he continued, telling me everything that had happened.

By the time he finished I was a mess. By trying to prevent everyone from getting hurt it turned out I hurt them even more.

"Oh Edward I am so sorry," I cried, resting my head on his shoulder. "I just," I tried to explain but I couldn't. Edward kissed my forehead.

"Shhh Bella its ok," he murmured. "It's over now." He lifted my head so we were gazing into each others eyes. "None of that matters anymore. All that matters is that you are here with me…I'll never let you go again." His eyes burned into mine as he lowered his head, placing his lips softly against mine. "We'll be together always." I nodded, the tears slowing. And in that moment everything became clear, I would walk through the deepest depths of hell if it meant I could be with Edward. No amount of pain would keep us apart.

"Edward, change me," I whispered, voicing my thoughts. Edward hesitated. He opened his mouth to speak but I placed a finger on his lips, hushing him. Pain jolted through me but I ignored it. "No protests. Listen, you were going to do it anyway when you thought I was dead and I don't want to waste anymore time. I'm not a teenager anymore, I know what I want and what I want is you. That means being a vampire. Please." I was surprised when at the end of my spiel Edward smiled.

"I agree honey, but..." I let out a frustrated groan, there was always a but. I opened my mouth to tell Edward as much and argue but he stopped me. "But," he said emphasising every letter, "I think we should wait until you are recovered and out of hospital." He placed a hand gently on my cheek. "You've already been through so much; I couldn't stand to put you through more pain." I nodded, staring into his eyes. "But," he added, smiling this time, "I promise once you are fully recovered I will change you."

"Ok," I replied, letting out a small yawn. Edward chuckled, placing a small kiss on my forehead. I felt him move but he was back in an instant.

"Sleep now sweetheart," he whispered and started humming my lullaby. And with that I closed my eyes and let myself drift into the darkness that only sleep could bring.

**Ok so there it was, hope you all liked it. Review and let me know what you think . For those who haven't read it yet I have another story called, _The Way I Loved You_. Go check that out and let me know what you think.**

**Thanks**

**MrsCullen6**


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